You watch her as she brushes her hair. She’s humming a song you can’t quite hear and smiling to herself. Not for the first time, you wonder why this person chose you.
She turns. “What do you want for Christmas?” You want to scream Save your money!, but you only shrug. “Nothing, really.”
“Nothing?” She crawls into bed and touches your leg. “Are you sure?” Again, you wonder why this person chose you.
As she takes the weight of you in her hand, your mind wanders. To your puts. They’ll expire worthless, like you. After several minutes of failing to conjure your manhood, she asks, “What’s wrong?”
Stonks only go up.
But you don’t.
You watch her as she brushes her hair. She’s humming a song you can’t quite hear and smiling to herself. Not for the first time, you wonder why this person chose you.
She turns. “What do you want for Christmas?” You want to scream Save your money!, but you only shrug. “Nothing, really.”
“Nothing?” She crawls into bed and touches your leg. “Are you sure?” Again, you wonder why this person chose you.
As she takes the weight of you in her hand, your mind wanders. To your puts. They’ll expire worthless, like you. After several minutes of failing to conjure your manhood, she asks, “What’s wrong?”
Stonks only go up.
But you don’t.
I need Tesla to go $3k eoy
Ran out of condoms and told my gf I'm a pull out king. Went in raw and found out I'm king of shit. She now preggo and I need Tesla to go $3,000 eoy.
Choose your fighter
Alex Magikarp 🐟
Elon TechnoCuckLord 🤖+🤴
Jeff Divorcedzos 💔
Salmonella 🐔 Nutella 🍫
Bill "HELL Giga GUH is coming" Clownman 🤡
Chamath, "I'm abouta fuck shit up" Papaya 🍈
Ryan Cocken your butthole 🥒💦 👉👌😳
🥒 Z 🥒 U 🥒 C 🥒 C 🥒
Tim 🍎 Bottom 🅱️ENIS
Jack Ma MIA 🤷♂️
Cathie "A prayer a day keeps the 🐻s' away" or "Jesus, take my buying power" Woods 🙏✝️
Choose your fighter
Alex Magikarp 🐟
Elon TechnoCuckLord 🤖+🤴
Jeff Divorcedzos 💔
Salmonella 🐔 Nutella 🍫
Bill "HELL Giga GUH is coming" Clownman 🤡
Chamath, "I'm abouta fuck shit up" Papaya 🍈
Ryan Cocken your butthole 🥒💦 👉👌😳
🥒 Z 🥒 U 🥒 C 🥒 C 🥒
Tim 🍎 Bottom 🅱️ENIS
Jack Ma MIA 🤷♂️
Cathie "A prayer a day keeps the 🐻s' away" or "Jesus, take my buying power" Woods 🙏✝️