[Copypasta] An exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke

Greetings. My name is Beef, and today I would like to present an exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke. I will now begin. Your biological mother is so morbidly obese, when she went to go get her yearly physical done, the doctor took her blood and the results concluded that she had a high blood pressure, onset type 2 diabetes, hypertension and the possibility of heart disease. She also suffers from severe depression, because she lacks confidence in her physical appearance, which enables her to consume even more food, making her more obese. Not to mention, but your mother is becoming so monstrous, she had a hard time fitting through small spaces and exceeding weight limits on practical applications. Your mother has an endless cycle of malicious eating habits that only make her health worsen over time. I hope whoever has just read this enjoyed the humorous "your mother" joke. Thank you for your time, and have a blessed day.
April 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Obama Not Bad

β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–β–€β–€β–„β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘ β–β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β•β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β•β•β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–€β–‘β–„β–€β–Œβ–Œ β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–Œ β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆβ–‘β–Œβ–Œ β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–€β–„β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–€β–β–β–‘ β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–€β–β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–„β•β•β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–Œβ–€β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–„β–„ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„ β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
July 2015

Response to "who asked?"

I don't care if you "didn't ask". The world does not revolve around you and I can say whatever the fuck I want, and I could not care less if you didn't ask so shut the fuck up. This is why you are lonely and everyone leaves you.
August 2021

Who Asked?

Where was the Paw Patrol during the Iran Hostage Crisis?

As far as we know the PAW Patrol has the capabilities of international travel and possible covert operation capabilities. However, the PAW Patrol failed to assist in any way during the Iran Hostage Crisis of 1979, which is unacceptable seeing as the US diplomats were hostages from November 4, 1979, to January 20, 1981. Could it be that the PAW Patrol is run by Islamic extremist that utilize PAW Patrol to increase positive images of the extremist, while also taking money from the UN? Or that the PAW Patrol is US run, and was told by the CIA to not intervene with the hostage crisis? If it is the former, why so? Could the Iran Hostage Crisis be a hoax, used to crack down on Iran for bringing down the monarchy that was ruling Iran, made possible by a coup from the US and UK?
March 2021

forsenE

Ⓒ⣿⠿⠛⠛⠿Ⓙ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣢⣾⣗⣂⑀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ Ⓒ⒀⣠⣀⣀⣄⠄⠉⠛Ⓙ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⑿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ Ⓒ⣿⠫⒁β£₯⣀⣀⑁⠒⣀⣿⣿⣿⑿⠛⠻⣿⠿⠿⠙⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ β’Έβ£Ώβ‘‡β ›β ‰β β ‰β „β „β ˆβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ ƒβ „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β£€β „β „β „β „β „β „β „ Ⓒ⣿⣢⣀①⠄⠼⠗⠄⒠⣿⣿⑿⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⒐⒛⠛β ₯β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „ β’Έβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£…β£β£€β£€β£΄β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ „β „β „β „β ˆβ£Šβ£β ‘β  β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β β „ Ⓒ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⑀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⣿⣿⣢⣦⣀⣀⣀⣔⠄⠄⠄⠄ β’Έβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ Ώβ’‹β£½β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ ‹β „β „β „β „β „β „β ˆβ Έβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ ‰β β „β „β „β „ β’Έβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ β£ β‘Ύβ ‹β ‰β β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β ˆβ ™β ‰β „β „β „β „β „β „β „ β’Έβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£—β œβ ‹β „β „β „β£€β£€β£€β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β Ήβ£€β „β „β „β „β „β „β „ β’Έβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ’»β£Ώβ£¦β£Όβ£·β£¦β£€β ­β β ‰β ™β ˆβ „β „β „β „β „β „β „β ˜β£·β‘€β „β „β „β „β „ β’Έβ£Ώβ „β£ β‘Ώβ’Ÿβ’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ÿβ ‰β ‰β ‰β ‰β “β ’β „β „β „β °β Šβ “β ‚β ‰β β „β „β „β „β „ β’Έβ£Ώβ „β „β „β „β šβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£β£ β£€β‘€β‘„β „β’€β£€β£€β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „ β’Έβ β „β „β „β „β „β Ήβ Ώβ’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ Ώβ ›β ‚β Šβ ˆβ ‰β β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „
July 2019
Forsen

Emote

Penis Inspection Day

twitchquotes: I was talking to some people I know, and apparently I'm the only person who remembers "Penis Inspection Day" in Elementary School. The gym teacher took us into the washroom one at a time while everyone else kept playing, and tugged our foreskin back and inspected our penis to make sure we were developing properly and keeping clean. Surely I can't be the only one who remembers this, other people must have had Penis Inspection Day at their school too.
twitch chat
December 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing