Greetings. My name is Beef, and today I would like to present an exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke. I will now begin.
Your biological mother is so morbidly obese, when she went to go get her yearly physical done, the doctor took her blood and the results concluded that she had a high blood pressure, onset type 2 diabetes, hypertension and the possibility of heart disease. She also suffers from severe depression, because she lacks confidence in her physical appearance, which enables her to consume even more food, making her more obese. Not to mention, but your mother is becoming so monstrous, she had a hard time fitting through small spaces and exceeding weight limits on practical applications. Your mother has an endless cycle of malicious eating habits that only make her health worsen over time.
I hope whoever has just read this enjoyed the humorous "your mother" joke. Thank you for your time, and have a blessed day.
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Brofist straight in your pepperonis
twitchquotes:
Hᴇʏ Kʀɪᴘᴘ, I ᴡᴀs ᴊᴜsᴛ ɢʀᴏᴜɴᴅᴇᴅ ғᴏʀ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍ. Mʏ ᴘᴀʀᴇɴᴛs sᴀᴡ ʏᴏᴜʀ "ʙʀᴏғɪsᴛ" ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ᴛᴇᴀᴄʜɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇᴀᴛ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ᴜᴘ, ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴡ I ᴄᴀɴ'ᴛ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜ ᴛᴡɪᴛᴄʜ ᴀɴʏᴍᴏʀᴇ. Iғ I ᴇᴠᴇʀ sᴇᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ɪɴ ʀᴇᴀʟ ʟɪғᴇ, I'ʟʟ ɢɪᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀ ʙʀᴏғɪsᴛ sᴛʀᴀɪɢʜᴛ ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘᴇᴘᴘᴇʀᴏɴɪs. Tʜᴀɴᴋs ғᴏʀ ʀᴜɪɴɪɴɢ ᴍʏ ʟɪғᴇ, ᴀssʜᴏʟᴇ.
twitch chat
Kripp
Not financial advise
I'm starting to think the people telling me to buy BB at $20 were being serious about not being financial advisors
WallStreetBets
Alright, rogue I guess
twitchquotes:
"Alright, rogue, I guess" "Haven't picked mage in a while, let's go mage "Paladin isn't that good, but alright"
"Alright, rogue, I guess" "Haven't picked mage in a while, let's go mage "Paladin isn't that good, but alright"
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
No one this year has a chance against TL
twitchquotes:
Hate to break it to you, but no one this year has a chance against TL. They are easily the best team in the world this year, and its easy to see why. You have Impact, former world champion and the tank god ready to reclaim his title, and there is nothing that will stand in his way. Xmithie, the legendary jungle who knows the ins and outs of every single part of the game, ask him how much damage krugs will do to Anivia jungle at level 2 with just the starting item? He knows. Ask him where Mlxg will be at 20:43 into the game when its only 10:12? He can give you an area accurate to withing 500 units. You have Jensen, easily clapping perkz, caps, and your mum, as well as dominating the inferior Chinese and Korean mids. You have Doublelift, so called because he can carry twice as hard as any other ADC in the game, backed up by CoreJJ, a world champion who is so accurate with his Thresh hooks Riot had to program in a random number generator just to make sure he misses at least 20% of them to keep it fair to the enemy. Anyone who thinks EU, China, Korea, or any other team has a chance this year is straight up wrong.
twitch chat
League of Legends
it will look like a copy pasta
twitchquotes:
i bet if i just type out a paragraph plat chat will copy pasta it. literally there is nothing funny or interesting about this text but it is pretty long so it will look like a copy pasta.
twitch chat