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How to kill a geologist
Disclaimer: my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one for some reason, it would be very easy.
I’d brandish my obsidian knife at them and they’d be compelled to approach. “That’s very cool,” they’d say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the rocks they carry around at all times. They’d shower me with very interesting facts about obsidian and hover just out of range of the cutting edge, waiting for me to exhaust myself. “But as it is volcanic glass, it’s very fragile, you see, and isn’t well-suited for use as a weap—” and then I’d hit them with the wooden baseball bat in my other hand, which they would not have noticed because geologists can only see rocks and minerals.
Disclaimer: my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one for some reason, it would be very easy.
I’d brandish my obsidian knife at them and they’d be compelled to approach. “That’s very cool,” they’d say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the rocks they carry around at all times. They’d shower me with very interesting facts about obsidian and hover just out of range of the cutting edge, waiting for me to exhaust myself. “But as it is volcanic glass, it’s very fragile, you see, and isn’t well-suited for use as a weap—” and then I’d hit them with the wooden baseball bat in my other hand, which they would not have noticed because geologists can only see rocks and minerals.
It's EXAM WEEK
twitchquotes:It's EXAM WEEK 😤😤 and it's TIME ⏱⏱ to WHIP OUT 😯😯 your EDUCATION ERECTIONS 🎒📚🍆🍆 and FUCK THESE FINALS 🤣🤣😉😉. That's RIGHT, get READY to BOOTYCALL 🍑📞 your SLUTTY STUDY BUDDIES 😏😏 and HIT 👊👊 the BOOKS 📘📗📙till your BRAIN 🧠🧠 is RUBBED RAW 😫😫 and your PEN 🖊🖊is DRY 😵😵. So let's put the CUM in CUMULATIVE 💦💦 and do this THING 🙌🙌. Send this to 11 of the SKANKIEST 🤤🤤 SCHOLARS you know or you will LITERALLY get F'D! 😱😱
It's EXAM WEEK 😤😤 and it's TIME ⏱⏱ to WHIP OUT 😯😯 your EDUCATION ERECTIONS 🎒📚🍆🍆 and FUCK THESE FINALS 🤣🤣😉😉. That's RIGHT, get READY to BOOTYCALL 🍑📞 your SLUTTY STUDY BUDDIES 😏😏 and HIT 👊👊 the BOOKS 📘📗📙till your BRAIN 🧠🧠 is RUBBED RAW 😫😫 and your PEN 🖊🖊is DRY 😵😵. So let's put the CUM in CUMULATIVE 💦💦 and do this THING 🙌🙌. Send this to 11 of the SKANKIEST 🤤🤤 SCHOLARS you know or you will LITERALLY get F'D! 😱😱
One chat, under Kripp, unbannable, with OJ and BM for all
twitchquotes:ヽ༼☑ل͜☑༽ノ I pledge allegiance to the chat of the United States of Kripparian, and to the Spammerino for which it stands, one chat, under Kripp, unbannable, with OJ and BM for all ヽ༼☑ل͜☑༽ノ
ヽ༼☑ل͜☑༽ノ I pledge allegiance to the chat of the United States of Kripparian, and to the Spammerino for which it stands, one chat, under Kripp, unbannable, with OJ and BM for all ヽ༼☑ل͜☑༽ノ
Wait Aurateur is actually bald?
twitchquotes:I’ve been blind since birth. After restorative eye surgery I got a new lease on life. I can drive, watch TV, see the sunset. But more importantly, I can finally truly watch my favorite twitch streamer, Aurateur. From the sounds of it he is a god gamer and the chat is so rambunctious it’s always a good time. Alright, time to log into twitch and see what he’s up to........ Wait this guy is actually bald? lmao I’m outta here
I’ve been blind since birth. After restorative eye surgery I got a new lease on life. I can drive, watch TV, see the sunset. But more importantly, I can finally truly watch my favorite twitch streamer, Aurateur. From the sounds of it he is a god gamer and the chat is so rambunctious it’s always a good time. Alright, time to log into twitch and see what he’s up to........ Wait this guy is actually bald? lmao I’m outta here
Drunk children live outside
twitchquotes:Hello Reynad my name is Dennis, and I am 12. I drink 3 beers per day because of your stream. Mom said I am going to leave outside like a dog because drunk children live outside. I am sad. please help me.
Hello Reynad my name is Dennis, and I am 12. I drink 3 beers per day because of your stream. Mom said I am going to leave outside like a dog because drunk children live outside. I am sad. please help me.