[Copypasta] Hello Chat! I like attention

twitchquotes: Hello Chat! My name is Attention Whore. I only speak in large paragraphs or spam in short messages all in caps. I will consistently spam profanity almost in an attempt to find the boundaries of what is a bannable offense. Please yell at me and give me all your attention. Thank you for understanding and don't copy and paste this :) :)
twitch chat
May 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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An Urgot main

twitchquotes: Hey as an URGOT main I go on to this "skill-capped.com" and what do i find? ABSOLUTELY nothing!! Why is this QT what am I to do with my life?
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

RENGER needs to be BANNED. YOU do NOT want to catch A BOLA

twitchquotes: You all should be aware of this great danger going on. From now on RENGAR needs to be banned in every game you play. YOU do NOT want to catch A BOLA
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie

which position would you be in a human centipede?

When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however would answer third. Why you ask? When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however, would answer third. Why you ask? When the first member of the centipede is fed, they will eventually defecate forcing the second member to ingest their feces. One could imagine that would be considered incredibly disgusting. As such, the second member would immediately vomit. After vomit travels into the first member's anus and up into their colon, they'll then pust another load into the second member's mouth even more disgusting than the last. The third member would never ingest the feces of the second member as they will always vomit what the first member expels back into them. The third member of the centipede gets to chill while the first and second trade a volley of shitty barf with each other forever.
May 2022

JUSTICE RAINS FROM ABOVE

twitchquotes: ヽJUSTICE｀、｀RAINSヽ｀ヽヽ☂ PogChamp ☂ ヽヽFROMヽ｀ヽ｀、｀ABOVEヽ｀
twitch chat
February 2017

Overwatch

⚠️ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my penis was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.
August 2021
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