So the wife and I were getting into it and she told me to talk dirty to her. So I called her a filthy slut.
She said “dirtier!” So I smacked her around and told her I was going to use her like the cheap whore she is.
She said “dirtier!” So I said “I’m gonna stick some SQQQ in your portfolio. I’m gonna put it in long and deep. I’m gonna fill you up with way OTM SPY puts.”
She then slapped me, packed a bag and took the kids. I think we’re getting a divorce.
I used to be a real ad
More WallStreetBets Copypastas
a tesla drives down the street in 2021
the year is 2021
A tesla drives down the street
unknowing of the danger behind it
a beast of American metal and lightning
The driver realizes he is in danger in his commie-fornia shoebox
He presses the pussy pedal as hard as he can
It cannot save him, he can hear the music already
"THIS IS GAWWWWWD'S COUNTRRRRRYYYYYYY"
He realizes he is already dead
In an instant he becomes like a fly in the grill of a truck
In the grill of the Ford F-150 EV
It stops for no one
WallStreetBets
Stimulus talks going well in 2946
The year is 2946, Robot Mitch McConnel and Cyborg Nancy Pelosi report stimulus talks going well.
The Dow rewards them and hits 6.02 x 1023.
WallStreetBets
HODL
🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌕🌘🌑🌒🌕🌑🌑
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🌑🌒🌕🌗🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑
🌑🌒🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌘🌑
🌑🌒🌕🌖🌕🌔🌕🌘🌑
🌑🌒🌕🌗🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑
🌑🌒🌕🌘🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑
🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌑🌔🌕🌖🌑🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌔🌕🌕🌕🌕🌑🌑
🌑🌒🌕🌗🌑🌒🌕🌗🌑
🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑🌑🌕🌗🌑
🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑🌒🌕🌗🌑
🌑🌒🌕🌖🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑
🌑🌑🌓🌕🌕🌕🌖🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌕🌕🌕🌑🌑🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌕🌕🌕🌕🌗🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌕🌖🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑
🌑🌑🌕🌖🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑
🌑🌑🌕🌖🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑
🌑🌑🌕🌗🌑🌕🌕🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌕🌕🌕🌕🌘🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌒🌕🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑🌑🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌓🌕🌘🌑🌑🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌓🌕🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌓🌕🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑
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🌑🌑🌓🌕🌕🌕🌖🌑🌑
🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑🌑
WallStreetBets
Daily WSB trader routine
1. Wake up
2. Check memfolio, buy more PLTR calls
3. Shit while looking at charts, don’t wipe
4. Fomo and buy the top
5. Watch stock Plummet
6. Sell, watch stock go up
7. Go to WSB and downvote everything
8. Jerk off, nut, realize how empty you are
9. Stare at futures for 3 hours
10. Sleep & repeat
WallStreetBets
I couldn’t tell you what half of the companies in my portfolio do
I couldn’t tell you what half of the companies in my portfolio do or even what the ticker stands for...but you better believe I’m jacked to the mf’ing tits in every single meme stonk that you crayon eaters have been pumping. CHOO CHOO MF’ER.