[Copypasta] Response to a your mom joke

I do not care what you say about my mother. Your opinion is your opinion. But trust me, if you actually attempt to do something to my mother, even though she's made some bad decisions in the past that we still need to work through, I will personally call the police on you and I'll be laughing as your mugshot is shown on TV. You don't even know her, do you? The point of your entire existence seems to be to just tease other people. Well, I believe your jokes are in bad taste, and you should cease and desist digging through the dregs left at the bottom of the joke barrel; you could get a splinter, whose pain will be significantly increased by the significantly high amount of salt you carry in your bloodstream. Thank you, and let us cease talking about each other's parents.
December 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

What kind of bees make milk?

twitchquotes: What kind of bees make milk? Boobees
twitch chat
July 2014
Reynad

Copypasta jokes are not funny

twitchquotes: Copypasta jokes are not funny. It’s annoying and incredibly irritating to me when I say something in chat because I would enjoy actual responses and I instead get my own words thrown back at me. Please don't just copy my messages and be original! Thank you!
twitch chat
September 2019

You're just typing in twitch chat

twitchquotes: My beautiful Hafu turns to me in bed and kisses me. Her cute smile fills me with happiness. Hafu holds me close as she whispers in my ear: "You know this isn't real. You're just typing in twitch chat. You're alone." "10/10 body." I miss lethal.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

DrDisrespect cheats

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣿⣟⣿⣯⣽⣿⣟⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠟⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣵⠍⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣻⣶⣶⣿⣴⣏⡟⡶⠿⠿⠛⠻⠆⠄⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣟⡻⠿⡨⢻⣯⣷⣟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠺⢻⢽⣛⣳⣴⣿⢾⠛⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣔⣂⣠⠤⠉⣀⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣻⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣥⣤⣂⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⠉⠉⠛⠛⠻⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠶⢖⠄⢀⣴⣿⡇⠛⢿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣀⣀⣠⣀⡀⠄⠄⢀⣀⣤⣶⣿⣿⠄⣼⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠻ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣼⣿⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢁⣸⢿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣛⣩⣭⣼⡿⠃⠄⠄⠉⠛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠗⡆⡄⠄⠈⢷⣄⡀⠄ ⠟⠛⠛⣿⣟⡉⠁⠄⠄⡀⣄⣀⣀⣀⠄⠉⢿⣿⡿⠿⢋⣾⣷⡷⡄⠄⠄⠈⠻⣷ ⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⢠⠡⢢⣭⣽⣿⣿⣆⠌⠄⠈⢠⣸⡿⢹⡇⢡⠄⣤⠄⣶⡄ ⣿⢷⣿⣿⣷⡤⡀⠄⣬⠄⠄⠉⠛⠛⠙⠁⠄⠄⠠⠾⣿⠁⠟⠑⠄⠘⣿⠄⢻⡟
May 2019

GME stock and WSB vs short sellers

Let me tell you what happens tomorrow because it's even worse than what happened today. There they are, Melvin Capital. Furiously jerking their 2 inch boomer cocks to their GME short gainz. They are so close, edging themselves with "Oh yeah, the next Blockbuster" and "Yes baby, brick and mortar go bye-bye." They even sit in a circle sucking and jerking each other off, double fisting like they're skiing down Mt. Everest with cocks instead of poles. Out of nowhere, Ryan Cohen steps in with the most massive and vieniest schlong they've ever seen. He starts eating their lunch and muttering about Cheey for games and they can't do anything because their engorged penises are stuck in eachothers mouths and poop chutes. They attempt to ignorr him and try to keep jerking but they accidentally used hand sanitizer instead of lotion. BAM GME starts rising from the ashes and the retards of WSB are lighting the fires. We brought lighters that we borrowed from our wives boyfriend's and they weren't those shitty clear one. We have motherfucking Bics and torches. Melvin is crying and pleading but we are too retarded to understand coherent English. They see giant red dildos on their screens and their buttholes begin to pucker. They dump everything they have at us in an attempt to supress the price but again, we only understand broken english and emojis. We only understand basic visuals and colors. When we see green, we buy. When we see red, we take out another student loan or CC cash advance and we buy more. We are fucking unstoppable. GME skyrockets and they start scrambling to pull dicks out of random orifices, but it's too late. Bears R Fuk. After we are done splooging all over their faces, and becoming their wife's new boyfriends, we throw Melvin and BOA on the chopping block to be liquidated and disposed of. That's what happens tomorrow, and we are gonna turn that shit into a movie.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Text-to-Speech Playing