[Copypasta] A scholar hates twitch chat

The myriad of idiosyncratic atrocities bestowed on this chat from these juvenile delinquents have caused a monstruous amount of turmoil and I cannot fathom this type of malignancy. These futile behaviors have abruptly penetrated the purity of my dear soul.
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

SYMMETRA ACTIVATED

twitchquotes: Jebaited BASTION OVERRATED Jebaited TORB OUTDATED Jebaited LONG HAVE WE WAITED Jebaited SYMMETRA ACTIVATED Jebaited
twitch chat
March 2018
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

Seven flamestrikes is not a FREE TO PLAY deck

twitchquotes: Kripp, how can you even PRETEND that you are playing with a FREE TO PLAY deck when yours has seven flamestrikes? I thought this stream was newbie friendly, well apparently I was mistaken. For the sake of ***. Unsubbed, unfollowed and unremembered. Bye, Kripp.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

I sold my sandwich to learn about the Lucian level 2 power spike

twitchquotes: I sᴏʟᴅ ᴍʏ sᴀɴᴅᴡɪᴄʜ ᴛᴏ ʟᴇᴀʀɴ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇ Lᴜᴄɪᴀɴ ʟᴇᴠᴇʟ 2 ᴘᴏᴡᴇʀ sᴘɪᴋᴇ. Jᴜsᴛ ᴀs ɪ ᴡᴀs ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴛᴏ ɢᴇᴛ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴏғ ᴍᴀsᴛᴇʀ ᴛɪᴇʀ ᴇʟᴏ ʜᴇʟʟ, I ᴅɪᴇᴅ ᴏғ sᴛᴀʀᴠᴀᴛɪᴏɴ. Iғ ᴏɴʟʏ I ʜᴀᴅ ᴇᴀᴛᴇɴ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴛᴏᴀsᴛᴇᴅ ᴛᴜɴᴀ sᴀʟᴀᴅ ʜᴏᴀɢɪᴇ, I ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʙᴇ ᴀʟɪᴠᴇ ᴛᴏᴅᴀʏ ᴛᴏ ᴛʏᴘᴇ ᴛʜɪs
twitch chat
February 2015
imaqtpie

Meeting Kripp at the urinals

twitchquotes: hey "kripp" we met at the urinals at the taco bell in LA..i asked you if i could shake your donger and you never responded...please confirm and we can meet again thanks
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Do you have what it takes to be a Memester?

slow claps steps out of the shadows Heh... not bad, kid. Not bad at all. Your meme, I mean. It's not bad. A good first attempt. It's plenty dank... I can tell it's got some thought behind it... lots of quotable material... But memeing isn't all sunshine and rainbows, kid. You're skilled... that much I can tell. But do you have what it takes to be a Memester? To join those esteemed meme ranks? To call yourself a member of the Ruseman's Corps? Memeing takes talent, that much is true. But more than that it takes heart. The world-class Memesters - I mean the big guys, like Johnny Hammersticks and Billy Kuahana - they're out there day and night, burning the midnight meme-oil, working tirelessly to craft that next big meme. And you know what, kid? 99 times out of a hundred, that new meme fails. Someone dismisses it as bait, or says it's "tryhard," or ignores it as they copy/paste the latest shitpost copypasta dreamt up by those sorry excuses for cut-rate memers over at reddit. The Meme Game is rough, kid, and I don't just mean the one you just lost :). It's a rough business, and for every artisan meme you craft in your meme bakery, some cocksucker at 9gag has a picture of a duck or some shit that a million different Johnny No-Names will attach a milion different captions to. Chin up, kid. Don't get all mopey on me. You've got skill. You've got talent. You just need to show your drive. See you on the boards...
June 2017
Text-to-Speech Playing