[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Okay, listen up mods. I’m done with your oppressiveness

twitchquotes: Okay, listen up mods. I’m done with your oppressiveness. I try day in and day out to spam dank copy-pasta in chat and what do I get in return? Just the same old, 10 minute time out from you fun-suckers. Chat is filled with just meaningful dialogue and constructive feedback. I’m done. I’m out. And I swear to god, don’t even think about deleting this message.
twitch chat
February 2017

MODS

Valiant calls Shanghai

twitchquotes: HELLO SHANGHAI 📞 4Head IT'S THE VALIANT 📞 4Head WE'LL TAKE IT FROM HERE 📞 4Head
twitch chat
March 2019
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

Jared and Jock E-Athelete bullies

twitchquotes: Jared shuffles to his locker wiping a tear from his eye. He looks over his shoulder to see DOM and QT, the jock E-Athlete bullies, laughing at him and his wedgie. Jared clinches his fist in rage knowing that soon the time would come, he will show them...
twitch chat
May 2016
imaqtpie

Boosted Animal Jared

League of Legends

EA Sports

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February 2021

ANY LOSERS? v2

: ⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⡔⠙⠢⡀⠄⠄⠄⢀⠼⠅⠈⢂⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⡌⠄⢰⠉⢙⢗⣲⡖⡋⢐⡺⡄⠈⢆⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⡜⠄⢀⠆⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⢡⢣⢿⡱⡀⠈⠆⠄⠄ ⠄⠧⠤⠂⠄⣼⢧⢻⣿⣿⣞⢸⣮⠳⣕⢤⡆⠄⠄ ⢺⣿⣿⣶⣦⡇⡌⣰⣍⠚⢿⠄⢩⣧⠉⢷⡇⠄⠄ ⠘⣿⣿⣯⡙⣧⢎⢨⣶⣶⣶⣶⢸⣼⡻⡎⡇⠄⠄ ⠄⠘⣿⣿⣷⡀⠎⡮⡙⠶⠟⣫⣶⠛⠧⠁⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠘⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⡀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣯⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣷⡄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⠏⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣏⢾⠇⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡼⠿⠿⢿⣿⣦⡝⣿⣿⣿⠷⢀⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡇⠄⠄⠄⠈⠻⠇⠿⠋⠄⠄⢘⡆ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠱⣀⠄⠄⠄⣀⢼⡀⠄⢀⣀⡜⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣉⠉⠉⠄⢀⠈⠉⢏⠁⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡰⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⠄⠄⢸⣧⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣧⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⠄⠄⡘⣿⡆⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢀⣼⣿⡙⣷⡄⠄⠄⠄⠃⠄⢠⣿⢸⣿⡀ ⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣷⣝⠿⡀⠄⠄⠄⢀⡞⢍⣼⣿⠇ ⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠄⠠⡊⠴⠋⠹⡜⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⣤⣾⣿⣿⣧⠹⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢃⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠐⡏⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠄⢸⠛⠿⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠹⡖⠒⠒⠒⠒⠊⢹⠒⠤⢤⡜⠁⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠱⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸
November 2020

NSFW

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