[Copypasta] ⚠️ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my p***s was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.
December 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Kripp plays Armor Up Warrior

twitchquotes: Kripp puts his hands on my hips and looks into my eyes. His face comes closer as he plants his wet lips onto mine. We are locked together in a beautiful display of love. Then I wake up. I look at Kripp's stream. He is playing Armor Up Warrior. Now I remember why I fell asl... ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

On March 21st, 2016 Jerma was streaming Overwatch

On March 21st, 2016 Jerma was streaming Overwatch when suddenly he felt an overwhelming sense of dread. Moments later, Ster (who was hiding behind the curtains) snuck up behind Jerma, and after a short struggle, Ster stole Jerma's hat, saying "I'm you now." Jerma died. At that point the camera footage was frozen, but it later returned to Ster pretending to be Jerma.
March 2022
Jerma985

Overwatch

Mew

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡴⠞⢳⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡔⠋⠀⢰⠎⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⢆⣤⡞⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⢠⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣾⢳⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⢠⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣀⡤⠴⠊⠉⠀⠀⠈⠳⡀⠀⠀⠘⢎⠢⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠳⣄⠀⠀⡠⡤⡀⠀⠘⣇⡀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠓⠒⠺⠭⢵⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢹⡆⠀⢷⡇⠁⠀⠀⣸⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⢤⠀⠀⠘⢷⣆⡀⠀ ⠀⠀⠘⠒⢤⡄⠖⢾⣭⣤⣄⠀⡔⢢⠀⡀⠎⣸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⡀ ⠀⠀⢀⡤⠜⠃⠀⠀⠘⠛⣿⢸⠀⡼⢠⠃⣤⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇ ⠀⠀⠸⠶⠖⢏⠀⠀⢀⡤⠤⠇⣴⠏⡾⢱⡏⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⠃ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣇⡀⠿⠀⠀⠀⡽⣰⢶⡼⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⠟⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠳⢤⣀⡶⠤⣷⣅⡀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡠⢔⠕⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠫⠿⠿⠿⠛⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀
January 2022

Pokemon

Why did you pick Hero at EVO?

twitchquotes: Nairo, it's been weeks since EVO and I still don't understand why you didn't choose Hero and win the whole thing. It'll be a matter of time before we follow Australia's example and ban him, and you'll be sorry you didn't use his banworthy strength when you could. Also can you use Ganondorf again, he's rlly strong. Sorry for long message, but you should consider my advice. Good luck Nairo!
twitch chat
August 2019
NairoMK

Super Smash Bros

I am new to GitHub and I have lots to say

I DONT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THE FUCKING CODE! i just want to download this stupid fucking application and use it https://github.com/sherlock-project/sherlock#installation WHY IS THERE CODE??? MAKE A FUCKING .EXE FILE AND GIVE IT TO ME. these dumbfucks think that everyone is a developer and understands code. well i am not and i don't understand it. I only know to download and install applications. SO WHY THE FUCK IS THERE CODE? make an EXE file and give it to me. STUPID FUCKING SMELLY NERDS
February 2024
Text-to-Speech Playing