[Copypasta] I would like to inform you that I busted a huge nut to your shot

I would like to inform you that I busted a huge nut to your shot. My earth shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen anyone in the near vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or will ever produce, shot out so hard that it ripped my dick apart by my übernut accelerating to 7% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused my building to collapse, and every female in the city to fall pregnant with my children. As I lay dying under the rubble, I rest assured knowing every one of my sons will repeat this glorious act.
January 2024
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More Copypastas

Nice opinion, just one tiny problem with it

Nice opinion, just one tiny problem with it. Inspecting your post, it looks like your opinion is different from mine. Let me tell you something, I am the baseline for opinions. Any opinion I hold is objectively correct and as a result, any other opinions are wrong. Guess what? You happen to hold the wrong one! I hope you know that your opinion is now illegal. I have contacted the FBI, CIA, the NSA, the navy seals, secret service, and your mom! You'll be sorry you ever shared your opinions, by the time you're reading this, you'll be done for. Nature will punish you, humanity will punish you, space will punish you. We decided just to make sure we'll nuke your house from orbit. So there's no chance you can run away, everyone will know you will die. It's a small price to pay, to remove your wrong opinion from this world.
September 2021

Donald Trump answers what is 2+2?

Donald Trump answers the question: What is 2+2? "I have to say a lot of people have been asking this question. No, really. A lot of people come up to me and they ask me. They say, "What's 2+2"? And I tell them look, we know what 2+2 is. We've had almost eight years of the worst kind of math you can imagine. Oh my god, I can't believe it. Addition and subtraction of the 1s the 2s and the 3s. Its terrible. Its just terrible. Look, if you want to know what 2+2 is, do you want to know what 2+2 is? I'll tell you. First of all the number 2, by the way I love the number 2. It's probably my favorite number, no it is my favorite number. You know what, it's probably more like the number two but with a lot of zeros behind it. A lot. If I'm being honest, I mean, if I'm being honest. I like a lot of zeros. Except for Marco Rubio, now he's a zero that I don't like. Though, I probably shouldn't say that. He's a nice guy but he's like, "10101000101", on and on, like that. He's like a computer! You know what I mean? He's like a computer. I don't know. I mean, you know. So, we have all these numbers and we can add them and subtract them and add them. TIMES them even. Did you know that? We can times them OR divide them, they don't tell you that, and I'll tell you, no one is better at the order of operations than me. You wouldn't believe it. That I can tell you. So, we're gonna be the best on 2+2, believe me. OK? Alright. Thank you."
October 2016

Donald Trump

Crazy anime girl

⠄⠄⣠⠞⠁⢠⡞⣡⡴⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠛⠓⠶⣤⣙⢦⡙⢦⡀⠄⠄ ⢀⡔⠁⠄⣰⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⢿⣆⠙⡄⠄ ⠋⠄⠄⣼⡟⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⢷⡜⣆ ⠄⠄⣴⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣶⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣹⡏ ⢤⣰⠏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⢀⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⠟⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⣿⠉ ⠄⣼⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣿⣼⣉⣷⣤⡀⠄⠄⠄⣼⠏⠄⠹⠄⠙⣿⣦⠄⠄⣿⠄ ⠄⠛⡿⣧⠄⠄⢀⣴⠋⠿⠋⠻⣦⣝⠻⣦⣤⡾⢃⣠⡴⠆⠄⢸⠟⣿⣷⣄⡇⠄ ⠄⠄⡇⠹⣦⣀⣼⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢙⣻⣶⣿⣟⠛⠉⠄⠄⠄⢸⠄⡟⠘⠿⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⡇⠄⣿⢿⡇⣷⠄⠄⣠⣴⠾⠛⠋⠁⠈⠙⠛⠶⣤⡄⠄⢸⠄⢻⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢠⠇⠄⣿⣸⡇⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⡀⢸⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢸⠄⢸⣿⣿⡇⡇⠄⠄⠄⢠⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡀⠄⠄⢸⡇⢸⡄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢸⠄⣾⣿⣿⡇⣧⡀⠄⠄⠄⢿⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⡾⠃⠄⠄⣸⠃⠄⡇⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⡟⢀⣿⣿⣿⠇⣿⣷⣄⡀⠄⠄⠛⠷⢦⣴⠶⠟⠁⠄⣠⣾⣇⠄⠄⣿⠄⠄⠄ ⢠⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⢠⣿⣿⣿⡟⠲⢤⣀⡀⠄⠄⣀⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⢻⡇⠄⠄ ⣼⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣼⣿⣿⣿⣧⣤⣤⣤⣭⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣤⣼⣿⣤⣤
January 2019

Weebs

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March 2021

Coca Cola shortage

twitchquotes: THIS JUST IN: Stores across the world are reporting a major shortage of 'store brand Cola'. Sources indicate that over 20 million bottles were sold within minutes of an endorsement by some dirty Romanian living in Athens.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
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