[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Great job Mods. I am rooting for you always!

twitchquotes: Hey Mods, I hope you can see this message now that the chat has died down. I wanted to say congrats! I know it's hard to manage a TwitchTV chat but I always want to tip my hat off to you guys. Through thick and thin I will still be here to always support you. I know times are hard, but you always come back with a good attitude. I wish you the very best on your next timeouts, and hope you get an even better ban score. I will continue to be here and find new TOS violations as always. Great job Mods. I am rooting for you always! You should be proud.
twitch chat
November 2014

MODS

Negatron Cloak

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣤⣴⣶⠞⠛⢶⣤⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⡶⠿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠁⣰⠇⣈⠻⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢠⣾⣿⡗⢿⣶⣶⣤⣴⣾⠟⢠⡏⠄⠄⠈⠙⠿⣿⣿⣷⣦⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⠇⢶⣤⣀⡺⠿⠋⣠⡾⠄⠄⢤⣶⣤⣄⠈⠛⢿⣿⣷⡄⠄ ⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣣⣿⣷⣌⡛⢿⣿⣾⡟⠁⢤⣤⣀⠙⢿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠙⢿⣷⠄ ⠄⣼⣿⣿⣳⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⢭⣶⣇⠄⠻⣿⣧⡀⠙⢿⣿⣷⣦⡀⠙⠇ ⢰⣿⣿⣳⣿⣿⣻⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠹⣿⣿⣄⠄⠹⣿⣿⣴⡄⠄ ⢸⡿⣱⣿⣿⣏⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠘⣿⣿⣦⠄⠈⢿⡿⣱⣿ ⠘⣵⣿⣿⣿⣸⣿⣿⢾⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄⡜⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠁⣿⡿ ⢸⣶⣍⢿⢧⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠘⡜⣿⣷⣴⣦⣀⠘⠄ ⠄⠻⣿⢇⣾⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⡯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠘⡽⡟⢫⣴⣶⡆⠄ ⠄⠄⠙⢷⣿⡭⠡⠆⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠻⠄⢫⠄⣀⡹⣿⡇⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠃⠄⢀⣚⣭⣭⣭⡍⠄⣿⣿⣿⡿⢟⣛⣂⠄⣼⡿⣣⡟⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣁⣀⣈⣩⣭⣶⣿⣿⣿⣷⣭⡶⠋⠄⠄⠄
January 2021

League of Legends

Teamfight Tactics

This guy's DDOS is crazy

twitchquotes: ☑ “This guy's DDOS is CRAZY!” ☑ “My ISP can't win against a DDOS like that” ☑ "He NEEDED precisely this IP to win" ☑ “He used the only DDOS site the that could beat me” ☑ "He had the perfect program” ☑ “There was nothing I could do” ☑ “I streamed that perfectly"!!!
twitch chat
January 2015

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

God I wish Winston was real

twitchquotes: God I wish Winston was real. I want him to sit on my face with his furry ass. I want him to yell "THE POWER OF SCIENCE" as he thrusts into me. I want him to spam "OH YEAH" when we're finished. God if Blizzard made life-sized cutouts of Winston I would buy them all for myself and keep them in my basement for my pleasure. God I wish Winston was real.
twitch chat
March 2018

Overwatch

not an asexual thing

twitchquotes: ‘not an asexual thing’. try living a day in my shoes, walking around terrified of encountering sex everywhere i go. wherever i look, parents with children, people sucking each others’ faces. it makes me and millions of other aces out there feel really attacked.
twitch chat
February 2019

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing