Tin resins why ye canae move tae Sco'land.
Win - We dinnae want ye here
Tae - Yer nae hard enough
Threh - Ye wouldnae like the wither (and ye wouldne ken hoo tae describ it - dreich, drookit, haar, etc)
Fir - Yer a dafty who couldne git intae oor big skels and dinnae ken aboot the Sco'ish Enlightinment
Fiv - Yer a big girruls blouse and cannae keep up wi oor drinkin
Sex - Yed get snapped in hoff if ye played fitbaw wi us
sivvun - Ye coodnae handle the patter
It - Wae dinnae wint ye drivin up the hoos prices
Nin - Yer pribly a jobbyjabber who likes it it in the backsie
Tin - Oor wimmun boke at the sight of ye
If somehoo ye dae mit the abuv requirmints then ye can enter but ye must promis to vote fi SNP, the ONLY party that trilly represents Sco'land.
Fuck off hame any English cunts.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Second breakfast
twitchquotes:
"Rania, where's my breakfast?" asks the Kripp. "You already had it!" she replies. "Yes, I've had one, but what about second breakfast?" asks the Kripp. As Rania walks away, Kripp is startled. "I don't think she knows about second breakfast," Kripp panics, "What about brunch, elvensies, afternoon falafel?"
twitch chat
Kripp
i peed white
twitchquotes:
i peed white 
twitch chat
Sheldon says BAZINGA
"I've never been a fan of Internet Explorer" Crowd laughs nervously and a few grunts are heard from the back seats as people edge closer to hear the punchline. "Why not? Don't you like the internet?" The crowd suddenly stands up, aware that they are about to receive what they came for. People slowly edge closer to the set as Sheldon prepares for his next line. Sweat is clearly visible on his brow and his mouth is quivering in anticipation as he readies himself for what is about to happen. "I just prefer Firefox because, like the fox, I am cunning and nimble." The crowd suddenly surges forward as the words escape Sheldon's mouth. They are so powerful, they almost shake the very foundations of the CBS studios. He watches as, in what he perceives as slow motion, the crowd moves toward his fragile body. He has been preparing for this moment his whole life. This is his moment. This is his Emmy. This is his Golden Globe. This is even his Oscar. The crowd converges around him so quickly they ignore the trampled cries of Leonard and Penny, who now lie shaking on the floor, their bones crushed by the sheer mass of the crowd. Sheldon stares back at the eyes around him. What he sees are no longer people. What he sees is the human psyche stripped down to its core. Their lives, what they were before this moment has been forgotten. Ravenous. Hungry. They want one thing from him. Sheldon closes his eyes, clears his mind and relaxes his body. What happens next depends completely on the next few seconds. The time between this and what he mutters next feels like an eternity. Slowly, he opens his eyes. He looks at Leonard, then at Penny, both lying lifeless on the floor. Without a second thought, he says with resounding conviction... "BAZINGA" In a split second, the crowd pounces on his ready and waiting body. Man, woman, child all at once. Sheldon cries out in complete ecstasy as they consume his flesh. He stops suddenly, as he drifts into eternal slumber. Peace at last.
Exercise caution and stay away from the Subs
twitchquotes:
SECURITY ALERT: A Romanian man, roughly 6'5", skeleton thin, with black hair and scraggly beard has been seen riding the NYC Sub train and violently "Bro-Fisting" passengers. He's accompanied by a short Asian man dressed as Hitler who reputedly cuts out the tongue of anyone who refuses to give him $5. Exercise caution and stay way from the Subs!
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
Cinco de Mayo Emoji Pasta v4
It’s CincHOE🎉 de mayHOE😈😘but all I want 🙏🏻 is cinco🖐️5️⃣ DICKS 🌯🍆💦 in my May-OUTH 😩👅💦 Today the SEXicans 😍🇲🇽 beat the French 😒🇫🇷 at the Battle of Puebla 🔫☠ and now you’re gonna get your piñata beat 😜😩 Time to sink this Mexican🇲🇽 dick🍆 into that dirty😳 chihuahua pussy🐶 but❗️ONLY❗️ if you send 📲 this to 5️⃣ amigos 👬 you’d cross borders ➡️ for 👌🏻💯 Get 5️⃣ back 🔙 and you’ll find the Juan for you tonight ❤️☺️😘