[Copypasta] My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer

Hey, quandale Pringle here, My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer during work and he squeezed my hog so hard and wouldn't even stop after I banned him. My brother Cornelius Bartholomew Anderson ringle got caught in an alberian twitch prime and bits scam and got sent to the gulag, but we've snuck him a Nokia 3310 in his ass with a spoon that he'll be using to plan a breakout with my cousin longsdale dimmsdimone slingle.
July 2022
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Tomato Town Police Report

The residents of Tomato Town need your help identifying two suspects who were about to get down while involved in an event on Monday evening. Ten people were eliminated, and the two suspects, one injured, left the scene headed Southbound and were later spotted at a local park. The two suspects were armed with golden scar ARs and were β€œhitting that chug jug” as several witnesses stated. Please alert local Tomato Town authorities with any information regarding the duo.
March 2021

Fortnite

Fapping to Reynad

twitchquotes: anyone else fap to reynad?
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad

Please try and make some new fresh pasta

twitchquotes: Guys, seriously? The somalian guy pasta? You disapoint me. I thought twitch had the dankest memes but i guess originality runs out fast. Pls try and make some new fresh pasta instead of insisting on a one year old meme. Thank you
twitch chat
April 2015
imaqtpie

Doge

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–β–“β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–„β–“β–β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–β–“β–“β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–€β–„β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–€β–„β–“β–“β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–€β–„β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–€β–‘β–“β–Œβ–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–„β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–“β–β–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–ˆβ–Œβ–“β–“β–“β–€β–€β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–„β–€β–“β–“β–β–ˆ β–β–ˆβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–‘β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–€β–„β–‘β–€β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ–ˆβ–Œ β–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–β–‘β–‘β–„β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–„β–€β–β–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–ˆβ–“β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–β–ˆβ–Œ β–“β–„β–Œβ–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–β–€β–ˆβ–„β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–Œβ–ˆ
ascii art
November 2014
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Text-to-Speech Playing