[Copypasta] John "D" Dos, inventor of the DDOS

twitchquotes: Greetings Kripp, it is I, John "D" Dos, inventor of the DDOS. It has come to my attention that children are using my invention for malicious reasons. Please send me your address, phone number, credit card and social security numbers so I can help you fix this problem.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(
More Kripp Copypastas

Uranus is actually a planet in our solar system

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, Just got back from a 529 second time out, and while I waited for it, I was busy doing my homework when I found out Uranus is actually a planet in our solar system! How cool is that! Please share this valuable information with Kripp and Friends! I'd love for them to get some knowledge Please Copy Papaloonie!
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Scraggly vegan is the only one left

twitchquotes: BOB “You’re doing GREAT out there!” I exclaim with as much enthusiasm as I can this late in the day. The scraggly vegan is the only one left in the tavern, his attention focused entirely on the card game we put out to entertain children and toddlers. “I don’t wanna talk about it guys” cries the man, knocking his cup of vegan water over. I try to reassure him that everyone has bad luck now and then, but he just ignores me, as always. This tavern attracts some strange types indeed.
twitch chat
December 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

Genuine Kripp Smile

twitchquotes: Look at him, look at that smile. That's a genuine Kripp Smile™ there if I ever saw one. Now chat, if you pay close attention you'll realize that these rare, genuine demonstrations of happiness only actually happen when Kripp is playing Hearthstone. Not Artifact, not Magic, not anything else. Hearthstone is where Kripp's heart really is at. We just have to understand and support that, no matter what.
twitch chat
December 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

Art of Conquest is the best!

twitchquotes: (sponsored viewer): Hey Kripp! I just saw your Youtube video about Art of Conquest! It looks like such an amazing free game with a lot of wonderful content and replayablility. I was wondering you were going to play Art of Conquest on stream for us tonight? It would be a privilege to watch such a skilled gamer with a positive attitude such as yourself play this mind-bogglingly complex game. Thanks Kripp, you're the best - just like Art of Conquest!
twitch chat
September 2017
Kripp

sellout

Hello to you Kripparian. I am Rajkumar from India

twitchquotes: Hello to you Kripparian. HeyGuys I am Rajkumar from India. I am seeking your correspondence for an important business matter. However, when I attempt to chat with you, your unruly chat participants are continuously mock my english and repost my message over and over. Please contact me at your fast convience. Thank you my friend. ANELE
twitch chat
March 2016
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing