Hey, quandale Pringle here,
My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer during work and he squeezed my hog so hard and wouldn't even stop after I banned him.
My brother Cornelius Bartholomew Anderson ringle got caught in an alberian twitch prime and bits scam and got sent to the gulag, but we've snuck him a Nokia 3310 in his ass with a spoon that he'll be using to plan a breakout with my cousin longsdale dimmsdimone slingle.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Hi Kripp, this is Pogoβs mom
twitchquotes:
Hi Kripp, this is Pogoβs mom. I noticed you havenβt been picking my son for your team in gym class. Pogo has been having a really tough time since his dad and I split up, and it doesnβt make it easy on him when you reroll and say, "Weβre never taking Pogo". I think you should take a hard look at yourself in the mirror and think how it would feel if someone said that about you. Pogo has mech synergy and can be combined into one big Pogo if you have 3! Why donβt you try being a bit more inclusive?
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
Donger
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Times change...
twitchquotes:
Laying on the ground, devastated by the news my beloved Kripp has joined TSM, a hooded figure approaches, kneels down, grabs me by the shoulder. βThis was not his destiny.β I said, holding back the tears. I look up, the stranger removes his hood and looks me in the eye, βTimes Changeβ¦β says Trump, as he pushes me to the ground. This wasnβt supposed to happen. 
twitch chat
Kripp
Twitch Should Ban The Term βLive-Streamingβ
twitchquotes:
Twitch Should Ban The Term βLive-Streamingβ. Itβs offensive to dead people. My great grandparents are dead and I would like to show them some respect and have twitch ban the term βlive-streamingβ. Itβs a slur used against dead people
twitch chat
Smartest Man in Existence
twitchquotes:
When I was in school I used to have an IQ of 15. My classmates used to harass me for not being that smart. But since 2013, my life has changed. My IQ is now 195 and it increases by 5 every time I sit down on Saturday nights to watch this one show. It is called Rick and Morty. Because of that, I get all the girls and people are always comparing me to Albert Einstein, some even say that I am the cure for cancer. When the government found out that I watch Rick and Morty, they showed up to my residence and took me to a secret facility to take an exam. The exam was about explaining all the jokes in Rick and Morty and I had to answer each question in all currently spoken languages. Since I watched Rick and Morty, I didn't have any problems and I completed it in 30 minutes. The next day, I got to see the results and I passed the exam with a score of 100%. They gave me the title "Smartest Man in Existence". Guess I am out of this world.
twitch chat