[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Kripp doesn't topdeck, cards just manifest in his hand

twitchquotes: Stop it guys, Kripp doesn't topdeck cards, they just manifest in his hand, only his opponents draw from the top of their decks Kappa
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February 2015
Kripp

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This offends me as a...

twitchquotes: This offends me as a vegan transgender hipster Native-American-Indo-Chinese hybrid alien agnostic-atheist German engineer who vapes fairtrade organic decaffeinated compressed and hydrated extra-protein soy breast milk on the regular and does Hindi Kama Sutra naked crossfit yoga 8 days a week.
twitch chat
June 2017

Blessings to you, Oh Salty One

twitchquotes: Blessings to you, Oh Salty One. This is Pope Francis, leader of the Catholic Church. My son, why do you avoid choosing Priest for your arena runs? Are you so afraid of attaining Salvation? It worries me that you prefer playing the murderous rogue or the destructive mage to the humble priest. You have sinned much already through your veganism, but atonement can be reached through more Priest runs. Thank you and God Bless.
twitch chat
July 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

You've gotten too popular too fast

twitchquotes: gachiGASM =/̵͇̿̿/'̿'̿̿̿ ̿ ̿ monkaS You've gotten too popular too fast. There's only room for one emoticon in this chat
twitch chat
February 2017

Classic

Fortnite default dance 2

⠀⠀⠀⣀⣶⣀ ⠀⠀⠀⠒⣛⣭ ⠀⠀⠀⣀⠿⣿⣶ ⠀⣤⣿⠤⣭⣿⣿ ⣤⣿⣿⣿⠛⣿⣿⠀⣀ ⠀⣀⠤⣿⣿⣶⣤⣒⣛ ⠉⠀⣀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣭⠉ ⠀⠀⣭⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿ ⠀⣶⣿⣿⠛⠀⣿⣿ ⣤⣿⣿⠉⠤⣿⣿⠿ ⣿⣿⠛⠀⠿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣤⠀⣿⣿⠿ ⠀⣿⣿⣶⠀⣿⣿⣶ ⠀⠀⠛⣿⠀⠿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⣉⣿⠀⣿⣿ ⠀⠶⣶⠿⠛⠀⠉⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⠿
November 2018

Fortnite Default Dance

Fortnite

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