[Copypasta] Promoted to mod status

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twitch chat
February 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Trump shrug

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠟⠟⠟⠿⠿⢿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿ ⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⢿⠟⠛⠉⠈⡀⠄⠔⠄⠅⣐⠐⡄⠄⠂⠄⠠⠑⡝⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⢨⠠⡐⢈⠄⡅⠐⠨⢐⠁⠃⠔⠡⣂⢅⢊⠸⡐⠄⠁⢟⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⢣⢑⡕⢄⠥⡡⢊⠌⣒⢔⡪⣖⢥⡣⣎⢞⢜⢜⢢⡁⠂⡈⣿⣿⣿⣟⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⡼⡽⡮⡳⡡⢨⠱⠹⢰⠹⡚⡸⡘⡜⠜⡜⡜⡐⠡⡘⠐⣜⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣏⡯⣯⢏⠪⡰⠔⡢⢡⢣⢕⣜⣼⣶⣮⡺⢐⠆⠅⠕⣌⠠⣯⢿⣿⢿⣿⣾ ⣿⣿⣯⢯⢺⢪⢑⣀⣦⣾⣿⣿⠁⠙⡿⢿⠵⡛⣚⠶⢘⡢⡘⡆⣿⢟⡿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣣⣷⡑⣼⡾⡺⣘⡬⢹⠠⠐⢀⠂⠉⠉⠄⠄⠅⢌⢊⢎⢧⡫⠣⡻⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣷⣗⣗⢍⠊⠉⠁⠄⡷⡀⣀⢄⡑⠦⣆⣆⡢⡡⡊⢆⠕⠍⢞⢀⢯⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣾⣗⣳⢕⢔⢐⢤⡳⡺⣿⣿⢟⠋⠈⠌⡛⣷⠳⡡⡑⢜⠌⠄⣊⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢝⢗⣝⢾⢏⣣⣱⣩⡽⠴⠖⡓⡚⠩⢃⠯⡪⢪⢪⢽⡪⣷⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣅⢕⢵⡑⡉⠏⢷⢵⡶⠶⠗⠭⠘⡈⢘⢞⢜⢵⣫⡚⡮⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣟⣿⣿⣿⣧⣻⣮⢮⡪⡀⠑⢔⢈⢄⡐⡀⠢⢅⢇⢧⢗⣗⢇⣿⣽⣾⣿⣿ ⠿⠻⣛⡽⡽⢿⢻⣖⡽⣷⣘⢯⣦⡥⣟⣾⣾⣾⣽⣽⣯⣷⣻⣮⡳⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡞⡯⡯⡿⣻⢵⣻⢿⣿⣾⣞⣮⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣯⣷⠟⠄⢿⣽⣻⡺⡽ ⡣⡫⡪⡫⡺⣹⢞⣟⡿⣿⡪⡛⢞⢟⣿⣾⣿⣿⣻⣿⣽⠟⠁⠄⠄⢸⣿⣷⣟⢿
ascii art
March 2020

Hey Kripp, its Chad from the college football team

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, its Chad from the college football team, how you been bro? I see you're still playing video games some things never change! Hey are you still playing the wizard of warcraft game? I never had time for video games I was too busy playing football and going to frat parties. Anyways good seeing you bro,call me and we can hit the clubs.
twitch chat
September 2015
Kripp

An exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke

Greetings. My name is Beef, and today I would like to present an exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke. I will now begin. Your biological mother is so morbidly obese, when she went to go get her yearly physical done, the doctor took her blood and the results concluded that she had a high blood pressure, onset type 2 diabetes, hypertension and the possibility of heart disease. She also suffers from severe depression, because she lacks confidence in her physical appearance, which enables her to consume even more food, making her more obese. Not to mention, but your mother is becoming so monstrous, she had a hard time fitting through small spaces and exceeding weight limits on practical applications. Your mother has an endless cycle of malicious eating habits that only make her health worsen over time. I hope whoever has just read this enjoyed the humorous "your mother" joke. Thank you for your time, and have a blessed day.
April 2022

Stroll in my local GameStop

stroll into my local GameStop looking to pick up a copy of Binding of Isaac grab the game and take it to the charming maiden at the register "Pardon me, milady...but could you ring me up? A shame I don't have your number or I'd ring you up instead..." she giggles and takes the game, blushing as her fingers brush mine due to my fingerless gloves her eyes widen as she reads the game's title "Wow, I've never seen anyone buy this before! You must have special taste!" I smile and ready a witty response when suddenly a voice rings out from behind "Hahaha look at what this ♥♥♥♥♥♥ is buying! That's not Call of Duty Advanced Memefare! What a piece of ♥♥♥♥!" I quickly turn around, my cloak billowing behind me, to discern the source of the rude outburst generic dudebro caricature with a sports team cap and "the guy that beat you up that one time behind the school in early October" shirt is standing there guffawing "Excuse me sir...you may disparage my person if you wish, but it is untoward to swear in front of a lady." "♥♥♥♥ you ♥♥♥♥♥♥!" I smile quietly and tip my fedora low across my eyes, concealing them "As you wish..." I quickly swing my cane into his kneecap before he can react he bellows and charges forward I expertly sidestep him and the cashier screams as he crashes into the counter I draw my sword-cane and mutter a quiet oath as I drive it deep into his back "...requiescat in pace..." As I clean my blade the girl walks out from behind the counter, twirling her hair with her fingers "So...maybe you'd like to come over to my place to play that game sometime...? "No thanks, milady, it's only single player. Besides..." I sheath my sword "You're not my type." skate away on my Heelys
January 2021

Classic

Kripp you promised to start a cooking show soon

twitchquotes: Hey Kripparino riparino, I know you love your Hearthstone but you promised your loving father that you would start a cooking show soon. The gig is up, after this game you must Gordon Ramsay us one splendarino disharoni.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
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