[Copypasta] I think I'm addicted to settings

God, I fucking love the settings app. I can't stop fucking changing the text size and checking for the new system update. God, the little slider icon turns me on so much. Whenever there is a system update I cry because I can't go on settings again. My screen time shows 107 hours of settings a day, which isn't even fucking possible.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

That hunk of a man is an E-sports athlete?

twitchquotes: That hunk of a man, [insert Cyber sportsman here], is an E-sports athlete? Unbelievable. Kreygasm He could be a Calvin Klein model. Kreygasm Or a pro footballer with a ripped physique like that. Kreygasm That is by far the hottest Cyber sportsman to ever grace the esports industry. Kreygasm
twitch chat
October 2020

I'm Kripp Harrison, and this is my Hearthstone stream

twitchquotes: I'm Kripp Harrison, and this is my Hearthstone stream. I work here with my dog and my wife, Rania the Succubus. Every arena run in here has a story and a price. One thing I've learned after 21 years - you never know WHAT my opponent is going to topdeck
twitch chat
August 2016
Kripp

Rick Harrison

Hearthstone

Alvin from "Alvin and the Chipmunks" is not a chipmunk

Alvin from "Alvin and the Chipmunks" is not a chipmunk. This is proven by the name "Alvin and the Chipmunks", as you can see, Alvin is separated from the chipmunks, suggesting that Alvin is an entirely different species, making him an "imposter" amongst the others. Also, in "The Chipettes", Brittney has the strongest resemblance to Alvin, so why is it not called "Brittney and the Chipettes". So all that proves that Alvin is not a chipmunk. Not to mention that Alvin wears red, and I'm not sure about you, but that seems awfully sus to me. In the video game "Among us", the color red is was the birth of the obnoxious catchphrase, "red sus", being that the color red in the game is a stereotype that they are the imposter. While that might be unrelated, keep in mind that Alvin wears red too, and he is also the imposter amongst the other chipmunks. So this proves that Alvin is not a chipmunk, or anything like that. Alvin is just a sussy amogus imposter.
October 2021

Lenny face centipede

โ•šโ•( อกยฐ อœส– อกยฐ)โ•โ• โ•šโ•(โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ)โ•โ• โ•šโ•(โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ)โ•โ• .โ•šโ•(โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ)โ•โ• ..โ•šโ•(โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ)โ•โ• โ€ฆโ•šโ•(โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ)โ•โ• โ€ฆโ•šโ•(โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ)โ•โ• ..โ•šโ•(โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ)โ•โ• .โ•šโ•(โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ)โ•โ• โ•šโ•(โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ)โ•โ• .โ•šโ•(โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ)โ•โ• ..โ•šโ•(โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ)โ•โ• โ€ฆโ•šโ•(โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ)โ•โ• โ€ฆโ•šโ•(โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ)โ•โ• โ€ฆ..โ•š(โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ)โ• โ€ฆโ€ฆโ•š(โ–ˆโ–ˆ)โ• โ€ฆโ€ฆโ€ฆ(โ–ˆ) โ€ฆโ€ฆโ€ฆ.*
December 2020

"kappa this, kappa that" Does it ever stop?

twitchquotes: "kappa this, kappa that" Does it ever stop? When will this stuff stop being HILARIOUS to people? I mean seriously is there no originality left on this world? Are we all just monkey see monkey do? I don't know about you guys but I'm sick of every time I look up a game, or a forum post, anything really I have to scroll past like 50 of these.
twitch chat
August 2017

I hate Twitch Chat

Text-to-Speech Playing