[Copypasta] All intensive purposes

I hole-hardedly agree, but allow me to play doubles advocate here for a moment. For all intensive purposes I think you are wrong. In an age where false morals are a diamond dozen, true virtues are a blessing in the skies. We often put our false morality on a petal stool like a bunch of pre-Madonnas, but you all seem to be taking something very valuable for granite. So I ask of you to mustard up all the strength you can because it is a doggy dog world out there. Although there is some merit to what you are saying it seems like you have a huge ship on your shoulder. In your argument you seem to throw everything in but the kids Nsync, and even though you are having a feel day with this I am here to bring you back into reality. I have a sick sense when it comes to these types of things. It is almost spooky, because I cannot turn a blonde eye to these glaring flaws in your rhetoric. I have zero taller ants when it comes to people spouting out hate in the name of moral righteousness. You just need to remember what comes around is all around, and when supply and command fails you will be the first to go. Make my words, when you get down to brass stacks it doesn't take rocket appliances to get two birds stoned at once. It's clear who makes the pants in this relationship, and sometimes you just have to swallow your prize and accept the facts. You might have to come to this conclusion through denial and error but I swear on my mother's mating name that when you put the petal to the medal you will pass with flying carpets like it’s a peach of cake.
September 2021
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Donald Trump with mic

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠋⠉⡉⣉⡛⣛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣸⣿⣿⡿⠿⡯⢙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⡀⠄⢀⣀⣉⣉⣉⠁⠐⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⣿⣿⣀⠈⠿⢟⡛⠛⣿⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠁⠰⣄⣴⡬⢵⣴⣿⣤⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⢀⢄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⡉⠻⣿⡿⠁⠘⠛⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠄⠄⠈⠻⠄⠄⠄⠄⢘⣧⣀⠾⠿⠶⠦⢳⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⡀⢀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⢣⣶⡒⠶⢤⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠄⢘⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠛⠻⠻⠺⣼⣿⠟⠋⠛⠿⣿⣿ ⠋⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣶⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣤⣾⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣷⡤⠄⠰⡆⠄⠄⠈⠉⠛⠿⢦⣀⡀⡀⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢿⣿⠟⡋⠄⠄⠄⢣⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠹⣿⣀ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣷⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⢺⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠹⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠸⣿⡄⠄⠈⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⢹⣧⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘
August 2019

Christmas for a wsb trader

As the tree blinks from white to red to green, you look at the void under the tree that previously held presents. Fewer this year than usual, but some. How did you get here? Boredom? In March, you felt trapped with your wife and infant. You needed something to pass the time. Something you could throw yourself into fully. “Are you coming to bed?” your wife yells down the stairs. It seemed harmless at first, but as the pandemic drew on, so did your investment. You’ll stop soon, though. “Soon!” you reply, and you hear her feet climb the steps. The lights start to blink chaotically. You cringe because you could only afford the junk strands at CVS. Suddenly they halt—the alternation feature broken—on red. The red fills the room and covers your flesh. You look down at your hands, and they look like they’re bleeding. Like your calls. After a time—hours?—you realize you’re sitting in complete darkness. Your lights have expired, worthless.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

I just smashed my TV because of the SPY

I just smashed my TV in front of 30 guests at my house because of the SPY. My wife just took our crying kids and said they’re all spending the week at a hotel. This sub has ruined my life and my party. I can’t handle this anymore. Goodbye Powell. I am no longer a fan.
March 2022

WallStreetBets

I've noticed that your reddit avatar is not wearing a hijab

Sister. I've noticed that your reddit avatar is not wearing a hijab. When you wear a hijab, you are obeying the commands of Allah, and you can expect great rewards in return. It is Allah's protection of your natural beauty. You are too precious to be "on display" for each man to see. It is Allah's preservation of your chastity. Allah purifies your heart and mind through the hijab. Allah raises your dignity through the hijab. When a strange man looks at you, he respects you because he sees that you respect yourself. And this applies to your reddit avatar as well.
July 2021

Reddit

Anonymous (Guy Fawkes)

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣀⣤⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣦⣤⣤⣄⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣴⣿⣿⡿⣿⢿⣟⣿⣻⣟⡿⣟⣿⣟⡿⣟⣿⣻⣟⣿⣻⢿⣻⡿⣿⢿⣷⣆⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢘⣿⢯⣷⡿⡿⡿⢿⢿⣷⣯⡿⣽⣞⣷⣻⢯⣷⣻⣾⡿⡿⢿⢿⢿⢯⣟⣞⡮⡀⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢸⢞⠟⠃⣉⢉⠉⠉⠓⠫⢿⣿⣷⢷⣻⣞⣿⣾⡟⠽⠚⠊⠉⠉⠉⠙⠻⣞⢵⠂⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢜⢯⣺⢿⣻⣿⣿⣷⣔⡄⠄⠈⠛⣿⣿⡾⠋⠁⠄⠄⣄⣶⣾⣿⡿⣿⡳⡌⡗⡅⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢽⢱⢳⢹⡪⡞⠮⠯⢯⡻⡬⡐⢨⢿⣿⣿⢀⠐⡥⣻⡻⠯⡳⢳⢹⢜⢜⢜⢎⠆⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠠⣻⢌⠘⠌⡂⠈⠁⠉⠁⠘⠑⢧⣕⣿⣿⣿⢤⡪⠚⠂⠈⠁⠁⠁⠂⡑⠡⡈⢮⠅⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠠⣳⣿⣿⣽⣭⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣺⣟⣾⣻⣿⣯⢯⢿⣳⣶⣶⣶⣖⣶⣮⣭⣷⣽⣗⠍⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢀⢻⡿⡿⣟⣿⣻⣽⣟⣿⢯⣟⣞⡷⣿⣿⣯⢿⢽⢯⣿⣻⣟⣿⣻⣟⣿⣻⢿⣿⢀⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⡑⡏⠯⡯⡳⡯⣗⢯⢟⡽⣗⣯⣟⣿⣿⣾⣫⢿⣽⠾⡽⣺⢳⡫⡞⡗⡝⢕⠕⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢂⡎⠅⡃⢇⠇⠇⣃⣧⡺⡻⡳⡫⣿⡿⣟⠞⠽⠯⢧⣅⣃⠣⠱⡑⡑⠨⢐⢌⠂⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠐⠼⣦⢀⠄⣶⣿⢿⣿⣧⣄⡌⠂⠢⠩⠂⠑⣁⣅⣾⢿⣟⣷⠦⠄⠄⡤⡇⡪⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠨⢻⣧⡅⡈⠛⠿⠿⠿⠛⠁⠄⢀⡀⠄⠄⠘⠻⠿⠿⠯⠓⠁⢠⣱⡿⢑⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢌⢿⣷⡐⠤⣀⣀⣂⣀⢀⢀⡓⠝⡂⡀⢀⢀⢀⣀⣀⠤⢊⣼⡟⡡⡁⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢢⠚⣿⣄⠈⠉⠛⠛⠟⠿⠿⠟⠿⠻⠻⠛⠛⠉⠄⣠⠾⢑⠰⠈⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠑⢌⠿⣦⡡⣱⣸⣸⣆⠄⠄⠄⣰⣕⢔⢔⠡⣼⠞⡡⠁⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠑⢝⢷⣕⡷⣿⡿⠄⠄⠠⣿⣯⣯⡳⡽⡋⠌⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⢮⣿⣽⣯⠄⠄⢨⣿⣿⡷⡫⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠙⠝⠂⠄⢘⠋⠃⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
February 2021
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