[Copypasta] Oh great! Another 2 sentence long pasta!

Oh great! Another 2 sentence long pasta! What a game changer! I'm sure the 5 measly lines of text you just posted are going to be the next big copypasta in no time! This is hilarious! Great Stuff! I can really see this being the next big thing! It's gonna be the next "Navy Seal" or "Penguin Of Doom", I can feel it! I love how short and boring it was! Extra points for being extremely forgettable with no interesting lines, a complete lack of tone, and, as I mentioned earlier, an extremely compact 30 to 40 word length! You know what you should do? You should, unprompted, post this godawful pasta in the comments of a post on a separate subreddit and when people downvote you you can post it to r/AteThePasta! Now that would be funny! Almost as funny as the pasta itself, which, may I remind you, is extremely short! God I can't believe you came up with this all on your own! Thanks so much for this! It's truly a gift! And it made me realise that no matter how hard I try I will never find a copypasta as funny as this roughly 30 word paragraph that has already been forgotten by the 47 people who upvoted it, and the 20 people who commented !thesaurizethis over and over again! And I should give up all hope of coming up with such a great pasta in my life, so I'm simply going to kill myself tonight! This is your fault! Your copypasta made me kill myself! I'm going to write your reddit username in my suicide note, as well as the entire copypasta, which I should have no trouble fitting on the page since it's so fucking short! Thanks again! 😁
May 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Super Meat Boy

⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠛⠛⣉⢉⣉⣉⣤⣬⣥⣤⣤⣤⣤⣬⣭⣈⣉⡙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⢠⣶⣶⣿⣿⢫⢷⢋⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠀⣿⣿⠟⡛⠛⠳⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⡤⠀⠉⢿⣿⡇⠿⠛⠛⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡀⣿⣏⠈⣁⢤⣠⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠄⣸⣿⡇⠀⣾⣿⣘⠛⢿ ⣿⣿⠇⣿⣧⡽⠟⣛⣛⣛⣛⠛⢛⡛⣛⣛⣛⣛⢛⡛⠿⣿⣿⣶⣷⣿⢻⣿⣇⠸ ⣿⠃⣼⣿⣿⣧⡠⣍⣿⣿⣧⣤⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣩⡅⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣾⣿⡟⢰ ⠇⣼⣿⢻⣿⣿⣿⣶⣭⣝⣙⣻⠻⠻⠛⠿⣟⣉⣭⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⣋⣬⣤⣾ ⣇⠻⣿⢺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣷⣬⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⢠⣤⣤⣤⡄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣦⣉⣛⣛⠛⣛⣉⣁⣼⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⡛⠛⠛⠛⢛⣋⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
September 2020

Today I attempted to insert a whole cantaloupe melon

twitchquotes: Today I attempted to insert a whole cantaloupe melon into my anus because the local shops had run out of apricots (I buy a lot). Using about a gallon of butter, breathing techniques and a few hours I managed to finally get it inside. However it was too uncomfortable so I tried to shit it back out.This is where things got confusing because rather than a melon sliding out half a dozen apricots did. Now there is a chance that I just blacked out upon excreting the cantaloupe and it rolled away somewhere and that I happened to have a dozen or so left over apricots lying around my rectum from earlier but I cannot for the life of me find the melon anywhere.I think I may have the power to anally turn melons into apricots. Further experimentation will be required of course (once my rectum has recovered) but if this turns out to be true then I may be able to solve world hunger.
twitch chat
April 2019

Unimpressed Squidward

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⡀⠠⠤⠀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⢤⡒⠉⠁⠀⠒⢂⡀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⣒⠤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣠⠾⠅⠈⠀⠙⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠀⢀⣀⣓⡀⠉⠀⠬⠕⢄⠀⠀ ⠀⣰⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⠶⢦⡀⠑⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢧⠀ ⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢤⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⢀⣀⣀⠙⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡄ ⠀⢹⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⠁⠀⠀⠙⡴⠁⠀⠀⠱⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠀ ⠀⠀⠱⢄⡀⠀⢰⣁⣒⣒⣂⣰⣃⣀⣒⣒⣂⢣⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠁⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠲⢼⡀⠀⠙⠀⢠⡇⠀⠛⠀⠀⣌⣀⡤⠖⠉⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡗⢄⣀⡠⠊⠈⢦⣀⣀⠔⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⡇⠀⢰⠁⠀⠀⠀⢣⠀⠀⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠔⠊⠉⠁⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⡆⠤⠿⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣧⠸⠒⣚⡩⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣏⣙⠒⢴⠈⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠋⠉⠀⠀⢳⡀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠁⠈⠉⠓⠚⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠓⠛⠛
August 2021

A GOAT says...

twitchquotes: 🐮 says moo 🦆 says quack 🐶 says bark But the 🐐 says FIRE AT WILL! NERF THIS! EXPERIENCE TRANQUILITY! HAMMER DOWN! RALLY TO ME! OH LETS BREAK IT DOWN!
twitch chat
April 2019
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

It is canon that Kermit the Frog caused 9/11 in the Muppet universe

In the 2002 TV film "It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie", there's a part where an angel shows Kermit an alrernate reality where he was never born. For whatever reason, the editors didn't really think about it, and continued to use footage with the twin towers still standing for this scene; however, they aren't there in his original universe. Therefore, something that Kermit did in his life, did in fact cause 9/11 in Muppet lore.
August 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing