[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Doug Dimmadome, owner of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome

My name is Doug Dimmadome, owner of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome! Doug Dimmadome, owner of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome? That’s right, Doug Dimmadome, owner of the Dimmsdale Dimmadome!
April 2021

My kids were listening to Lil Nas X

My kids were listening to old town road by Lil Nas X and one of my kids asked me doesn’t he worship satan? Thinking face I said yes son sadly he does. I had to turn on No role modelz by J Cole to cheer him up My kids idolize someone better now! Thank you J Cole you’re a life saver!
April 2021

Molediver Hypers

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠉⢿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠋⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠋⠉⠉⠛⠻⣿⣿⠃⣾⡇⢸⣿⠟⢡⡆⢸ ⡿⠿⡏⢸⣇⢹⣿⠟⠛⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⣴⡿⠋⢥⡀⠈⠻⢰⣿⡇⠸⠏⣴⣿⠄⣼ ⠄⡄⠁⢸⣿⡄⠏⠄⡆⠘⡄⠄⠄⠈⣭⣵⣿⡎⣅⣠⡤⠘⠟⣡⣶⣶⣍⠋⠄⡙ ⠄⣿⠄⢘⣋⣃⠄⢀⣿⠄⢃⠄⠄⠄⠙⠿⠟⠁⢹⣇⣀⣤⣤⣶⡤⠈⣿⡆⢠⡇ ⠄⡿⢰⣿⣿⣿⡧⢸⣿⡆⠞⣀⠄⣀⣀⣤⣴⣾⣿⡿⠿⠋⠉⢉⠠⣾⣿⣷⢸⢀ ⡀⠃⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⡇⢀⣨⣿⣿⡿⠟⢋⣉⡀⠰⣾⡄⠄⣿⡇⢹⣿⣿⠘⣼ ⣷⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣙⠿⠁⣿⠿⠋⡁⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣷⠈⠄⣀⣈⣁⣈⣉⠹⡀⣿ ⣿⡄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⢰⣶⣿⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢀⠁⣿ ⣿⡇⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠸⠛⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠻⠿⠋⣰⣧⠙⢿⣿⣿⠃⣸⢰⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⣠⣴⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⡤⢀⣴⡿⢨⣿ ⣿⣿⡄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⣠⣿⣿⡇⢸⣿ ⣿⣿⣇⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠈⠙⠛⠻⠿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠉⠁⠄⢺⣿⣿⣿⠇⢸⣿
February 2021

Teamfight Tactics

If you touched a slug it would die

twitchquotes: Hey Reynad you're so salty, if you touched a slug it would die
twitch chat
May 2015
Reynad

salty

Knight of Negativitironi

twitchquotes: <:::::[]=¤༼ ◉_◔༽凸 I am the knight of Negativitironi. Stand back foul positivitironi! <:::::[]=¤༼ ◉_◔༽凸
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing