Give it up folks, einstein over here has something to say. What's that buddy? Wha- A grammatical error?!? WHAT?!? B... Bu... That can't be possible! Surely not! A GRAMMAR MISTAKE? IN MY SIGHT?!? What a great, absolute miracle that you and your 257 IQ Brain was here to correct it! Thank you! Have my grattitude, Actually, What's your cashapp? I'd like to give you 20$... Know what? While we're at it have the keys to my car. Actually, no, scratch that. Have the keys to my house, go watch my kids grow up and fuck my wife. Also, my Paypal username and password is: Ilikesmartazzes4 and 968386329. Go have fun. Thank you for your work.
I used to be a real ad
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ACHOO! Sorry, did I spray you?
ACHOO! Sorry, did I spray you? π¦π π§»Coronaπ€§ is CUMMINGπ¦ for us and youβve just tested π±positiveπ¦ for being πNAUGHTYπ π
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over so I can administerπ©ββοΈ your treatmentπ and injectπ you with the vaccineπ Weβll spend the πlockdownπ flattening the curveπ and FATTENING DEMβ ππΏ CURVES π Get ready for 14 days of π―THICC DICC DIAGNOSTICSπ and sitting on my facemaskπ· Send this βοΈ to covid-19 of your sloppiest π¦π¦SYMPTOMATICπ€ SLUTSπ€« If you get 5 back, youβre a Wuhan batπ¦ bitch π If you get 10 back, youβre a πhornyπhealthyπͺhoeπ If you get all 19 backπ your assπ is the ANTIDOTEπ and itβs in high demand π¬πΏ
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monkaEyes
AITA for not telling my wife about all the hitchhikers I killed in the 70s?
Back when I (68M) was a young and dumb twenty-something, I spent a few carefree years in Southern California raping, torturing, and murdering hitchhikers. I don't want any judgement from SJWs about this, please, if you didn't live in Cali in the 1970s, you wouldn't understand. It was just what we did back in those days. Eventually I grew up, got married, had three beautiful kids, and was content to just get off to my trophies and polaroids, and maybe kill the occasional drifter on special occasions.
The other day, my wife (37F) found the hidden panel in my basement wall where I keep all the old memories, and she went ballistic. I tried to calm her down, explained that, firstly, they were all dudes, so she shouldn't exactly be getting jealous. Second, they're all dead, so it's not like she's going to have to worry about me leaving her for any of them. Third, there were like three or four other guys doing the same thing around then, and they took the credit for most of my kills. I was very careful, covered my tracks, rarely finished inside them. I don't know why she's got her knickers in such a twist.
Quite frankly, I'm feeling really hurt about the whole thing. We've been together for nearly thirty years, and she's thinking about leaving me over something like this? Maybe I should have been more honest, but I was raised to see this as men's business, not something you involve your old lady in.
Am I the asshole?