Hey, quandale Pringle here,
My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer during work and he squeezed my hog so hard and wouldn't even stop after I banned him.
My brother Cornelius Bartholomew Anderson ringle got caught in an alberian twitch prime and bits scam and got sent to the gulag, but we've snuck him a Nokia 3310 in his ass with a spoon that he'll be using to plan a breakout with my cousin longsdale dimmsdimone slingle.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Hi Toast this is Mrs. Laurent - Fiora's mom
twitchquotes:
Hi Toast this is Mrs. Laurent - Fiora's mom. I noticed you have been picking my girl for your team in gym class. Fiora has been having a really tough time since her dad and I split up, and I know how much it means to her. You could have been rerolling saying: "We're never taking Fiora." It warms my tired heart that you would show such kindness and give a struggling girl with a good, noble soul a chance. Bless you Toastfor never giving up on my dear little girl
twitch chat
DisguisedToast
Teamfight Tactics
Watch Kripp's stream as punishment
twitchquotes:
I'm typing this from prison where we are forced to watch Kripp stream as our punishment. If he gets to 12 wins we will all be let go. Otherwise we will be executed tomorrow morning. Please Kripp, we're all rooting for you 
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
greekWC emote
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Greekgodx
Comedy God has entered the building: Attack Helicopter
I Sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter
WEE WOO WEE WOO
ALERT! COMEDY GOD HAS ENTERED THE BUILDING! GET TO COVER!
steps on stage
Bystander: "Oh god! Don't do it! I have a family!"
Comedy God: "Heh..."
adjusts fedora
the building is filled with fear and anticipation
God and Jesus himself looks on in suspense
comedy god clears throat
everything is completely quiet not a single sound is heard
world leaders look and wait with dread
everything in the world stops
nothing is happening
comedy god smirks
no one is prepared for what is going to happen
comedy god musters all of this power
he bellows out to the world
"ATTACK"
absolute suspense
everyone is filled with overwhelming dread
"HELICOPTER"
all at once, absolute pandemonium commences
all nuclear powers launch their nukes at once
giant brawls start
43 wars are declared simultaneously
a shockwave travels around the earth
earth is driven into chaos
humanity is regressed back to the stone age
the pure funny of that joke destroyed civilization itself
all the while people are laughing harder than they ever did
people who aren't killed die from laughter
literally the funniest joke in the world
then the comedy god himself posts his creation to reddit and gets karma
Classic
SHOW YOUR KNEECAPS TO THE WORLD QTPIE
twitchquotes:
All my life has led to this one moment. It could happen. But it could also dissipate before my very eyes. This is it. This is MY DREAM. Show them to me Qtpie, fuck dude, SHOW THEM TO THE WORLD! KNEECAPS. We all know you have them. NOW GIVE THEM TO ME. Plz no copy pasterino....
twitch chat
imaqtpie