Have you ever thought about how, to a horse, the world is basically Candyland? Like they're wandering down a trail and boom, there's just some thistles. And then to the left, a delicious tree. There's just food all over the ground everywhere. Horses seem pretty excited about it.
What happened to this ad? :(
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Did you ever hear the tragedy of xQc?
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Did you ever hear the tragedy of xQc? I thought not. It's not a story the OWL casters would tell you. It's a tank legend. xQc was a tank main, so powerful and so wise he could use his shield to influence the DPS to do their jobs.. He had such a knowledge of the shields that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The tank mains of the game is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful... the only thing he was afraid of was getting banned for toxicity, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice reported him to blizzard in his sleep. It's ironic he could save others from death, but not himself.
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xQcOW
Tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Wise
Overwatch
We have you surrounded weeb
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NaM NaM ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ NaM 
NaM ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ NaM NaM ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ WE HAVE YOU SURROUNDED, YOU FILTHY WEEB.
NaM ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ NaM NaM ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ WE HAVE YOU SURROUNDED, YOU FILTHY WEEB.
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I went to see Cars in the theater yesterday
Ok, this is ABSOLUTE fucking bullshit. I went to see Cars in the theater yesterday, and when Lightning McQueen got HOT with Sally in Radiator Springs, my boner engaged. When Lightning McQueen said "Ka-Chow!", I couldn't help it!!! I closed my eyes, and I TORE my dick to shreds, using whip like motions and pulled with great force. That was one of the best nuts I ever had, just thinking about it now gets me riled up. Thing is, I nutted all over the kid sitting right next to me, and his mom got all pissed at me, screaming at me for jacking off on her son. I told that bitch to shut the fuck up, and that jacking off is a natural, artistic, and beautiful process. You should BE HAPPY that my semen is all over your son, maybe he can learn a lesson or two about the culture and art of jacking off. HOWEVER, the movie theater managers didn't agree with me. They KICKED ME OUT of the movie theater, and I didn't even finish watching the Cars movie. Not only THAT, but they made me clean up my semen after it already dried out and solidified on the seats. THATS TORTURE!! Do you know how hard it is to clean semen after its dried out? You CLEAN semen after its FRESH out of your cock, not an hour after you fucking nutted. This is a fucking OUTRAGE. Do you really expect me to not whip out my cock and jack off when i see a HOT sex scene in a movie? Either don't ban sex scenes in movies, or LET ME jack off in your theater, assholes.
Fuck you all, I’m never listening to this sub again.
Yesterday I said we’d see a rally like we’ve never seen before
I was ridiculed and the market went down this morning so I accepted defeat and sold my nvda calls and got tesla puts.
My account is down bad right now. I also hedged with a tesla call so hopefully I’ll make something. Somehow oil also tanked.
Fuck you all. I’m only listening to myself now. You’re all retarded and so am I for listening to you.
Edit: not sure why some of you degens think I’m blaming you. Of course it’s my fault. This is a shitpost update. Stop taking it so seriously you retards
See you tomorrow
WallStreetBets
Private photoshoot only for me
twitchquotes:
ᴛʜɪs ɪs ᴛʀᴜᴍᴘ. ᴅᴜʀɪɴɢ ᴀ ʙʀᴏᴀᴅᴄᴀsᴛ ɪ ᴀᴄᴄɪᴅᴇɴᴛᴀʟʟʏ sʜᴏᴡᴇᴅ ᴍʏ ᴅᴇsᴋᴛᴏᴘ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀ ғɪʟᴇ ɴᴀᴍᴇs "ʜᴀғᴜɴᴜᴅᴇs..." ɪ'ᴍ ᴅɪsɢᴜsᴛᴇᴅ ʙʏ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ᴀssᴜᴍɪɴɢ ᴛʜɪs ɪs ᴛʜᴇ ʜᴀғᴜ ɴᴜᴅᴇs. ᴛʜɪs ɪs ᴀᴄᴛᴜᴀʟʟʏ ʜᴀғᴜɴᴜᴅᴇsGONEWILD, ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴇɴ ᴛɪᴍᴇs ᴍᴏʀᴇ sᴘɪᴄʏ ᴠᴇʀsɪᴏɴ, ᴀ ᴘʀɪᴠᴀᴛᴇ ᴘʜᴏᴛᴏsʜᴏᴏᴛ ᴏɴʟʏ ғᴏʀ ᴍᴇ. ɢᴇᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ғᴀᴄᴛs ʀɪɢʜᴛ.
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Trump