[Copypasta] Response to a your mom joke

I do not care what you say about my mother. Your opinion is your opinion. But trust me, if you actually attempt to do something to my mother, even though she's made some bad decisions in the past that we still need to work through, I will personally call the police on you and I'll be laughing as your mugshot is shown on TV. You don't even know her, do you? The point of your entire existence seems to be to just tease other people. Well, I believe your jokes are in bad taste, and you should cease and desist digging through the dregs left at the bottom of the joke barrel; you could get a splinter, whose pain will be significantly increased by the significantly high amount of salt you carry in your bloodstream. Thank you, and let us cease talking about each other's parents.
December 2020
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More Copypastas

Kripp suffers from Casualitis

twitchquotes: Romanian doctor say in thick accent, "He suffer from Casualitis, too many salts in blood." OJ is injected into the Kripp, but he continues to mumble "Really bro," and "Wow," numerous times. A priest enters and rips a bag of pepperonis over the Kripp. Papparin say "Drink with me friends," and offer cappucino to all.
twitch chat
September 2014
Kripp

What the heck did you just flipping say about me, you big meanie?

What the heck did you just flipping say about me, you big meanie? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Tiny Tots Program, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on the girl's bathroom, and I have over 300 confirmed noogies. I am trained in Nerf warfare and I have the most gold stars in the entire kindergarten class. You are nothing to me but just another butthead. I will beat you the heck up with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my dang words. You think you can get away with saying that baloney to me on the glowy type-box? Think again, doodiehead. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of teachers across the USA and your parents are being called to pick you up right now so you better prepare for the spanking, junior. The spanking that wipes out the dumb little thing you call your playtime. You're in big darn trouble, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can wedgie you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed fartfights, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States PTA and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your dorky bottom off the face of the playground, you little poopypants. If only you could have known what serious punishments your little "smartypants" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your goshdarned tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you silly doofus. I will spray boogers all over you and you will cry about it. You're frickin grounded, buttmunch...
August 2021

Navy Seal

An exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke

Greetings. My name is Beef, and today I would like to present an exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke. I will now begin. Your biological mother is so morbidly obese, when she went to go get her yearly physical done, the doctor took her blood and the results concluded that she had a high blood pressure, onset type 2 diabetes, hypertension and the possibility of heart disease. She also suffers from severe depression, because she lacks confidence in her physical appearance, which enables her to consume even more food, making her more obese. Not to mention, but your mother is becoming so monstrous, she had a hard time fitting through small spaces and exceeding weight limits on practical applications. Your mother has an endless cycle of malicious eating habits that only make her health worsen over time. I hope whoever has just read this enjoyed the humorous "your mother" joke. Thank you for your time, and have a blessed day.
April 2022

Purify is not particularly fun or interactive

twitchquotes: Purify created a strategy that revolved around trying to lose to your opponent in one turn without requiring any cards on the board. Silencing your own minions and battles between the players and Blizzard make an overall game of Hearthstone more fun and compelling, but spending 2 mana on a trash card in one turn is not particularly fun or interactive.
twitch chat
August 2016
Reynad

Hearthstone

FeelsFurryMan

⠄⠄⢀⣤⣤⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣴⣶⣿⢱⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢠⠈⣿⣿⣿⣷⡦⢀⣤⣤⣤⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⡀⠴⠶⠿⢿⣿⣿⢸⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠸⣧⠹⢿⣿⡿⢡⣾⣿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣶⣄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣝⢿⢸⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢀⣿⣧⡌⠿⢡⣿⣩⣴⣾⣿⣿⣶⣬⣝⡃⠟⣫⣭⣭⣭⣭⣥⡘⢿⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿⡟⢫⣭⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣦⢻⡟⢫⣶⠒⠒⠒⣶⣤⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢀⣙⣥⣴⣿⣿⡟⠥⠞⣫⣭⠁⠂⠄⢲⣶⣬⡈⢙⣩⠄⠂⠄⢰⣦⣭⣁⠄⠄ ⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣍⣛⣀⠄⠄⣚⣋⡉⣰⣞⣛⣂⣀⣀⣘⣋⠉⠉⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡿⣋⣥⣾⣿⣿⠿⠟⠟⠻⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠏⣁⣀⠆⠿⢉⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⡀⠄⠰⢶⣰⠿⠿⢿⣉ ⠿⠟⢛⣩⣭⣥⣶⠶⢚⣩⣄⠄⠺⠿⠻⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⠷⠄⠐⣉⡓⠲⠤ ⣶⣿⡿⠟⠛⣉⣴⡾⠄⣉⠤⠤⢭⣍⣛⣛⣓⡒⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⢚⣛⡛⠉⠙⢦⣄ ⠋⣥⣶⡾⠿⢋⣡⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣦⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⡭⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠉ ⡿⠄⠃⢤⣄⣛⡛⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⣶⣿⣿⣶⣶⣬⣭⣭⣭⣙⣓⣒⣒⣒⣒⣒⣒⣰⣶⣦⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
November 2021

Pepe

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