God, I fucking love the settings app. I can't stop fucking changing the text size and checking for the new system update. God, the little slider icon turns me on so much. Whenever there is a system update I cry because I can't go on settings again. My screen time shows 107 hours of settings a day, which isn't even fucking possible.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
This is the 12-0 Police, you're coming with... nevermind
twitchquotes:
(炭路炭墓摊路炭 炭) This is the 12-0 Police, you're coming with ... Nevermind wrong person. (路炭墓摊路炭 炭)
twitch chat
Trump
Tesla is restarting production today
twitchquotes:
Tesla is restarting production today against Alameda County rules. I will be on the line with everyone else. If anyone is arrested, I ask that it only be me.
twitch chat
Imagine getting BOO'd by Aurateur
twitchquotes:
Imagine getting BOO'd by Aurateur. Literally instantly you get disintegrated. Before you can even react, every fiber of your being is atomized and lost to a mere button press. Every memorable moment of your life and all hope of a future is wasted in this brief moment a BALD Texan disliked your level. In a flash your existence is nothing but a poof. Thereafter, the BALD Texan continues on, swiftly forgetting of your existence, you having been nothing but an obstacle in his way.
twitch chat
Aurateur
Re-read my statement. Your reply is a logical fail
twitchquotes:
Re-read my statement. Your reply is a logical fail. I would know because I scored a 174 on the LSAT which got me into Northwestern Law after graduating with top honors from UC Berkeley. BTW...the LSAT is an exam in logic.
twitch chat
I put sushi in my husband鈥檚 butthole while he was asleep
He was sleeping soundly naked, and I was eating leftover sushi. I couldn't help myself. I spread open his cheeks ever so softly, and tucked a slice of Philly roll right next to his puckered asshole. He did not wake up. When he awoke several hours later, he thought he had shit himself. I managed to video him discovering it was in his asshole, and I cannot stop watching him dig salmon, cream cheese, and rice out of his butthole. I also cannot stop laughing. I needed to tell someone.