[Copypasta] Ten reasons why you can't move to Scotland

Tin resins why ye canae move tae Sco'land. Win - We dinnae want ye here Tae - Yer nae hard enough Threh - Ye wouldnae like the wither (and ye wouldne ken hoo tae describ it - dreich, drookit, haar, etc) Fir - Yer a dafty who couldne git intae oor big skels and dinnae ken aboot the Sco'ish Enlightinment Fiv - Yer a big girruls blouse and cannae keep up wi oor drinkin Sex - Yed get snapped in hoff if ye played fitbaw wi us sivvun - Ye coodnae handle the patter It - Wae dinnae wint ye drivin up the hoos prices Nin - Yer pribly a jobbyjabber who likes it it in the backsie Tin - Oor wimmun boke at the sight of ye If somehoo ye dae mit the abuv requirmints then ye can enter but ye must promis to vote fi SNP, the ONLY party that trilly represents Sco'land. Fuck off hame any English cunts.
September 2021
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Do NOT meet Robert Downey Jr. in real life!

I met him in real life and told him how much of a fan I was. He kept on saying rude things to me such as "Who are you", "How did you get in my house" and "I'm calling the police." Celebrities, PLEASE respect your fans!
June 2021

DickButt

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–€β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
August 2015

Everything changed when the Hearthstone nation attacked

twitchquotes: Diablo. PoE. WoW. GW2. Long ago,the four games lived together in harmony. Then, everything changed when the Hearthstone nation attacked. Only Kripp, master of no life gaming, could stop them, but when the world needed him the most, he played ResidentSleeper stone.
twitch chat
September 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Attention all Fortnite gamers

twitchquotes: Attention all Fortnite gamers: John Wick is in great danger and he needs your help to wipe out the squads in the Tilted Towers, but to do this he needs a golden scar and a couple of chug jugs. To help him, all he needs is your credit card number, the three digits on the back, and the expiration month and year. But, you gotta be quick, so John Wick can secure the bag and achieve the epic Victory Royal!
twitch chat
November 2018

Classic

Fortnite

V for Vendatta

β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β–“β–“β–“β–“β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–“β–“β–“β–“β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β–“β–“β–“β–“β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β–“β–“β–“β–“β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ•¬β•¬β•¬β•¬β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ
September 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing