[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
I used to be a real ad
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I’m hoping Seraphine DIES xD

twitchquotes: I’m hoping Seraphine DIES xD I’m a Seraphine HATER because she’s so cute and EVIL! People get so trolled by her beat drop and her voice lines are SATANIC, like the one about high school! She’s super DEGENERATE but also smarter than she looks, just like SATAN as a kid XD
twitch chat
November 2020

League of Legends

Joker fursona bodyguard

twitchquotes: Okay CLEARLY sakurai is playing favorites already wtf. Joker is literally bayo, cloud, olimar put together. He gave him a GUN for gods sake and you LMFAO you can’t even hurt his fursona bodyguard ohmygod
twitch chat
April 2019

Super Smash Bros

Think about your actions

twitchquotes: I have noticed that, although this subreddit has 179,776 readers, I am not receiving 179,776 upvotes on my posts. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to click 'upvote'. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to upvote my most recent posts. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
twitch chat
September 2018

Classic

Fortnite represents life

twitchquotes: Fortnite represents life. We drop anywhere on the map, in the real world we drop out of a uterus. the battle royale is the struggle of life. and the loss is being arrested. the dub is killing everyone in the school successfully.
twitch chat
June 2019

Fortnite

C9 is losing the team fight on the point uncontested

twitchquotes: LEARN PLAT CHAT! C9 is losing the team fight on the point uncontested during overtime But alot of players now say C9 when they WIN a point and losing the fight when the time runs out.
twitch chat
May 2018
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

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