[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

BOTH ULTIMATE AND MELEE ARE HYPE

twitchquotes: FeelsGoodMan BOTH ULTIMATE AND MELEE ARE HYPE FeelsGoodMan BOTH ULTIMATE AND MELEE ARE HYPE FeelsGoodMan BOTH ULTIMATE AND MELEE ARE HYPE
twitch chat
February 2019

Super Smash Bros

forsenpepE

⠄⣾⠟⢋⣉⣙⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄ ⣶⠏⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣌⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠄ ⣿⣴⠟⣋⣩⣭⣭⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⢛⣉⣉⣉⡙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄ ⣿⢁⣾⣿⣿⣿⣯⣛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣤⡾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⠉⠻⣿⣷ ⣿⠘⠋⠉⠉⣉⣉⣉⡙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⣴⣾⣥⣶⣶⣤⣍⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠘⠁⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⡷⠂⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠘⠛⠛⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⣿ ⣿⡄⠄⣀⣀⣚⣛⣉⣥⡴⠾⠿⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⡋⠄⠄⣀⠉⠛⠿⢿⠟⣸⣿ ⣿⣿⣄⠛⠿⠟⢻⣿⣡⣴⡶⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣌⡙⠿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⢋⣽⣿⠟⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣶⣦⣶⣿⣿⣮⣭⣶⣿⣿ ⣿⡿⠏⣁⣀⢔⠿⠋⡏⢸⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠉⣰⣟⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣶⠞⣉⣁⣉⣁⣈⡀⠘⠛⠛⠉⣤⣚⣛⣙⣋⣻⣇⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠁⣼⡟⠻⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣄⣀⣉⣉⣉⣉⡛⢻⣀⣿⣿⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣦⡈⠻⢷⣤⣙⠒⠶⢤⣭⣭⣭⣭⠍⢉⣩⣾⡿⠈⣿⣿⣿⣦⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣈⡛⠻⠿⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠚⣛⣉⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⠿⢛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢿⠟⣽⢿⣿⣿⣿⠻⠶⡶⢶⠲⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢿⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋
November 2021
Forsen

Emote

i didnt fuck my cat emojified

twitchquotes: i🙋‍♂️didn’t 🚫 fuck 🍆💦my cat😾. i didnt 🚫cum 🍆💦on my cat😼 . i didnt❌ put 👉 my Dick 🍆 anywhere 🌎near my cat🙀 . Ive never ❌🙅‍♀️done anything weird ❓❓❓with my 💁‍♂️😻cats. I promised🤝 myself 🤞i wasnt going to make 💢💢apology 😿 videos📹 after last years📅 thing so im just trying to be as short and honest 👍 with this 👅😼as possible. (1/?)
twitch chat
March 2019

Emoji Pasta

Based on fucking what? BASED ON FUCKING WHAT?

Based on fucking what? BASED ON FUCKING WHAT? You fucking cunt, you motherfucker. All I read is "based based based cringe cringe based", can't you fucking come up with anything else? It feels as if I'm talking to people with fucking dementia or something and they keep repeating the same fucking words on loop. BASED ON FUCKING WHAT??? THE BIBLE? THE OXFORD DICTIONARY? MY HAIRY ASSHOLE? OH my God just shut the fuck up it's like you can't form a coherent sentence without using one of these saturated, retarded words that lost all meaning overtime. "BASED BASED BASED CRINGE CRINGE WOKE REDPILL CRINGE WOKE GO FUCK YOURSELF YOU LITTLE BITCH YOU CUNT YOU FUCking asshole you bitch you cunt little shit Based? Based on what? On your dick? Please shut the fuck up and use words properly you fuckin troglodyte, do you think God gave us a freedom of speech just to spew random words that have no meaning that doesn't even correlate to the topic of the conversation? Like please you always complain about why no one talks to you or no one expresses their opinions on you because you're always spewing random shit like poggers based cringe and when you try to explain what it is and you just say that it's funny like what? What the fuck is funny about that do you think you'll just become a stand-up comedian that will get a standing ovation just because you said "cum" on the stage? HELL NO YOU FUCKIN IDIOT, so please shut the fuck up and use words properly you dumb bitch
December 2021

Based

DAPPER NO

twitchquotes: smallcat why are you so small FeelsGoodMan mellow why are you so cute FeelsGoodMan Lisha i love you FeelsGoodMan DAPPER NO FeelsBadMan
twitch chat
July 2017
imaqtpie
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