[Copypasta] I'm shaking. I'm fucking shaking (Nolan Grayson)

I'm shaking. I'm fucking shaking. I never wanted to breed with anyone more than I want to with Nolan Grayson. That perfect, shredded body. The perfectly trimmed mustache. The planet conquering skills of a literal god. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never mate with him, have him pass his genes through me, and have me birth a set of perfect offspring. I'd do fucking ANYTHING for the chance for Nolan Grayson to get me pregnant. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fucking bear. Why would Robert Kirkman create something so perfect? To fucking tantalize us? Fucking laugh in our faces?! Honestly, I just fucking can't anymore. Fuck.
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
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RIP the Kripparrian

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) i remember when seeing The Female Barbarian's Face in my Twitch TV Followers List made me happy inside to see the Kripparrian streaming, and see him farm endless hours of D3 or PoE, but now I just think of that succubus girlfriends he has and all the dogs barking and NAZIS shouting, RIP The Kripparrian ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
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Ninja literally made gaming mainstream

twitchquotes: Ninja literally made gaming mainstream. Before him people looked down on gaming like it was only for nerds or whatever. He made it okay for everyone to play video games without beings called a virgin or nerd.
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April 2019
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Repeating yourselves like parrots

twitchquotes: Wow, you imbeciles are especially stupid tonight. Repeating yourselves like parrots, spouting puerile taunts at each other, using crude 'emoticons'... Can you even form SENTENCES? One day you'll all be too dumb to even type your 'dongers,' and then twitch chat can finally have some merit. Until then, I'll stick to the moderated streams..
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February 2015
Kripp

I hate Twitch Chat

The pandemic in 2028 is kinda sus

Year is 2028 The pandemic has gotten so bad we are all forced to wear colored isolation suits with their own oxygen tank and no hands for contact. Those infected are turned into sociopathic murders that try to secretly kill everyone, but still dress and act like the rest of us. I work as a spaceship engineer in the Skled along with 9 other people. We just got notified that one among us was infected, but we still have to keep maintaining the ship otherwise it will explode. We are trying to figure out who it is by voting. 2 of us are already dead and i saw red vent, but nobody believes me. I think the others want to vote me off. This might be the last thing i'll write. Goodbye. Tell me wife i love her.
January 2022

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Game on!

twitchquotes: Hey everyone! Google employee here. Looks like you guys are having a good time Kappa. Just a friendly reminder to link your Google+ account and avoid streaming any copyrighted material. Game on!
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January 2015
imaqtpie
Text-to-Speech Playing