[Copypasta] Bowling simulator: E-Bowler

twitchquotes: Hello my name is Kenneth Jizbombski, president of Viral Games, Inc. Recently sales of our most popular Bowling simulator "E-Bowler" have plummeted. Please help my small company by going out and getting E-Bowler any way that you can. I want E-Bowler to spread infecting people with it's incredible gameplay!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Yer in proper mess ya nob head

twitchquotes: ᴜ ᴡᴏᴛ ᴍ8? ɪ sᴡᴇʀ ᴜ ᴀʀᴇ ᴏɴᴇ ᴄʜᴇᴇᴋʏ ᴄᴜɴᴛ ᴍᴀᴛᴇ, sᴀʏ ɪᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴍʏ ғᴀᴄᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴛ ᴏɴʟɪɴᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴇ'ʟʟ sᴇᴇ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʜᴀᴘᴘᴇɴs. ɪ sᴡᴇʀ 2 ᴄʜʀɪsᴛ I'ʟʟ ʜᴏᴏᴋ ʏᴏᴜ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ɢᴀʙʙᴀ. ʏᴏᴜ ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ sʜᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴍᴏᴜᴛʜ ᴏʀ ɪᴍ ᴄᴀʟʟɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ ʜᴏᴍᴇʙᴏʏs ʀɪᴛᴇ ɴᴏᴡ ᴘʀᴇᴘᴀʀɪɴ ғᴏʀ ᴀ ᴘʀᴏᴘᴇʀ ʀᴜᴍʙʟᴇ. ᴛʜᴀ ʀᴜᴍʙʟᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛʟʟ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ʏᴏᴜʀ ɴᴀɴ sᴏʀᴇ ᴊᴜs ʜᴇᴀʀɪɴ ʙᴏᴜᴛ ɪᴛ. ʏᴇʀ ɪɴ ᴘʀᴏᴘᴇʀ ᴍᴇss ʏᴀ ɴᴏʙ ʜᴇᴀᴅ.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Kripparrian has ripped in the aether

twitchquotes: Today, November 25, 2014 marks the day that kripparrian has ripped into the aether. He was hit in the head by a Riot Gas thrown by Ferguson Police all the way from US. Please join me as we all fist ourselves without Lube in his remembrance BibleThump
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Kripp, Blizzard here again

twitchquotes: Kripp, Blizzard here again. We've noticed that you've been away from Hearthstone for at least 2 hours. We're just wondering if everything is okay. Is it still mages? We're serious about nerfing them if it's a problem to you. Our Viewbots are ready to bring you much ad revenue. Thank you Kripp, hope to see you soon!
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

Viewbots

Hearthstone

Kripp's friend parrot is jealous

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs ʏᴏᴜʀ ʙᴇsᴛ ғʀɪᴇɴᴅ ᴘᴀʀʀᴏᴛ. ɪ sᴇᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛ ɴᴇᴡ ғʀɪᴇɴᴅ ᴄᴀᴛ, ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴍᴀᴋᴇs ᴍʏ ʙᴇᴀᴋ ᴀᴄʜᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ғᴇᴀᴛʜᴇʀ sʜɪᴠᴇʀ. ɪ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ʀᴀɴɪᴀ sᴇxʏ ʙᴇᴅ sᴏᴜɴᴅ ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ʜᴏᴍᴇ. ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ɴᴏ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴᴏ ғʟᴀᴘᴘᴇʀɪɴᴏ ғᴇᴀᴛʜᴇʀɪɴᴏ
twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp

Ahoy Kripp, ya landlubber

twitchquotes: ୧༼ °͠_▀̿ ༽? Ahoy Kripp, ya landlubber. We request a swashbuckling pirate deck, else ye be walkin the plank. ୧༼ °͠_▀̿ ༽?
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

୧༼ಠ益ಠ༽୨ riot ୧༼ಠ益ಠ༽୨

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