[Copypasta] Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear “we’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is “yes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeños, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019
I used to be a real ad
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BUT AT LEAST WE GOT FREEDOM

twitchquotes: CAN'T HANDLE A PANDEMIC 4Head CAN'T HANDLE PROTESTS 4Head CAN'T HANDLE OTHER REGIONS 4Head BUT AT LEAST WE GOT FREEDOM Pepega
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Heaven is the highest you can get

It's 4️⃣2️⃣0️⃣ today 😳😱but I'm not smoking weed 🌿🍁😴😏🚬 I'm smoking 💨😜 the Bible 😇😋🙏📕 because heaven ⬆️😍👐😂 is the highest you can get 🙌😤
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Space Invaders

░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░▄▄████▄▄░░░░░ ░░░▄██████████▄░░░ ░▄██▄██▄██▄██▄██▄░ ░░░▀█▀░░▀▀░░▀█▀░░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░▀▄░░░▄▀░░░░░ ░░░░▄█▀███▀█▄░░░░ ░░░█▀███████▀█░░░ ░░░█░█▀▀▀▀▀█░█░░░ ░░░░░░▀▀░▀▀░░░░░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░▄░▀▄░░░▄▀░▄░░░ ░░░█▄███████▄█░░░ ░░░███▄███▄███░░░ ░░░▀█████████▀░░░ ░░░░▄▀░░░░░▀▄░░░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░▄▄████▄▄░░░░░ ░░░██████████░░░░ ░░░██▄▄██▄▄██░░░░ ░░░░▄▀▄▀▀▄▀▄░░░░░ ░░░▀░░░░░░░░▀░░░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░░▄██▄░░░░░░░ ░░░░▄██████▄░░░░░ ░░░███▄██▄███░░░░ ░░░░░▄▀▄▄▀▄░░░░░░ ░░░░▀░▀░░▀░▀░░░░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░░░░▄░░░░░░░░ ░░░░░░░███░░░░░░░ ░░▄███████████▄░░ ░░█████████████░░ ░░█████████████░░ ░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░
September 2021

Come Down Kid (in Farsi)

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠋⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⢻⣿⠋⠉⠙⠻⠿⣿⠏⢻⣿ ⣿⡇⠸⠿⠏⠻⠿⠆⢸⣿⣿⡟⠰⠆⠘⠷⠴⠖⠂⠀⠴⠿⠇⢸⣿ ⣿⣧⣀⣀⣠⣄⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣷⣤⣶⣀⣀⣀⣤⣼⣄⣀⣀⣀⣼⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣟⣛⣙⣿⣙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣩⣹⣿⣿⣋⣻⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠻⣿⡇⠀⣿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣴⣿⡟⢿⣿⠛⣿⣧⠀⣿⡇⠀⣿⣅⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⢹⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠙⠛⠛⠁⣸⡟⠿⠿⡿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⠟⡟⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
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FitnessGram Pacer Test

The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.
September 2016

Classic

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