[Copypasta] There was nothing I could do but donate

twitchquotes: ☑ “These Hafu nudes are CRAZY!” ☑ “My dick can't stay limp against nudes like that” ☑ "She NEEDED precisely those two nips to win" ☑ “She took the only nudes that could make me beat off” ☑ "She had the perfect muff" ☑ “There was nothing I could do but donate” ☑ “She cried profusely"
twitch chat
October 2014
I used to be a real ad
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I have never come across a single person who cared about what you just said

Hi there! My name is Michael Grover, and I am an explorer. Ever since I’ve been little, I’ve loved searching for new things. As a baby, my parents kept finding me in nooks and crannies around the house. “On the search” as they would say. By the age of 5, I had been to every continent on the planet, barring Antarctica. For my 12th birthday, my parents got me diving lessons, and by the time I was 13, I could scuba dive to a depth of 40 meters, as well as go cave diving. I got a pilot’s license by the age of 17, and I learned to sail just before my 18th birthday. Instead of going to university, I decided to travel around South America, exploring its rich jungles and beautiful landscapes. During my trip, I met my now wife who was also an explorer. For our honeymoon, we sailed around the Caribbean and we discovered 3 new islands which we named after the cats that I had growing up. Over the course of my life, I have come across great treasures and wondrous experiences. But in all my life, and in all my travels, I’m afraid I have never come across a single person who cared about what you just said.
April 2021

Donald Trump

⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⣿⣿⣿ ⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣰⣶⣽⣽⣷⣶⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿ ⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣆⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣤⣾⠟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣷⣶⣾⣿⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠰⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⢿⡿⣿⣿⠄⢸⣷⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣼⣿⣻⣿⡿⠿⠿⠆⠄⠄⠄⠈⢙⣿⡇⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣞⡏⠄⢸⡿⣿⣿ ⢀⠄⠄⢀⢸⢿⣿⣟⣷⣦⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣷⣐⣼⣿⣷⠄⣠⣴⣤⣤⣄⢉⡄⠄⠸⠇⣿⣿ ⣶⣇⣤⡎⠘⠁⠐⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⡇⡶⣥⣴⣿⣿ ⢣⣛⡍⠸⠄⠄⠄⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⢈⣿⣿⣿⡇⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠄⢜⣿⣿⣿ ⠃⠋⠼⠥⠄⢠⠄⠐⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢁⠈⠉⠛⠛⠛⠋⠈⠟⣿⣿⡏⠄⢸⢸⣽⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠄⠠⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣦⣤⣀⣤⣤⡀⢨⠿⣇⠄⣿⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⣾⣾⡇⡀⠄⠄⢀⢢⣽⣿⣿⡿⠿⠻⠿⠛⠛⠿⠛⠻⠜⡽⣸⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣷⠎⢡⡭⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠺⣿⣿⣷⣾⢿⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠳⢶⣿⣿⡿⢋⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠁⠄⢸⣿⡄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⠽⣿⣷⣷⣶⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣠⣬⣏⠉⠁⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠛⡟⠿⡿⢻⠛⠟⠿⠋⠁
ascii art
December 2018

No wonder Bobertxle got kicked from a shitty team CLG

twitchquotes: how is this funny, hes using yogurt, a bronze champion with the lowest win rate, picking ugone is forcing ur team to lose because he sucks, srs learn to play actual adcs instead of ugo, no wonder bobertxle got kicked from a shitty team clg because he cant play actual abcs
twitch chat
October 2014
ROBERTxLEE

voting booth inspection is not required

twitchquotes: So I was waiting in line to vote when all of a sudden this voting "official" came up to me and said that there was something wrong with my voter registration and asked me to follow him to the back. When we went around back he said that I had to take off my pants and show my cock because penis size is the most accurate way to confirm voter identity. Because I thought he was a voting official I swiftly removed my pants and underwear to show him my member. After he fondled it for a bit he said it was good and I could go back into the line. It was only after I voted I realized that he forgot to check my balls too!!! He was obviously not certified to check such an area and I immediately contacted the security guards about his presence. Please do not fall for any tricks like I did! stay safe and happy voting!
twitch chat
November 2020

2020 US Election

Kripparian here with VEGAN FACTS

twitchquotes: Hi guys Kripp here with VEGAN FACTS! Did you know that milk is literally !Worse Than Hitler! and also killed many people during the Twitch Chat-ocaust in the 1940's? If you drink milk your bones will be as frail as Reynad's Rag RNG and you'll basically be Leifman's brother. Well, that's all for today's vegan facts! Bye guys! BRO FIST!!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
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