[Copypasta] Hey! I noticed you are fucking retarded

Hey! I noticed you are fucking retarded Hey! I noticed you are fucking retarded. I don’t know if you’re new here, so I’ll let you off the hook this time. Saying the most unfunny shit is frowned upon here on this great site, and for good reason. Fucking dumbass, mentally challenged retards do that and, you don’t want to be seen as a spastic little schizo, do you? If I catch you using shitty memes in the future, I’ll be forced to issue a report to a mental hospital. Why should you care, you may ask? Well to begin with, i know your white little ass is gonna get r***d in there, and you don’t want that to happen. Also everyone is going to see your shriveled up balls dangling as a big black man named Requis fucks the shit out of you. If you were to continue the use of retarded wording, I would be forced to personally come and beat the shit out of your little tranny faggit ass. Any further offenses past that would leave me no other option than to pay a hobo to stab you to death with a razor blade. I don’t think I have to explain why you don’t want that. But anyways, no harm done yet! Follow these simple rules and you’ll enjoy your future on the server! Have a blessed (and hopefully retarded free) day, stranger.
July 2022
I used to be a real ad
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Arena wins and donger size

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March 2014
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GG EZ

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March 2021

Top deck me and #Shrek me, you Romanian stallion

twitchquotes: Kripparrian grabs Rania by the scruff of her delicate neck, thrusting her to the Hyper-X Ultra-White High-Def gaming chair. The Krippster's rightfully claimed woman presents her rose-hued folds to her master in submission. "Top deck me and #Shrek me, you Romanian stallion" Rania wails in passion. Kripparadino kicks Cattarrian aside, and towers over the chair, "I'm gonna play this perfectly." Kripp misses lethal.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

I hope Seraphine wins xD

twitchquotes: I hope Seraphine wins xD. I’m a Seraphine main and she’s just so fun!! People get so mad at the constant singing, and her voice is so cute, like when she sings about about being in K/DA! She is so beautiful and sings like a goddess just like Twitch Chat xD
twitch chat
November 2020

League of Legends

Infinite poop

twitchquotes: Infinite poop. You sit on the toilet to poop, but the poop never stops coming out of your butt. You have to start flushing the toilet every two minutes to keep up. You try to pinch your butt closed but that makes your insides hurt. The poop accelerates. You call 911. The paramedics call for doctors. The doctors call for specialists. The story trends on Twitter. You turn down talk show appearances. Your septic tank fails. People form a cult. Your toilet is finished. Volunteers arrive with buckets and shovels. You are completely used to the smell. The poop accelerates. You are moved to a stepladder with a hole in the top step. The poop accelerates. The shovelers abandon the buckets and shovel directly out the window. The poop accelerates. A candlelight vigil forms around your house. One of the workers falls over and can't free himself. The poop accelerates. A priest knocks over the stepladder and tackles you out the window. You land in the pile. The poop accelerates. The force now propels you forward and upward. Vigil goers grab at your legs. The poop ignites from their candles. The Facebook live event hits 1 million viewers. The poop accelerates. You are 30 feet in the air. The fire engulfs the vigil and your house. 60 feet. The poop accelerates. The torrent underneath you is deafening. 5 million Facebook live viewers. You try to close up shop but your butthole disintegrated long ago. 120 feet up. Your house explodes. The poop accelerates. 1000 feet. You are now tracked on radar. You try to change your angle of ascent but you should have thought of that way earlier. The poop accelerates. 4,000 feet. NORAD upgrades to DEFCON 3. Concentric circles of fire engulf your city. The poop accelerates. You have broken the sound barrier. 30,000 feet. You no longer take in enough oxygen to sustain consciousness. 60,000 feet. CNN is reporting on all the world records you've broken. 200,000 feet. You are no longer alive. The poop accelerates. Your body disintegrates but your poop contrail remains. NASA can no longer track you. You break the light-speed barrier and we can no longer bear witness. The poop accelerates. Forever.
twitch chat
June 2019

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing