[Copypasta] My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer

Hey, quandale Pringle here, My boss caught me watching a hottub streamer during work and he squeezed my hog so hard and wouldn't even stop after I banned him. My brother Cornelius Bartholomew Anderson ringle got caught in an alberian twitch prime and bits scam and got sent to the gulag, but we've snuck him a Nokia 3310 in his ass with a spoon that he'll be using to plan a breakout with my cousin longsdale dimmsdimone slingle.
July 2022
What happened to this ad? :(
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Watching Thijs in the bathroom

twitchquotes: Ahhh, my favorite part of the day. After lunch, a take a break from work, lock myself in the office bathroom pretending to take a dump while I watch my favorite streamer, Thijs. Just hope my boss doesn't come knocking, otherwise I'm fired...
twitch chat
September 2020
Thijs

Kripp should change his name to hl_kripp

twitchquotes: Hello Kripparino, this is Noah Liferino, CEO of No Life IncorporatedΒ©. As you may already know, we are requiring you to change your Twitch name to hl_kripp (has life) as you no longer are a "no life". This was stated in the contract you signed under section 6 article 9 paragraph 420. This is to be enforced immediately.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Do you even βšβ–ˆβ•β•β–ˆβš

twitchquotes: KRIPP do you even βšβ–ˆβ•β•β–ˆβš
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

We wub you Reynoodle. Give chat a kissy kiss.

twitchquotes: (γ₯ οΏ£ Β³οΏ£)γ₯ We wub you Reynoodle. Give chat a kissy kiss. (γ₯ οΏ£ Β³οΏ£)γ₯
twitch chat
May 2015
Reynad

Iron Man

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆ β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆ β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆ β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆ β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β”€β”€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ”€β–€β–„β–„β–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–„β–„β–€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
ascii art
September 2021
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Text-to-Speech Playing