Greetings. My name is Beef, and today I would like to present an exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke. I will now begin.
Your biological mother is so morbidly obese, when she went to go get her yearly physical done, the doctor took her blood and the results concluded that she had a high blood pressure, onset type 2 diabetes, hypertension and the possibility of heart disease. She also suffers from severe depression, because she lacks confidence in her physical appearance, which enables her to consume even more food, making her more obese. Not to mention, but your mother is becoming so monstrous, she had a hard time fitting through small spaces and exceeding weight limits on practical applications. Your mother has an endless cycle of malicious eating habits that only make her health worsen over time.
I hope whoever has just read this enjoyed the humorous "your mother" joke. Thank you for your time, and have a blessed day.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
I've won 69 rounds of Fortnite
twitchquotes:
๐๐๐ผ๐ฝ๐ฎ๐ท ๐พ๐น ๐๐ธ๐พ ๐ต๐ฒ๐ฝ๐ฝ๐ต๐ฎ ๐ซ๐ฒ๐ฝ๐ฌ๐ฑ, ๐ฒ'๐ฟ๐ฎ ๐ซ๐ฎ๐ฎ๐ท ๐ฝ๐ป๐ช๐ฒ๐ท๐ฒ๐ท๐ฐ ๐ฏ๐ธ๐ป ๐ธ๐ฟ๐ฎ๐ป 90 ๐๐ฎ๐ช๐ป๐ผ ๐ช๐ท๐ญ ๐๐ธ๐พ ๐ฌ๐ธ๐ถ๐ฎ ๐ฑ๐ฎ๐ป๐ฎ ๐ช๐ท๐ญ ๐ฝ๐ฎ๐ต๐ต ๐ถ๐ฎ ๐๐ธ๐พ'๐ป๐ฎ ๐ซ๐ฎ๐ฝ๐ฝ๐ฎ๐ป ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ช๐ท ๐ถ๐ฎ? ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ฒ๐ท๐ด ๐ช๐ฐ๐ช๐ฒ๐ท ๐๐ธ๐พ ๐ต๐ฒ๐ฝ๐ฝ๐ต๐ฎ ๐น๐ฒ๐ฎ๐ฌ๐ฎ ๐ธ๐ฏ ๐ผ๐ฑ๐ฒ๐ฝ, ๐ฒ'๐ฟ๐ฎ ๐๐ธ๐ท 69 ๐ป๐ธ๐พ๐ท๐ญ๐ผ ๐ธ๐ฏ ๐๐ธ๐ป๐ฝ๐ท๐ฒ๐ฝ๐ฎ ๐๐ธ๐พ ๐ต๐ฒ๐ฝ๐ฝ๐ต๐ฎ ๐ฒ๐ญ๐ฒ๐ธ๐ฝ. ๐'๐ฟ๐ฎ ๐๐ธ๐ท ๐ช๐ต๐ต ๐ธ๐ฏ ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ฎ ๐ผ๐ด๐ฒ๐ท๐ผ ๐ฒ๐ท ๐๐ธ๐ป๐ท๐๐ฒ๐ฝ๐ฎ, ๐ ๐ฐ๐ธ๐ฝ ๐ช๐ต๐ต ๐ฝ๐ฑ๐ฎ ๐ฐ๐พ๐ท๐ผ ๐ช๐ท๐ญ ๐๐ฎ๐ช๐น๐ธ๐ท๐ผ. ๐จ๐ธ๐พ๐ป ๐ณ๐พ๐ผ๐ฝ ๐ช๐ท ๐ฒ๐ญ๐ฒ๐ธ๐ฝ ๐ผ๐๐ช๐ฝ, ๐ซ๐ฒ๐ฝ๐ฌ๐ฑ.
twitch chat
Fortnite
Imagine Fortnite Jonesy in Smash
Imagine this: You're watching the new Nintendo Direct. As it begins you hope to see the new smash reveal, and are hoping you get the character you so desperately wanted, whether it's Crash Bandicoot or Sora. The trailer begins with the classic smash opening. As you watch the trailer, you begin to feel hope that your dream may have come true. But then, at the part where the character is revealed, you hear a bus horn, and wonder "Is it coming from outside?" But no. It's from the trailer. You watch a manly figure drop out of the sky, landing gracefully in front of the characters he is about to defeat. It gazes upon his sharp-bladed pickaxe, his luxurious blond hair, and his shining silver dog tags. As the sun fades away, you finally see who it really was: It was Jonesy from Fortnite. It's a long shot, I know. But imagine.
Fortnite
Super Smash Bros
A reply to 'k'
K? K what? The letter before L? The letter after J? Did you know that in JK the K stands for โkidding?โ So your reply is โkidding?โ or K as in Potassium? Do you need some Special K for breakfast? K as in I can K/O you? Can I knock you out and feed you to hungry sharks? Sharks have a K in it. "K"? Are you fucking kidding me? I spent a decent portion of my life writing all of that and your response to me is "K"? Are you so mentally handicapped that the only letter you can comprehend is "K" - or are you just some fucking asshole who thinks that with such a short response, he can make a statement about how meaningless what was written was? Well, I'll have you know that what I wrote was NOT meaningless, in fact, I even had my written work proof-read by several professors of literature. Don't believe me? I doubt you would, and your response to this will probably be "K" once again. Do I give a fuck? No, does it look like I give even the slightest fuck about a single letter? I bet you took the time to type that one letter too, I bet you sat there and chuckled to yourself for 20 hearty seconds before pressing "send". You're so fucking pathetic. I'm honestly considering directing you to a psychiatrist, but I'm simply far too nice to do something like that. You, however, will go out of your way to make a fool out of someone by responding to a well-thought-out, intelligent, or humorous statement that probably took longer to write than you can last in bed with a chimpanzee. What do I have to say to you? Absolutely nothing. I couldn't be bothered to respond to such a worthless attempt at a response. Do you want "K" on your gravestone? Do you want people to remember you as the asshat who one day decided to respond to someone with a single letter? "Hey, look, everybody! It's that "K" guy!" That's who you are. You're going to be known as the "K" guy. How does it feel? Do you feel happy? Quite honestly, I don't care, which is why I'm not even going to respond to you. Goodbye, and good luck with your future as that guy who said "K".
Weather forecast for today, lots of salt
twitchquotes:
ใฝ๏ฝใฝ๏ฝใใฝใฝ๏ฝใฝ๏ฝใใฝใฝ๏ฝใฝ๏ฝใใฝใฝ๏ฝใฝ๏ฝใใฝใฝเผผเบ ูอเบเผฝ๏พโ สทแตแตแตสฐแตสณ แถ แตสณแตแถแตหขแต แถ แตสณ แตแตแตแตสธ - หกแตแตหข แตแถ หขแตหกแต ใฝเผผเบูอเบเผฝ๏พโ ใฝ๏ฝใฝ๏ฝใใฝใฝ๏ฝใฝ๏ฝใ๏ฝใฝ๏ฝใใฝใฝ๏ฝ
twitch chat
salty
Corridor creeper nerfed
twitchquotes:
๐In the dungeon I go deeper๐in set reviews I was a sleeper๐when minions die I get cheaper๐You guessed it right๐I'm 3 attack weaker๐
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