[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

There was nothing I could do but donate

twitchquotes: ☑ “These Hafu nudes are CRAZY!” ☑ “My dick can't stay limp against nudes like that” ☑ "She NEEDED precisely those two nips to win" ☑ “She took the only nudes that could make me beat off” ☑ "She had the perfect muff" ☑ “There was nothing I could do but donate” ☑ “She cried profusely"

twitch chat

October 2014

Kripp's gotta hit up the bathroom

twitchquotes: "Give me a second, guys," Kripp says. "Gotta hit up the bathroom" He turns down the volume on his microphone, and immediately gives Dex a swift kick down the stairs. As Dex yelps loudly in pain, Kripp overturns the nearest chair, yelling "Fuck this game!" as loudly as he can. Rania tries to calm him down, but Kripp swiftly bodyslams her onto a glass coffee table. After taking a few deep breaths, Kripp wipes the blood off of his face, sits back down at his computer, and resumes his stream.

twitch chat

January 2018

Kripp

Classic

I have heard that "lol you must be fun at parties" at least a hundred times

FUCK YOU. I have heard that "lol you must be fun at parties" at least a hundred times. GET FUCKING ORIGINAL. Jesus fucking christ. Stop saying the same fucking thing over and over and over again. Just because you don't agree with me DOES NOT HAVE SHIT TO DO WITH PARTIES. What the fuck. Do you fucking fart at parties or something? If so I don't want to go to your shitty-ass parties in the first place. I'll stick to my wine and cheese dinners, you know, REAL FUCKING PARTIES. I downvoted you because not one thing you said was original. You're just a robot programmed to say these phrases over and over again to feel connected to 1s and 0s on the internet. You've never been to a party. That's why you say those things. WELL I'M FUCKING tired. of it. I'm tired. Say that to me one more fucking time and I will find you. I'm taking a stand. I am so sick of the stupid "parties" comeback. It's not fun. It's not clever. It's really fucking hurtful. Thanks a lot, dick. So what if you don't like what I said. Is that any reason to dismiss my entire comment and quote a little comeback. What's next, you're going to explain to me with crayons or call out my bullshit by how I overcomplicating things? If I see one more fucking party comment, I'm going to lose it. I'm going off the fucking chain and fucking report all you motherfuckers who think it's funny to comment about being fun at parties. Try me. I will do it. I will go STRAIGHT TO THE FUCKING TOP and then I'll be the one laughing while you beg for my mercy. Then you know what I'll say while you come to me crying and begging to die so you can stop the agony? I'll say "You must be fun at parties." So yeah, If you must know, I am pretty fun at parties. Not that you'll ever find out, dick.

August 2021

NaM with okay hand

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⡛⠛⠻⠟⠛⠛⠟⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⢫⣶⠛⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢻⣿⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⢱⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣆⣄⠄⠄⠈⢶⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡏⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⠦⠄⠄⠙⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠤⡽⣿⣿⡷⠛⢲⡂⢀⠄⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣇⠈⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣤⠈⣿⣮⣶⣾⡇⠄⠘⣿⣿⣿⠉⣀⣤⡀⠙⠄⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣧⡄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⡟⡀⡾⣽⣿⣿⡇⢠⡀⣿⣿⡇⠈⢿⣿⠏⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣦⡀⣆⡟⠁⠄⠖⠎⢻⣿⢧⣿⡇⣿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣈⠁⢠⣠⢾⣿⠏⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⡙⠓⣩⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

ascii art

January 2019

How come we can't ever invade a cool country (Generation Kill)

Look at this shit, how come we can't ever invade a cool country, like chicks in bikinis, you know, how come countries like that don't ever need Marines, I'll tell you why, it's lack of pussy that fucks countries up, lack of pussy is the root fucking cause of all global instability, if more hajis were getting quality pussy, there'd be no reason for us to come over and fuck em up like this, cause a nutbusting haji, is a happy haji.

March 2021

[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

There was nothing I could do but donate

Kripp's gotta hit up the bathroom

Classic

I have heard that "lol you must be fun at parties" at least a hundred times

NaM with okay hand

How come we can't ever invade a cool country (Generation Kill)

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