[Copypasta] I hate April Fool's Day

I’m fucking shaking and crying right now y’all, and people aren’t taking me seriously. This is a DUMB FUCKING HOLIDAY, where people say shit that ISN’T FUCKING REAL for NO REASON. I’ve cut off 8 family members already for falling for this shriveled up, half-assed ANNUAL CORPORATE FIG LEAF like the NPC SHEEP THEY ARE. Maybe if they listened to REAL COMEDY like Bill Maher or political satire that validates what I already believe in, they’d be WORTHY OF INTERACTING WITH. BUT NO, I have to scroll through my timeline, seething, wailing and gnashing my teeth as I’m BOMBARDED BY LOW EFFORT CORNY CAPITALIST PROPOGANDA. THIS IS A SERIOUS DAY. I’m allowed to be this pressed about ha-ha corny joke day because IT’S SERIOUS FOR ME AND THEREFORE SHOULD BE FOR EVERYONE. My great uncle was tragically flattened while trying to rob a coca-cola vending machine on this date, and PEOPLE ARE STILL MAKING CORNU FUKUNG JOKES. I’ve had enough
April 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Deserverinos my Bestest Doritorinos

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ᴛʜɪs ɪs ʀᴏʟʟᴀɴᴅ sᴍɪᴛʜ ᴄʀᴇᴀᴛᴏʀ ᴏғ ᴅᴏʀɪᴛᴏs sᴘᴇᴀᴋɪɴɢ ғʀᴏᴍ ɢʀᴀᴠᴇ. ɪ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ sᴀʏ ᴛʜɪs ᴍᴀɴ ᴅᴇsᴇʀᴠᴇʀɪɴᴏs ᴍʏ ʙᴇsᴛᴇsᴛ ᴅᴏʀɪᴛᴏʀɪɴᴏs, ɪ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ᴛʜᴀᴛs ʜᴏᴡ ᴛᴡɪᴛᴄʜ ᴄʜᴀᴛ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅᴇʀɪɴᴏs ᴍʏ ᴍᴇssᴀɢᴇʀɪɴᴏ. ᴏʜ ᴀɴᴅ ᴏʙʟɪɢᴀᴛᴏʀʏ ᴘʟs ɴᴏ ᴄᴏᴘʏ ᴘᴀsᴛᴀʀɪɴᴏ.
twitch chat
July 2014
imaqtpie

This is an absolutely worthless comment

This is an absolutely worthless comment, and yet it has been upvoted. You have contributed absolutely nothing to any semblance of discussion, and your one word comment at the top has taken away from the others who have commented real things below you. I would kindly suggest that you delete your comment and let the others shine
May 2022

Reddit

Does anyone else feels attracted to female avatar profile pictures on reddit?

I don’t know why but I kinda get a little turned on when I see them. There’s something about their design that makes them really adorable and I always try to hold myself back from imagining things about them but I can’t help it. They look so tiny and fluffy with a petite body and short height, cute little outfits, a rounded face, big eyes and pretty hair. Like they’re literally so unironically perfect I feel like reddit made them this way on purpose. I grew a habit of direct messaging anyone who have a nice woman avatar and chatting with them because I imagine the person using the account to look the same. I’m not even typing this out to sound like a weirdo i genuinely feel this way and I do hope that I’m not being weird for it. Please tell me there’s someone who feels the same thing
May 2022

Reddit

Fortnite default dance 3

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣿⣿⠶⠀⠀⣀⣀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⣀⣶⣤⣤⠿⠶⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣉⣿⣿ ⠿⣉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⣤⣿⣿⣿⣀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣛⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⣿⠿⠀⣿⣿⣿⠛ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⠿⣿⠀⠀⣿⣶ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠛⠀⠀⣿⣿⣶ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⣿⣿⠤ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿
November 2018

Fortnite Default Dance

Fortnite

have you ever had a dream like this?

have you 👉🏿 ever 😠 had a dreams 😴💭- thats ✔- that you 👉🏻👤 uhm 😤 you 👈 had you 👈- you 👈 could- you 👈 do what you 👉 want 😍- you 👈 could do- so you 👈👦- you 👈 do- you 👈 could do you 🤖👈- you 👸👉 wan 🔑- you 👸👉 want 😋 him 👴 to do so much 🔥 that you 👉 could do anything 💰?
April 2021

Emoji Pasta

Text-to-Speech Playing