[Copypasta] An exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke

Greetings. My name is Beef, and today I would like to present an exceedingly excellent "your mother" joke. I will now begin. Your biological mother is so morbidly obese, when she went to go get her yearly physical done, the doctor took her blood and the results concluded that she had a high blood pressure, onset type 2 diabetes, hypertension and the possibility of heart disease. She also suffers from severe depression, because she lacks confidence in her physical appearance, which enables her to consume even more food, making her more obese. Not to mention, but your mother is becoming so monstrous, she had a hard time fitting through small spaces and exceeding weight limits on practical applications. Your mother has an endless cycle of malicious eating habits that only make her health worsen over time. I hope whoever has just read this enjoyed the humorous "your mother" joke. Thank you for your time, and have a blessed day.
April 2022
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Unlucky

β£Ώβ ‰β£Ώβ ‰β£Ώβ‘β Ήβ‘β’Ήβ‘β’Ήβ£Ώβ£Ώβ ‰β£Ώβ ‰β£Ώβ‘Ÿβ’‹β ›β£Ώβ ‰β‘Ÿβ’‰β‘β Ήβ β£Ήβ£Ώ ⣿⠄⣿⠄⣿⑇⑄⠁Ⓒ⑇Ⓒ⣿⣿⠄⣿⠄⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿⠄⑀Ⓕ⣿⑄⒠⣿⣿ ⣿⣦⣀⣴⣿⣧⣿⣀⣼⣧⣬⣭⣿⣦⣀⣴⣿⣧⣀⣀⣿⣀⣷⣀⣿⣧⣼⣿⣿
January 2022

Attention all Fortnite gamers, Trump needs you!

twitchquotes: Attention all fornite gamers. President Trump is in trouble and needs your help. Grab your pickaxes and get that quick build on. We need your Fortnite building skills to get that border wall up. Quick! find the nearest quad crasher and join Ninja in keeping those migrants out and America safe.
twitch chat
November 2018

Fortnite

BOB β€œYou’re doing GREAT out there!”

twitchquotes: BOB β€œYou’re doing GREAT out there!” I exclaim with as much enthusiasm as I can this late in the day. The scraggly vegan is the only one left in the tavern, his attention focused entirely on the card game we put out to entertain children and toddlers. β€œI don’t wanna talk about it guys” cries the man, knocking his cup of vegan water over. I try to reassure him that everyone has bad luck now and then, but he just ignores me, as always. This tavern attracts some strange types indeed.
twitch chat
September 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

Top Lel

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–β–Œβ–‘β–β–Œβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–€β–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–€β–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–„β–„β–β–’β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–Œβ–‘β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–’β–„β–β–’β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–€β– β–β–€β–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–’β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ– β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β– β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–„β–β–’β–Œβ–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–€β–€ β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–€β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–’β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–β–β–ˆβ–€β–€β–„β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–β–„β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–β–β–ˆβ–€β–€β–„β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ ▐▄▄▀░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░
November 2014

It's funny seeing the minds in chat

twitchquotes: It's funny seeing the "minds" in chat entertained by a virtual children’s card game. 🀣 Whenever you idiots β€œPog Champ,” I am reading the works of Plato, etc. Guess who will get a better job in 5 years?
twitch chat
March 2018

Classic

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing