[Copypasta] ⚠️ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

I went to the store one time because I was out of my Men's 5-in-1 shampoo, conditioner, body wash, hand soap, and shaving cream and wanted to take a shower. As I was in a hurry I didn't bother to check the label, I just grabbed it, paid, and ran. When I got home I turned on the shower, let the water run all over my body (but not on my ass, real men don't wash that) and began applying my new 5-in-1 lotion. Or so I thought. After I had done so I nearly fell to the ground as pain spread all throughout my body (normally as a real man I can handle pain yet this was somehow an exception). I looked down and my p***s was completely gone, however my view was quickly obstructed as my pecs began to swell. I reached up to feel my chin only to realize all the hair in my beard had fallen out. My plans afterwards began to fade as I began to lose my extremely masculine interests. In a panic, I reached to turn off the water and jumped out to look in the mirror, however it must be broken as there was a woman staring back at me. It was in this moment that I grabbed the bottle and read the label: For Women.
December 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Imagine Fortnite Jonesy in Smash

Imagine this: You're watching the new Nintendo Direct. As it begins you hope to see the new smash reveal, and are hoping you get the character you so desperately wanted, whether it's Crash Bandicoot or Sora. The trailer begins with the classic smash opening. As you watch the trailer, you begin to feel hope that your dream may have come true. But then, at the part where the character is revealed, you hear a bus horn, and wonder "Is it coming from outside?" But no. It's from the trailer. You watch a manly figure drop out of the sky, landing gracefully in front of the characters he is about to defeat. It gazes upon his sharp-bladed pickaxe, his luxurious blond hair, and his shining silver dog tags. As the sun fades away, you finally see who it really was: It was Jonesy from Fortnite. It's a long shot, I know. But imagine.
September 2021

Fortnite

Super Smash Bros

PC vs console youtube comment

Says the poor brainless console peasant. No mods, no money to achieve high performance, no creativity to set up your own devices. Calling me pathetic lol, I actually work and gather money for Gaming PC whilst you console peasants probably beg to your parents for buying you a console. So tell me, have you been a good brat by doing house chores?
June 2021

People Who Fake Disorders Be Like

Red is the color of blood and that’s offensive and scary. Please refrain from using or ever mentioning the color red, as that is a trigger for me. A trigger of what you ask? One of my 20 disorders. ADHD, DID, Tourettes, OCD, anxiety, BPD, depression, OSDD, PTSD, Obesity, CPTSD, schizophrenia, psychosis, anorexia, and many many more. Prove it? Oh, let me switch real fast tics and throws phone across room OwO h-h-hello… this is Dream 🎾 (he/they) (5 years old) (trauma holder) uwu. You were just speaking to Zay🔥 (they/them) (22 years old) (Leader of the system) OwO do you be-be-believe me now? Sorry for the stutter, I was born with it 🤪😘🥸😘🥸 *switches back to Zay🔥 (They/them) (22 years old) (leader of the system) I told you 😎 but you didn’t believe me. Just wait to be canceled by all the Twitter users. Twitter, do your thing 😜
September 2021

I'm the Server Manager for PinkieCraft, the Pony Roleplay Minecraft server that you play on

Hi (name), I'm the Server Manager for PinkieCraft, the Pony Roleplay Minecraft server that you play on. On behalf of the owner, the staff team and myself, I would like to personally extend my thanks to you for the $1,000 you forked up to help keep our server alive! Our modeler is happily working on the custom pony character that came with the donor package, however I regret to inform you that we don't currently have a way to send you the 20" "horse shaft" you requested but our team is working on it. Once again, thank you sincerely for the donation, and we hope to see you back on the server soon. Best Regards, PinkieCraft Server Manager "Keep on clopping."
September 2021

Peter Pistachio

twitchquotes: Hᴇʟʟᴏ Kʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs Pᴇᴛᴇʀ Pɪsᴛᴀᴄʜɪᴏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴏʟᴅ ʜɪɢʜ sᴄʜᴏᴏʟ ᴛᴇᴀᴍᴍᴀᴛᴇ. Cᴏᴀᴄʜ Dᴏɴɢᴇʀ ᴄᴀʟʟᴇᴅ ᴍᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛᴏʟᴅ ᴍᴇ ʏᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ ɴᴏᴡ ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ ᴄᴀsᴜᴀʟs ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ʜᴀʀᴅᴄᴏʀᴇ ᴀᴛ ᴀʟʟ. Iғ ᴏᴜʀ ᴅᴀʏs ᴏɴ ᴛʜᴇ ғᴏᴏᴛʙᴀʟʟ ғɪᴇʟᴅ ᴛᴀᴜɢʜᴛ ᴜs ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ɪᴛ's ᴛᴏ ᴀʟᴡᴀʏs ᴘʟᴀʏ Hᴀʀᴅᴄᴏʀᴇ 100% ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ sʟɪᴘ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴀsᴜᴀʟs. Mᴀʏʙᴇ ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏ ʙᴀᴄᴋ ᴛᴏ ʜᴀʀᴅᴄᴏʀᴇ ᴡᴇ ᴄᴀɴ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜᴇ ʜɪɢʜ ғɪᴠᴇs ᴀɴᴅ sʜᴀʀᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ʙᴇᴇʀs ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɴᴅ Rᴀɪɴᴀɴᴀ. ᴘʟs ɴᴏ ᴄᴏᴘᴀʀɪɴᴏ ᴀʟ ᴘᴀᴄʜɪɴᴏ ɢɪʀʟғʀɪᴇɴᴅ sᴛᴇᴀʟᴀʀɪɴᴏ.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing