DONT COPY THE 
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More Classic Copypastas
Pickpocket hot tip
twitchquotes:
Hot tip: When someone yells pickpocket start searching for your wallet in the groin area and exclaim 'Thank God my wallet is safely tucked between my testicles'. The pickpocket will see this and assume that the wallet is there. These people usually have very supple and delicate hands so when they try to take your wallet you will instead get a pleasant fondling to your genital area.
twitch chat
Classic
Bikini Shrek
48 year man from somalia
twitchquotes:
Hello Kripp Aryan, am 48 year man from somalia. Sorry for my bed england.. I selled my wife for internet connection for play "heart of stone" and i want to become the goodest player like you. I play with 400 ping on US server and i am rakn 17. pls no copy pasterino my story
twitch chat
Kripp
Classic
Riot's MIGHT SPAGHETTI CODE of elo hell
twitchquotes:
IF YOU SEE THIS MESSAGE WHILE SCROLLING, Riot's MIͫ̈́G̅̄ͭͧ̑̋͆H̃̄̾̃ͨ͒T̈̐ͨ̋͊ͮY̍̄̈́ ͨ̅̈́S̃ͣ͋͗ͩP̅ͯ̊̏̌A͐̒G̿HÊ̐͌T͂̿̑ͫTͤͮͧI̾͊ͥ̋͊ ̃̌Cͦ̽OͬͦD̎̏E͊ͨ̊ͯ͐ͣ̆ ͗͋̉̆ͦ̽o̔̑̐͊̃̆f̓͌ͬ ̑ͩͣͤel̉o̒ͬ͗ͤ̚ ͤͯ͌ͩh̿ͤe͒̋̒̄lͪ̎̾́͊l̀͋̊̚ has leaked onto your computer. Bug splats and lost elo will come to you unless you COPY and PASTA this message 3 times
IF YOU SEE THIS MESSAGE WHILE SCROLLING, Riot's MIͫ̈́G̅̄ͭͧ̑̋͆H̃̄̾̃ͨ͒T̈̐ͨ̋͊ͮY̍̄̈́ ͨ̅̈́S̃ͣ͋͗ͩP̅ͯ̊̏̌A͐̒G̿HÊ̐͌T͂̿̑ͫTͤͮͧI̾͊ͥ̋͊ ̃̌Cͦ̽OͬͦD̎̏E͊ͨ̊ͯ͐ͣ̆ ͗͋̉̆ͦ̽o̔̑̐͊̃̆f̓͌ͬ ̑ͩͣͤel̉o̒ͬ͗ͤ̚ ͤͯ͌ͩh̿ͤe͒̋̒̄lͪ̎̾́͊l̀͋̊̚ has leaked onto your computer. Bug splats and lost elo will come to you unless you COPY and PASTA this message 3 times
twitch chat
Riot Games
Classic
League of Legends
Response to "go fuck yourself"
What if I'm already fucking myself? Behind this simple insult hides a universal paradox that may put your sexuality in question. Let's do a simple thought experiment: imagine us two standing in front of each other. I, of course, am wearing a pair of jeans, that are covering my genitals and my butt. You then command me to "go fuck myself". I may be fucking myself already. I may as well not be fucking myself already. Until my dick and its position relative to my ass is observed, it is simultaneously in my ass, but also outside of it - thus, it stays in superposition. The moment you lay eyes on my penis, both states collide with each other and become either one. You may have already guessed what the problem here is. As soon as a single photon reflected by my dick enters either one of your eyes, you become gay. The only way to avoid this is to not observe my penis. But if you don't look at it, then you will never know if your insult had any effect, thus rendering it meaningless. Since you have already made the insult, you are now, too, in superposition - you're either wrong, or gay. It's unfortunate, really - you dug a hole for yourself without even knowing it. All you can do now is accept it, and learn from your mistakes.