[Copypasta] This is exactly why I LOVE Twitch chat

twitchquotes: This is exactly why I LOVE Twitch chat. This chat is pure, adulterated, 100% intelligence. Everybody has a single unique, new thought, all spouting the latest meme after meme, that are really good. THIS is why I'm turning off the professional gameplay and will just watch the chat. And I swear to god, if any of you don't copy and paste this, I'm deleting my account forever.
twitch chat
December 2016
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Nesquik cereal box

April 2021

NSFW

Dear Kripp, this is you from the future!

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, this is you from the future!!! The fate of Earth depends on YOU! When you ignored chat and didn't place the kitty on your lap and pet it, it lead to a global economic crash and all out nuclear war!! For the love of humanity put the damn kitty in your lap now and pet it like our lives depend on it!!!!! Sincerely , Future Kripp
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

GME stock and WSB vs short sellers

Let me tell you what happens tomorrow because it's even worse than what happened today. There they are, Melvin Capital. Furiously jerking their 2 inch boomer cocks to their GME short gainz. They are so close, edging themselves with "Oh yeah, the next Blockbuster" and "Yes baby, brick and mortar go bye-bye." They even sit in a circle sucking and jerking each other off, double fisting like they're skiing down Mt. Everest with cocks instead of poles. Out of nowhere, Ryan Cohen steps in with the most massive and vieniest schlong they've ever seen. He starts eating their lunch and muttering about Cheey for games and they can't do anything because their engorged penises are stuck in eachothers mouths and poop chutes. They attempt to ignorr him and try to keep jerking but they accidentally used hand sanitizer instead of lotion. BAM GME starts rising from the ashes and the retards of WSB are lighting the fires. We brought lighters that we borrowed from our wives boyfriend's and they weren't those shitty clear one. We have motherfucking Bics and torches. Melvin is crying and pleading but we are too retarded to understand coherent English. They see giant red dildos on their screens and their buttholes begin to pucker. They dump everything they have at us in an attempt to supress the price but again, we only understand broken english and emojis. We only understand basic visuals and colors. When we see green, we buy. When we see red, we take out another student loan or CC cash advance and we buy more. We are fucking unstoppable. GME skyrockets and they start scrambling to pull dicks out of random orifices, but it's too late. Bears R Fuk. After we are done splooging all over their faces, and becoming their wife's new boyfriends, we throw Melvin and BOA on the chopping block to be liquidated and disposed of. That's what happens tomorrow, and we are gonna turn that shit into a movie.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

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⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣴⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⡄⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢋⣵⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⣩⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣬⣙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣷⡍⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢹⠃⣠⣾⣿⣿⡿⢋⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠈⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡙⣿⣿⣿⢦⡀⢣⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⡿⠀⡯⠊⣡⣿⣿⠏⣴⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⣀⣤⣤⠀⣤⣤⡀⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣌⢻⣿⣧⡉⠺⡄⢸⠹⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠃⢷⠀⡠⢺⣿⣿⡏⣰⣿⣿⡟⠁⣠⣾⣿⣿⠿⠀⠿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠘⣿⣿⣿⡄⣿⣿⣯⠢⡀⢸⠀⢹⣿ ⣿⣿⠀⢸⠊⣠⣿⣿⣿⢀⣿⣿⣿⠁⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣹⣿⣿⣦⠈⢺⠀⢸⣿ ⣿⠹⡆⠀⣴⢻⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⠀⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⢿⣿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⡇⢈⣿⣿⣿⠀⣿⣿⣿⠳⡀⢀⡇⢸ ⣿⡀⠹⣸⠉⣿⣿⡿⢋⣠⣿⣿⣿⡀⠸⠟⢋⣀⢠⣾⣿⣷⡀⣀⡙⠻⠁⢸⣿⣿⣿⣈⠻⣿⣿⡄⠹⡜⠀⣸ ⣿⢧⠀⠇⢠⣿⣿⣷⡘⣿⣿⣿⣟⣁⡀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠀⣠⣉⣿⣿⣿⡿⢠⣿⡿⢧⠀⠁⣰⢿ ⣿⡌⢷⡄⣾⠀⣿⣿⣷⡜⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣄⠈⠉⠛⠛⠛⠉⢁⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣰⣿⣿⡇⢸⢀⡴⠃⣼ ⣿⣷⣄⠙⢿⠀⣿⢿⣿⣿⣌⠿⠟⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠿⠟⣼⣿⡿⢫⠃⢸⠋⢀⣼⣿ ⣿⣿⣟⣶⣄⡀⢸⡀⢻⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣶⣍⣙⠛⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠛⣋⣥⣶⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⠁⣸⢀⣴⣶⣯⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠾⣧⠀⢯⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢫⠃⢠⢷⣛⣉⣽⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⣁⡈⢧⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⣠⢋⣀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣉⠉⠉⠉⣀⣀⡭⠟⠛⢛⣛⠛⠛⠛⣛⠛⠛⠩⣥⣀⣈⢁⢀⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣝⡛⢉⣁⣀⣤⠖⣫⣴⣿⣿⣷⣬⡙⣦⣤⣀⡈⣉⣩⣯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
January 2021

Kripparrian Lord of the Saltmen has returned to me

twitchquotes: ( ͡ᴏ ͜ʖ ͡ᴏ) I ᴡᴀʟᴋ ғᴏʀ ᴅᴀʏs, ʜᴀs ɪᴛ ʙᴇᴇɴ ᴍᴏɴᴛʜs. sᴏ ᴍᴀɴʏ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍᴇʀs ʙᴜᴛ ᴍʏ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ sᴛᴀʏs ʟᴏʏᴀʟ. ᴏɴᴇ ᴅᴀʏ ɪ ʟᴏᴏᴋ. ᴄᴀɴ ɪᴛ ʙᴇ sᴏ? ᴋʀɪᴘᴘᴀʀɪᴀɴ ʟᴏʀᴅ ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ sᴀʟᴛᴍᴇɴ ʜᴀs ʀᴇᴛᴜʀɴᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ. ɪ ᴀᴍ sᴏ ʜᴀᴘᴘʏ. ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ɴᴏ ᴄᴏᴘʏᴄʜɪɴᴏ ᴍᴀᴄʜᴘᴀᴘᴇʀɪɴᴏ. ( ͡ᴏ ͜ʖ ͡ᴏ)
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
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