I know this is really stupid but I’m sad about it.
Yesterday I had a friend come over. I’m a girl who lives alone so I guess some “dude” stuff hasn’t been done around the house.
Context: I have a spider named joe. He’s a dandy long leg. He’s been my friend in the bathroom for months and had recently made his way down to closer by me by the tub instead of on the ceiling. I like to think I gained his trust.
Well my friend goes into the bathroom and comes out said “you’re welcome”. I’m super confused. So I ask “for what?” He says “I just killed a big ass spider for you”.
I couldn’t even contain myself. I just yelled “YOU KILLED JOE?!” And started tearing up. I didn’t tell him to leave Joe alone it never occurred to me. JOE TRUSTED ME. Joe had been in my bathroom since he was super tiny and he grew to be such a big boy.
My friend was distraught. He’s a Pisces, so he immediately felt my deep sorrow for Joe. He apologized and swore to never squish any more spiders at my house.
I think Joe was biologically female because there is a baby Joe. Baby Joe is on my ceiling but idk if I can gain Baby Joe’s trust after they witnessed the murder of their parental figure.
RIP Joe I miss you so much. Getting ready in the morning will never be the same.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Half Life 3
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠴⠋⠹⡆⠀⠀⠀⠈
⣿⣿⣿⡿⠉⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⢼⡃⠀⠀⠀⠀
⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⢠⣶⣿⣿⣿⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⣷⠀⠀⠀⢀
⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠀⠀⠙⠓⠚⠁⠀⠀⠀⣾
⡏⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿
⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿
⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿
⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⣰⡆⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿
⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣇⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣏⣀⣀⣀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣤⣿⠋⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠈⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣷⣀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
Kripp is MY MAN
twitchquotes:
Ｄｅａｒ Ｋｒｉｐｐ＇ｓ Ｇａｙ Ｇｒｅｅｋ Ｂｏｙｆｒｉｅｎｄ， ｙｏｕ ｐｉｅｃｅ ｏｆ ｅｌ ｄｏｇ ｓｈｉｔｅｒｉｎｏ． Ｔｈｅ Ｋｒｉｐｐ ｉｓ ＭＹ ＭＡＮ． Ａｎｄ ｙｏｕ ｂｅｔｔｅｒ ｂａｃｋ ｔｈｅ ｆｕｃｋ ｏｆｆ． Ｐｌｚ ｎｏ ｃｏｐｙ ｐａｓｔｅｒｉｎｏ ａｌ ｐａｃｉｎｏ ｐｉｓｔａｃｈｉｏ
twitch chat
Kripp
Marginally optimizing a children's game!
twitchquotes:
Hey Kripp, loyal fan chiming in here (for once). I think your stream is great! I would have spent my time working towards a cure for cancer, or how to automate food production in the 3rd world, but luckily i stumbled onto your stream and now I can waste my time watching you marginally optimize a children's game! What a career you have made!
twitch chat
Kripp
Did you ever hear the tragedy of the man who fell into the river in Lego city?
Did you ever hear the tragedy of the man who fell into the river in Lego city? I thought not. It's not a story the Playmobils would tell you. It's a LEGO legend. Man Lego was a Dark Lord of building, so powerful and so wise he could use the bricks to influence the constructions to create rescue helicopters… He had such a knowledge of building that he could even keep the ones he cared about from falling. The dark side of the LEGOs is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice threw him into the river in LEGO city. Ironic. He could rescue others from the river, but not himself.
Lego City
Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise
Obey the call of Kripp'Thuzad
twitchquotes:
༼ ºل͟º ༽ Minions, (ง •̀_•́)ง servants, <:::::[]=¤༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ soldiers of the cold dark, obey the call of ( ͡ʘ╭͜ʖ╮͡ʘ) Kripp'Thuzad ( ͡ʘ╭͜ʖ╮͡ʘ)!!!
twitch chat
Kripp