Today when I walked into my economics class I saw something I dread every time I close my eyes. Someone had brought their new gaming laptop to class. The Forklift he used to bring it was still running idle at the back. I started sweating as I sat down and gazed over at the 700lb beast that was his laptop. He had already reinforced his desk with steel support beams and was in the process of finding an outlet for a power cable thicker than Amy Schumer's thigh. I start shaking. I keep telling myself I'm going to be alright and that there's nothing to worry about. He somehow finds a fucking outlet. Tears are running down my cheeks as I send my last texts to my family saying I love them. The teacher starts the lecture, and the student turns his laptop on. The colored lights on his RGB Backlit keyboard flare to life like a nuclear flash, and a deep humming fills my ears and shakes my very soul. The entire city power grid goes dark. The classroom begins to shake as the massive fans begin to spin. In mere seconds my world has gone from vibrant life, to a dark, earth shattering void where my body is getting torn apart by the 150mph gale force winds and the 500 decibel groan of the cooling fans. As my body finally surrenders, I weep, as my school and my city go under. I fucking hate gaming laptops.
What happened to this ad? :(
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bbz will u luv me 4evr
gurl was walkin2 skewl wit her bf n they were crossin da rode.
she sed "bbz will u luv me 4evr"
he said "NO.." ... da gurl cryed N ran across da rode b4 da green man came on the sine.
boy was cryin and went to pic up her body.
she was ded.
he whispered 2 her corpse "I ment 2 sey i will luv u FIVE-ever..." (dat mean he luv her moar den 4evr)
xxx~*...LIKE DIS IF U CRY EVRY TIME...~*xxx
Classic
His name was Norman Reedus
I had this friend who used to brag to us all the time that he could catch his cum in his mouth without fail every time he masturbated. He actually wrote down how many times he successfully did it. 327. I’ll never forget that number. And every day at school, he would talk about this. It was always during lunch my sophomore year of high school, too..so it was extremely unnecessary. He used to always try to demonstrate his techniques with packets of mayonnaise but we’d always threaten to move tables so he’d stop. He was really one of those people who needed attention constantly. Aside from those times at lunch, he was a completely normal dude. Like…even after class we’d ask him about that stuff and be like “dude, what was with that cum stuff at lunch,” and he’d always look at us like we were crazy and say “what the hell are you talking about?” I’ll never forget that classmate. His great personality will always be remember but his perplexing obsession with catching his own ejaculate in his mouth will live on forever at my previous high school. He was a one of a kind guy. His name was Norman Reedus.
Gaben
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⠋⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⡟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⢻⣿⣿⣿
⣿⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣔⢤⣄⡀⠄⡄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿
⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣨⣵⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣦⣤⣀⣿⣷⡐⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢿⣿
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⢚⣿
⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠛⠛⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⣻⣄⣤⣮⡝⣿
⣿⠆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠘⣿⡗⡕⣋⢉⣩⣽⣬⣭⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣝⣻⣷⣿
⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠠⢀⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣿
⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠰⣶⡗⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣌⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡛⠱⢿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠨⡿⠿⠿⣿⣟⣿⣯⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⢷⣦⠄⠄⠐⢶⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡄⠄⠄⠉⠄⠄⠄⢉⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠄
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄
⣿⠿⠛⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄
I hope your sub's $5 are in Zimbabwean currency
twitchquotes:
Wow, Kripp, I was really impressed by how you drew adequate cards and played them in the same ball-numbing, drone-like motions you always do. I hope your sub's $5 are in Zimbabwean currency. ( ° ͜ʖ͡°)╭∩╮
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Kripp