[Copypasta] ⚠️ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my p***s was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.
December 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Now Playing: Despacito

twitchquotes: ɴᴏᴡ ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ: Despacito ───────────────⚪─────────────────── ◄◄⠀▐▐ ⠀►►⠀⠀ ⠀ 1:17 / 3:48 ⠀ ───○ 🔊⠀ ᴴᴰ ⚙ ❐ ⊏⊐
twitch chat
August 2018

Classic

NA at worlds

twitchquotes: 4Head No matter how many imports I choose 4Head I still continue to lose 4Head and then I make an excuse 4Head you guessed it right I'm from NA 4Head my screen is always grey 4Head when at worlds I play 4Head
twitch chat
October 2018

League of Legends

EU vs NA

Parrot is just of new cat

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs ʏᴏᴜʀ ʙᴇsᴛ ғʀɪᴇɴᴅ ᴘᴀʀʀᴏᴛ. ɪ sᴇᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛ ɴᴇᴡ ғʀɪᴇɴᴅ ᴄᴀᴛ, ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴍᴀᴋᴇs ᴍʏ ʙᴇᴀᴋ ᴀᴄʜᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ғᴇᴀᴛʜᴇʀ sʜɪᴠᴇʀ. ɪ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ʀᴀɴɪᴀ sᴇxʏ ʙᴇᴅ sᴏᴜɴᴅ ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ʜᴏᴍᴇ. ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ɴᴏ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ ғʟᴀᴘᴘᴇʀɪɴᴏ ғᴇᴀᴛʜᴇʀɪɴᴏ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Think about your actions

twitchquotes: I have noticed that, although this subreddit has 179,776 readers, I am not receiving 179,776 upvotes on my posts. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to click 'upvote'. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to upvote my most recent posts. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
twitch chat
September 2018

Classic

Oi

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠙⠻⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⣠⣴⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠉⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠂⠂⠂⠈⣿ ⣿⣿⠋⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⣀⣤⣤⣀⡀⠂⠂⠂⠂⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⣿⠃⠂⠂⠂⠂⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠂⠂⠂⠂⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⡏⠂⠂⠂⠂⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⣿⡀⠂⠂⠂⠂⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠂⠂⠂⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⣿⣷⡀⠂⠂⠂⠂⠙⠻⠿⠿⠟⠋⠂⠂⠂⠂⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⠂⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠂⠂⠂⠂⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣾⣿
June 2019
Text-to-Speech Playing