[Copypasta] This offends me as a...

twitchquotes: This offends me as a vegan transgender hipster Native-American-Indo-Chinese hybrid alien agnostic-atheist German engineer who vapes fairtrade organic decaffeinated compressed and hydrated extra-protein soy breast milk on the regular and does Hindi Kama Sutra naked crossfit yoga 8 days a week.
twitch chat
June 2017
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Kawaii Gun

โ€ฆ_โ€ฆ..____________________, , โ€ฆโ€ฆ/ KAWAII GUN `โ€”-___________โ€”โ€”_____] = = = = =(๏พ‰โ—•ใƒฎโ—•)๏พ‰*:๏ฝฅ๏พŸโœง โ€ฆ../_==o;;;;;;;;_______.:/ โ€ฆ..), โ€”-.(_(__) / โ€ฆ.// (..) ), โ€”โ€”โ€ โ€ฆ//___// ..//___// .//___//
October 2021

Weebs

Anime

Ben Brode and Tyrande

twitchquotes: Ben Brode twirls his fingers in Tyrande's soft dirty blue hair. "If I do this, will you make Elune great again?" Tyrande asks as she starts to undress. "Just do as I say and I'll give you the next Dr. Boom". Tyrande prepares her Cockbiter Weapon. She nods as Ben Brode takes out his 4 mana 7/7 and slams it into Tyrande's 0/5 tightwell. "BY ELUNE'S GRACE"! Tyrande screams. After Boom-botting for 3 seconds, "HAAHAAHAA! YOU HAVE BEEN PURIFIED!" Brode yells as he SCAMAZes all over Tyrande's face..
twitch chat
October 2016

Hearthstone

GUYS PLEASE HELP! I NEED HELP!

twitchquotes: WHEN I SAT DOWN โฌ‡๏ธ TO PEE ๐Ÿ’ฆ THERE WAS A BUG ๐Ÿž IN THE TOILET ๐Ÿšฝ BUT I THOUGHT ๐Ÿ’ญ IT WAS DROWNED ๐ŸŒŠ๐Ÿ‘ป โ“โ”โ“โ” N WHEN I GOT UP โฌ†๏ธ IT WASN'T โŒ THERE ๐Ÿ‘‰ IM SOBBING ๐Ÿ˜ญ IS IT IN MY FUCKING ๐Ÿ† BUTTHOLE ๐Ÿ‘โญ• WHERE IS ITโ‰๏ธโ‰๏ธโ‰๏ธ
twitch chat
August 2019

Emoji Pasta

I hate when people refer to orange juice as OJ

I hate when people refer to orange juice as OJ. Why OJ? Do you want to sound cool? Is it so much of a hustle to say orange juice? Do you abbreviate apple juice too? " Hey yeah, let me have some AJ?" - said by no one ever. I just think it sound annoying af. Edit: I don't have any issues with abbreviations, except for OJ as orange juice. Sorry if I offended some of you with sensitive feelings.
May 2022

I've never even watched The Simpsons

I am beyond fucking angry right now. As I type this message I can physically feel my muscles tensing and my blood pressure rising. Why the fuck would you call me a "simp"? I've never even fucking watched The Simpsons. Not one fucking episode. I hope you retract that statement, because i'd never refer to you as a dick for not watching Dick and Dom in da Bungalow.
December 2020
Text-to-Speech Playing