[Copypasta] So me and my bros wanted to once and for all test the hypothesis that we are all living in a matrix.

So me and my bros wanted to once and for all test the hypothesis that we are all living in a matrix. We came to the conclusion that a matrix could only run so smoothly because of our predictable behaviour. For example, if you eat it is likely that you swallow your food. Therefore, the matrix would be ready to initiate a digestion program. But if a group of people did something unpredictable, the matrix would shut down. So what we did is we randomly started gang banging each other. The matrix could have never predicted that because that is like super gay. But nothing happened (matrix-wise). But this is not point why am I writing about this. My friends now want to do the gang-banging shit again and I am not sure how to respond to that.
December 2021
I used to be a real ad
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I saw it on the new hip website called Reddit!

twitchquotes: I saw it on the new hip website called Reddit! It's a pun on Read and It, Reddit! Isn't that swell! There are also these things called May-mays or otherwise known as memes there. They're really funny
twitch chat
November 2014
Trick2g

I have heard that "lol you must be fun at parties" at least a hundred times

FUCK YOU. I have heard that "lol you must be fun at parties" at least a hundred times. GET FUCKING ORIGINAL. Jesus fucking christ. Stop saying the same fucking thing over and over and over again. Just because you don't agree with me DOES NOT HAVE SHIT TO DO WITH PARTIES. What the fuck. Do you fucking fart at parties or something? If so I don't want to go to your shitty-ass parties in the first place. I'll stick to my wine and cheese dinners, you know, REAL FUCKING PARTIES. I downvoted you because not one thing you said was original. You're just a robot programmed to say these phrases over and over again to feel connected to 1s and 0s on the internet. You've never been to a party. That's why you say those things. WELL I'M FUCKING tired. of it. I'm tired. Say that to me one more fucking time and I will find you. I'm taking a stand. I am so sick of the stupid "parties" comeback. It's not fun. It's not clever. It's really fucking hurtful. Thanks a lot, dick. So what if you don't like what I said. Is that any reason to dismiss my entire comment and quote a little comeback. What's next, you're going to explain to me with crayons or call out my bullshit by how I overcomplicating things? If I see one more fucking party comment, I'm going to lose it. I'm going off the fucking chain and fucking report all you motherfuckers who think it's funny to comment about being fun at parties. Try me. I will do it. I will go STRAIGHT TO THE FUCKING TOP and then I'll be the one laughing while you beg for my mercy. Then you know what I'll say while you come to me crying and begging to die so you can stop the agony? I'll say "You must be fun at parties." So yeah, If you must know, I am pretty fun at parties. Not that you'll ever find out, dick.
August 2021

D3 is boring

twitchquotes: Hmm, something tells me that Kripps audience has gotten enough from D3 for most part... Just can't really put my finger on... ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

Spiderman Logo

โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ”€โ”€โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ”€โ”€โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–Œโ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–Œโ–„โ–โ–„โ–€โ–€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ–โ–ˆโ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ–ˆโ–Œโ”€ โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ”€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–€โ–„โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–„โ”€ โ–โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–ˆโ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–Œ โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€ โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€
ascii art
September 2021

Priced in

Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
December 2020

Classic

WallStreetBets

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