[Copypasta] There was nothing I could do but donate

twitchquotes: ☑ “These Hafu nudes are CRAZY!” ☑ “My dick can't stay limp against nudes like that” ☑ "She NEEDED precisely those two nips to win" ☑ “She took the only nudes that could make me beat off” ☑ "She had the perfect muff" ☑ “There was nothing I could do but donate” ☑ “She cried profusely"
twitch chat
October 2014
What happened to this ad? :(
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Jake has huge RipTires

twitchquotes: Jake has huge RipTires, he is one of the best players in OWL, when Jake isn`t beating up people in Overwatch, he`s beating people in real life so you better think before you speak, peace out.
twitch chat
April 2018
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

What makes me a good Demoman? Meet the Demoman

What makes me a good Demoman? If I were a bad Demoman, I wouldn't be sittin' here, discussin' it with you now would I? Let's do it! Not one of ya's gonna' survive this! One crossed wire, one wayward pinch of potassium chlorate, one errant twitch... and kablooie! I got a manky eye. I'm a black, Scottish cyclops. So T'all you fine dandies so proud, so cocksure! Prancin' aboot with your heads full of eyeballs! Come and get me I say!I'll be waiting on ya with a whiff of the 'ol brimstone. I'm a grim bloody fable... with an unhappy bloody end! Oh, they're going to have to glue you back together... in hell!
January 2024

Team Fortress 2

Bendy and the Ink Machine

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣶⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣷⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠙⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠋⠉⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠿⠿⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⢀⣤⣤⣤⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣤⣤⣤⣀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣬⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣽⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⢰⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⣼⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣇⠀⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣉⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢉⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⢠⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡼⠋⡏⠙⡟⠲⡶⠤⣤⠴⢶⠚⢻⡋⢹⠻⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠘⣇⠀⡇⠀⡇⠀⡇⠀⣿⠀⢸⠀⢸⡇⢸⠀⡿⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢷⣄⡀⠀⠈⠳⢧⣀⡇⠀⡇⠀⣿⠀⢸⠀⣸⣧⡼⠞⠁⠀⣠⣾⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠶⣤⣀⡀⠉⠙⠛⠛⠒⠛⠛⠛⠋⠉⠁⣀⣠⡴⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠛⠲⠶⠶⠦⠤⠶⠶⠶⠚⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
ascii art
February 2021

Just hit gold and I feel really dangerous IRL

twitchquotes: Last night I hit Gold rank in League of Legends, Summoner's Rift for the first time. Today, when I went on my walk to my standard retail job, idk I felt like I had this new edge to me that wasn't there before. I went from a triangle to a square pretty much. Have any other LoL overachievers ever felt this way before? It's like my rank is strapped to my waist and now whenever people are at risk of passing me on the sidewalk, they skirt over to the other side in a tizzy. At work, someone tried to shoplift some Almond Joy. When I caught him, I yelled "hey!" And he looked at me and scoffed, like, "whatever dude, don't be a hero." I put a hand on my hip and said "I'm not a hero, I'm a jungler." He dropped the candy bar and ran to his getaway vehicle. I recorded the plate and called the police.
twitch chat
January 2020

League of Legends

Ahsoka Tano

twitchquotes: Luke, did I ever tell you about Ahsoka Tano? She was your father’s exotic teenage alien apprentice, a fine piece of jailbait from a more civilized age. She had the tightest body and the perkiest little breasts in the galaxy; barely legal in most systems. Anakin and I used to doubleteam her at the end of every successful campaign during the Clone Wars, and once in a while we’d even have the entire 501st run a train over her, part of official Jedi “training” of course. In time, she learned how to handle a meatsaber better than anyone in the Jedi Temple. She wore a miniskirt every day so we told her there were no panties in space, and since she was constantly doing acrobatics you’d get a glimpse of her orange pussy mid fight as she’d do a flip while slicing a B2 Super Battledroid in half. It was surreal. We taught her to grip her weapon backwards like a dildo and she constantly got captured by pirates and slavers almost every other day. It was ridiculous, like a constant porno Luke, you have no idea. And she was a good friend.
twitch chat
November 2020
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