twitchquotes:
Two guys are in a boat with three cigarettes. They had no fire, so they threw one of the cigarettes overboard, and the entire boat became a cigarette lighter.
twitch chat
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
๏ผฆ๏ผก๏ผซ๏ผฅ๏ผฒ ๏ผฒ๏ผฉ๏ผง๏ผจ๏ผด ๏ผฉ๏ผฎ ๏ผด๏ผจ๏ผฅ ๏ผฐ๏ผต๏ผณ๏ผณ๏ผน
twitchquotes:
๏ผฆ๏ผก๏ผซ๏ผฅ๏ผฒ ๏ผฒ๏ผฉ๏ผง๏ผจ๏ผด ๏ผฉ๏ผฎ ๏ผด๏ผจ๏ผฅ ๏ผฐ๏ผต๏ผณ๏ผณ๏ผน
twitch chat
ognglobal
we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce
gf is prego
we like to get kinky anyways
one night things get particularly saucy
i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird fucking chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights
wtf it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period
i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering
ohshitohshitohshitohshit
i rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital
she's still bleeding everywhere
by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much anymore, but all the color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent
oh shit, she looks like she's in a vegetative state
storm into to the emergency room, cary her to the nearest doctor and explain eveything
he takes one look at ther and says
"sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do"
"WHY THE FUCK NOT???"
"we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce"
Classic
Amogus Army
๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ๐นแฏ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ๐นแฏ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ
๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ๐นแฏ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ๐นแฏ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ
๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ๐นแฏ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ๐นแฏ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ
๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ๐นแฏ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ๐นแฏ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ ๐เถ ๐ฑเถ ๐เถ
Among Us / Amogus
Dear streamer, I will be joining the doubters
twitchquotes:
๐ โ๏ธ 
๐๐ฎ๐ช๐ป [streamer name] , ๐ ๐ป๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ป๐ฎ๐ฝ๐ฏ๐พ๐ต๐ต๐ ๐๐ฒ๐ต๐ต ๐ซ๐ฎ ๐ป๐ฎ๐ผ๐ฒ๐ฐ๐ท๐ฒ๐ท๐ฐ ๐ฏ๐ป๐ธ๐ถ ๐ซ๐ฎ๐ฒ๐ท๐ฐ ๐ช ๐ซ๐ฎ๐ต๐ฒ๐ฎ๐ฟ๐ฎ๐ป ๐ช๐ท๐ญ ๐๐ฒ๐ต๐ต ๐ซ๐ฎ ๐ณ๐ธ๐ฒ๐ท๐ฒ๐ท๐ฐ ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ฎ ๐ญ๐ธ๐พ๐ซ๐ฝ๐ฎ๐ป๐ผ ๐ฒ๐ท ๐ญ๐ธ๐พ๐ซ๐ฝ๐ฒ๐ท๐ฐ ๐๐ธ๐พ๐ป ๐ช๐ซ๐ฒ๐ต๐ฒ๐ฝ๐ฒ๐ฎ๐ผ.
๐๐ฎ๐ช๐ป [streamer name] , ๐ ๐ป๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ป๐ฎ๐ฝ๐ฏ๐พ๐ต๐ต๐ ๐๐ฒ๐ต๐ต ๐ซ๐ฎ ๐ป๐ฎ๐ผ๐ฒ๐ฐ๐ท๐ฒ๐ท๐ฐ ๐ฏ๐ป๐ธ๐ถ ๐ซ๐ฎ๐ฒ๐ท๐ฐ ๐ช ๐ซ๐ฎ๐ต๐ฒ๐ฎ๐ฟ๐ฎ๐ป ๐ช๐ท๐ญ ๐๐ฒ๐ต๐ต ๐ซ๐ฎ ๐ณ๐ธ๐ฒ๐ท๐ฒ๐ท๐ฐ ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ฎ ๐ญ๐ธ๐พ๐ซ๐ฝ๐ฎ๐ป๐ผ ๐ฒ๐ท ๐ญ๐ธ๐พ๐ซ๐ฝ๐ฒ๐ท๐ฐ ๐๐ธ๐พ๐ป ๐ช๐ซ๐ฒ๐ต๐ฒ๐ฝ๐ฒ๐ฎ๐ผ.
twitch chat
I want to fuck the Samsung girl
Oh my fucking god I want to fuck the Samsung Virtual assistant so fucking bad, every waking second of my fucking life since the release of that fucking ad Iโve done nothing but think about her. I canโt go for more that 2 seconds without getting an erection the size of the Burj Khalifa and ejaculating at Mach 12. Iโve ejaculated so many times to simply the thought of her existence that my cock is no longer cumming sperm but literal fucking blood. I canโt stoping thinking about her even after passing out from the pain of cumming blood. I canโt complete nearly any daily tasks because my mind is continuously invaded by her perfection, I canโt live every day of my life thinking about angelic voice screaming in luscious pain about the new Samsung data plan while I fuck her perfect 3D modeled asshole. My personal hell will only get worse in a matter of hours as I will scavenge every corner of the internet in search of her rule 34 and my continuous stream of blood cum will only get worse as Iโll spend days, weeks, possibly months jacking off to her non-stop for any reason other than to shit, piss and eat. Simply at this point alone in writing this Iโve lost 2-3 liters of blood alone with just the simple thought of her existence. If this is how I die then I wouldnโt want it any other way.