[Copypasta] โš ๏ธ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my p***s was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.
December 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

eat hot chip and lie

twitchquotes: any female born after 1993 canโ€™t cookโ€ฆ all they know is mcdonaldโ€™s , charge they phone, twerk, be bisexual , eat hot chip & lie
twitch chat
November 2020

The Headbutts will be random

twitchquotes: "Tสœแด‡ สœแด‡แด€แด…ส™แดœแด›แด›s แดกษชสŸสŸ ส™แด‡ ส€แด€ษดแด…แดแด" Kส€ษชแด˜แด˜ แด…แด‡แด„ส€แด‡แด‡s. Aษดแด… sแด แด€ ษดแด‡แดก า“แด€แด„แด›ษชแดษด แดา“ sแดœส™s แดกแด‡ส€แด‡ ส™แดส€ษด. Tสœแด‡ส€แด‡ แดกแด‡ส€แด‡ แด›สœแดsแด‡ แดกสœแด แดกแด‡ส€แด‡ ส™ส€แดา“ษชsแด›แด‡แด…, แด€ษดแด… แด›สœแดsแด‡ แดกสœแด แดกแด‡ส€แด‡ ส™ส€แดส™แดœแด›แด›แด‡แด…. Sแดแดษด แด€ แดกแด€ส€ แด‡ส€แดœแด˜แด›แด‡แด… ส™แด‡แด›แดกแด‡แด‡ษด แด›สœแด‡ แด›แดกแด, แด€ษดแด… แด…แดษดษขแด‡ส€s แด€แด›แด›แด€แด„แด‹แด‡แด… แด…แดษดษขแด‡ส€s, แด€สŸสŸ ส™แด‡แด„แดแดษชษดษข sแด€สŸแด›ส..
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

IS EARTH PREPARED FOR THE LANDING OF THE MOTHERSHIP?

twitchquotes: ๐Ÿ“ž๐Ÿ‘ฝ HELLO? SINATRAA (SPECIMEN #3457) ๐Ÿ“ž๐Ÿ‘ฝHOW IS YOUR MISSION GOING? ๐Ÿ“ž๐Ÿ‘ฝ IS EARTH PREPARED FOR THE LANDING OF THE MOTHERSHIP? ๐Ÿ“ž๐Ÿ‘ฝ
twitch chat
April 2018
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

Hello Miguel Santander, this is your cat, Mellow Cat

twitchquotes: Hello Miguel Santander, this is your cat, Mellow Cat, I heard that you were complaining about my excesive meowing. I dont complain about having to hear you talk to yourself for 8 hours while playing that stupid game so I expect the same. Come here and feed me scrub CoolCat
twitch chat
October 2015
imaqtpie

DickButt

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
August 2015
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing