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I hate when people quote songs in their spam... it reminds me of Somebody I Used to Know
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More Copypastas
As a MOTHER, I am OUTRAGED
Doraemon
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Pickpocket hot tip
twitchquotes:
Hot tip: When someone yells pickpocket start searching for your wallet in the groin area and exclaim 'Thank God my wallet is safely tucked between my testicles'. The pickpocket will see this and assume that the wallet is there. These people usually have very supple and delicate hands so when they try to take your wallet you will instead get a pleasant fondling to your genital area.
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Classic
Bumper Ameng burger
twitchquotes:
Bumper stared at the burger in his hand. Normally, he loved chowing down on his Big Mac like he chowed on these beta tanks like Swon or Muma or Super. But not today. Today, this burger was a sign of his failure. The double patties of meat reminded him not of succulent juicy beef but only the mighty veiny vascular muscles of Ameng. The seeded bread buns? It was Ameng’s cheeks as he squatted on Bumper’s face. The tomato? It was his blood dripping off Ameng’s hammer. The mayo? You know what it is
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OverwatchLeague
Classic
Overwatch
📞 HELLO CHIPS? 📞 THE SPAWN HERE
twitchquotes:
📞 
HELLO CHIPS? 📞 THE SPAWN HERE 📞 YOU HAVEN'T DIED IN 10 SECONDS....YOU'RE OVERDUE
HELLO CHIPS? 📞 THE SPAWN HERE 📞 YOU HAVEN'T DIED IN 10 SECONDS....YOU'RE OVERDUE
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OverwatchLeague