[Copypasta] An exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke

Greetings. My name is Beef, and today I would like to present an exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke. I will now begin. Your biological mother is so morbidly obese, when she went to go get her yearly physical done, the doctor took her blood and the results concluded that she had a high blood pressure, onset type 2 diabetes, hypertension and the possibility of heart disease. She also suffers from severe depression, because she lacks confidence in her physical appearance, which enables her to consume even more food, making her more obese. Not to mention, but your mother is becoming so monstrous, she had a hard time fitting through small spaces and exceeding weight limits on practical applications. Your mother has an endless cycle of malicious eating habits that only make her health worsen over time. I hope whoever has just read this enjoyed the humorous "your mother" joke. Thank you for your time, and have a blessed day.
April 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

The POLICE Just Stopped ME

twitchquotes: The POLICE Just Stopped ME Came Up To My Window An Said "PAPERS"? So I Said "SCISSORS" I WON & Drove OFF The guy Must Want A REMATCH Cuz He Been CHASING Me For The Past 10 MINUTES 😳😩
twitch chat
August 2018

Hearthstone cardback

β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–„β–’β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–„β–€β–’β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–Œβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆ β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆ
July 2015

Hearthstone

This guy's appendicitis is CRAZY!

twitchquotes: β˜‘ β€œThis guy's appendicitis is CRAZY!” β˜‘ β€œMy appendix can't win against an appendicitis like that” β˜‘ "He NEEDED precisely that appendicitis to win" β˜‘ β€œHe topdecked the only appendicitis that could beat me” β˜‘ "He had the perfect infection" β˜‘ β€œThere was nothing I could do” β˜‘ β€œI played that perfectly"
twitch chat
October 2017
Kripp

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

3Head emote v2

β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£ β „β ’β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ β β €β €β£„β£€β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£ β‘Άβ ‹β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ’Ώβ£·β£¦β‘€β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⒠⣾⣿⣇⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⑀⠀⠀Ⓓ⣿⣿⣦⑀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⒠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⑄⠀⠀⠀⒠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿ⒿⒿ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’ β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£β£©β£‰β£™β‘»β’Ώβ‘Ÿβ €β €β €β Όβ Ÿβ ‹β’‰β£ β£€β£€β£€β£¬β£™β‘›β ‰β ™β’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘€β €β‘€β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’Έβ‘Ώβ β ’β Ώβ ‹β ‰β ‰β ‰β ‰β ™β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ‰β β ‰β ‰β ‰β ‰β ‰β ‹β €β €β €β Ήβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘‡β ˜β »β €β €β €β €β €β €β € ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⑇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⑇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣀⑀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠋⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£Ώβ‘‡β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β »β’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ Ÿβ ƒβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’ β£€β£„β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘€β €β’ β£΄β Ÿβ €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ ‰β ‰β β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’€β‘€β €β €β €β£΄β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˜β’Ώβ£Ώβ‘‡β €β‘Ώβ ƒβ£΄β£Άβ£Ώβ ›β ‹β ‰β£Ώβ£Ώβ ‰β ‰β ‰β ›β ›β »β£Ώβ£Άβ£¦β €β ™β €β €β €β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ ‹β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ™β£§β €β β €β ˆβ’»β£Ώβ£€β£΄β£Άβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Άβ£Άβ£Άβ£Άβ£€β£€β‘€β ˆβ β €β €β €β£ β£Όβ£Ώβ£Ώβ ‡β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˜β£§β‘€β €β €β €β ™β »β Ÿβ “β €β €β €β €β ‰β ›β ›β ‹β €β €β €β €β €β£΄β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˜β£·β£„β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’€β£Ύβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ÿβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˜β’Ώβ£§β‘„β €β €β €β €β’Ύβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘‡β €β €β €β €β €β €β’ β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ÿβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˜β’Ώβ£§β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ ‰β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£Όβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˜β’Ώβ£‡β‘€β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£Όβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ ƒβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˜β£Ώβ£Ώβ£¦β£€β£€β£€β£€β£„β£€β£€β£ β£€β£Άβ£Ώβ Ÿβ ‹β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ ›β Ώβ’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ Ώβ ‹β β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €
September 2021

You didn't ask? (response to Who Asked?)

You didn't ask? That's amazing, are you a dictator? A god? The most important person in the world? No? Then why would you say that like it matters? "I come out as a homosexual, this is really hard for me and I hope you respect that." "Did I ask?" no, you did not ask, we couldn't care less if you asked, you are nothing compared to the universe. Do you think your opinion holds a higher meaning than anyone else's? You could've said anything, something creative, even an ok or you not saying a word would be better than the phrase "Did I ask?" we get it, you never asked, but did anyone ask about you asking? Even if you said that you traveled the world to find out who asked, who asked you to do that? You didn't ask for their opinion, but nobody asked if you care at all. You aren't creative or smart. Even a caveman grunts and ooga boogas would be better than that phrase. Now stop pretending to be a god and go back to school to learn how to respect people
November 2021

Who Asked?

Text-to-Speech Playing