[Copypasta] I'm sorry for the comments I made. Please unban me

twitchquotes: I'm sorry for the comments I made. They were far beyond the point of being considered appropriate. You are an incredible person & me having been under the influence of alcohol is no excuse for allowing my behaviour to continue for as long as it did. I swear by God's gracious gift of free will that if you ever allow me to be an active member of your community again I will never follow the precedent I'd set for myself leading up to your rational decision to ban me. i think you're really cool.
twitch chat
January 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

3rd world countries like Sweden and Germany

twitchquotes: As I sit here in the land of freedom and glory, soaring on the wings of the bald eagle; I look down at the earth below me. Soaring over the crystal waters of the US Ocean toward 3rd world counties like Sweden and Germany, I am reminded that not everyone was lucky enough to be born into greatness. A single tear is shed as I weep at the thought of Denmark and Norway and the poverty they endure. The tear falls
twitch chat
October 2014

EU vs NA

Can't focus on sex with the Food Network on

twitchquotes: I’m married and have a 4 year old so sex needs to be done in window opportunities. Whatever channel the TV is on in the background is what it’s going to be. Food Network is the hardest to have sex to by far. So if for example Guy Fieri Triple D comes on and I hear β€œwe’re going to Seattle for some funky BBQ fish empanadas” while having sex my brain is β€œyes sex! But those empanadas sound crazy...dude focus on sex....that’s a shit load of jalapeΓ±os, that would give me heartburn for a week....Ok back to focusing on the sex....oh shit he’s going to a bbq pit in Austin next that does burnt tips in white cheddar Mac and Cheese!!! I gotta wrap this up”
twitch chat
May 2019

You have been gifted FREE COCK

twitchquotes: β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€” TwitchVotes You have been gifted FREE COCK. Type YEP to activate now. β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”
twitch chat
February 2021

you will never be on my intellectual level

twitchquotes: listen until you guys have read fichte, kant, schelling, hegel, goethe, novalis and hamann in the original german, you will never be on my intellectual level, you are plebs who are addicted to reddit and think rick and morty is a deep show, your children will be dysgenic losers and mine will be serious winners and well-educated, they'll probably smack the glasses off your children for fun and then go read homer in the original greek.
twitch chat
August 2020

With this dust of a Dorito chip, I use this chant to summon Kripp!

twitchquotes: (぀‒̀α΄₯‒́)぀*:ο½₯゚✧ With this dust of a Doritoβ„’ chip, I use this chant to summon Kripp! (぀‒̀α΄₯‒́)぀*:ο½₯゚✧
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing