Today when I walked into my economics class I saw something I dread every time I close my eyes. Someone had brought their new gaming laptop to class. The Forklift he used to bring it was still running idle at the back. I started sweating as I sat down and gazed over at the 700lb beast that was his laptop. He had already reinforced his desk with steel support beams and was in the process of finding an outlet for a power cable thicker than Amy Schumer's thigh. I start shaking. I keep telling myself I'm going to be alright and that there's nothing to worry about. He somehow finds a fucking outlet. Tears are running down my cheeks as I send my last texts to my family saying I love them. The teacher starts the lecture, and the student turns his laptop on. The colored lights on his RGB Backlit keyboard flare to life like a nuclear flash, and a deep humming fills my ears and shakes my very soul. The entire city power grid goes dark. The classroom begins to shake as the massive fans begin to spin. In mere seconds my world has gone from vibrant life, to a dark, earth shattering void where my body is getting torn apart by the 150mph gale force winds and the 500 decibel groan of the cooling fans. As my body finally surrenders, I weep, as my school and my city go under. I fucking hate gaming laptops.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Lower case is for the lower class
twitchquotes:
╰༼ಠʖ̯ಠ༽ﾉ LOWER CASE IS FOR THE LOWER CLASS ╰༼ಠʖ̯ಠ༽ﾉ
twitch chat
Kripp
Donging through the snow
twitchquotes:
ᕕ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ Donging through the snow ᕕ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ ᕕ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ In a one dong open sleigh ᕕ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ over the dongs we go ᕕ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ donging all the way ᕕ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ
twitch chat
Forsen
Come Down Kid (in Farsi)
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⠋⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⢻⣿⠋⠉⠙⠻⠿⣿⠏⢻⣿
⣿⡇⠸⠿⠏⠻⠿⠆⢸⣿⣿⡟⠰⠆⠘⠷⠴⠖⠂⠀⠴⠿⠇⢸⣿
⣿⣧⣀⣀⣠⣄⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣷⣤⣶⣀⣀⣀⣤⣼⣄⣀⣀⣀⣼⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣟⣛⣙⣿⣙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣩⣹⣿⣿⣋⣻⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠻⣿⡇⠀⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣴⣿⡟⢿⣿⠛⣿⣧⠀⣿⡇⠀⣿⣅⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⢹⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠙⠛⠛⠁⣸⡟⠿⠿⡿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⠟⡟⢿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
Response to "go fuck yourself"
What if I'm already fucking myself? Behind this simple insult hides a universal paradox that may put your sexuality in question. Let's do a simple thought experiment: imagine us two standing in front of each other. I, of course, am wearing a pair of jeans, that are covering my genitals and my butt. You then command me to "go fuck myself". I may be fucking myself already. I may as well not be fucking myself already. Until my dick and its position relative to my ass is observed, it is simultaneously in my ass, but also outside of it - thus, it stays in superposition. The moment you lay eyes on my penis, both states collide with each other and become either one. You may have already guessed what the problem here is. As soon as a single photon reflected by my dick enters either one of your eyes, you become gay. The only way to avoid this is to not observe my penis. But if you don't look at it, then you will never know if your insult had any effect, thus rendering it meaningless. Since you have already made the insult, you are now, too, in superposition - you're either wrong, or gay. It's unfortunate, really - you dug a hole for yourself without even knowing it. All you can do now is accept it, and learn from your mistakes.
Classic
Valorant censorship
At least you have the fucking balls to say it.
Like in Valorant in the voice chat if you call someone a retard for being trash at the game and not using a mic, and he's a Russian player, you're "banned". Nevermind that the race of the player exists independently from how trash he is at the game. Obviously not all Russians have no mic, (correlation/causation), but this "all players are equal" political correctness bullshit is making it impossible for Valorant players to solve a problem they cannot discuss.