[Copypasta] I hate April Fool's Day

I’m fucking shaking and crying right now y’all, and people aren’t taking me seriously. This is a DUMB FUCKING HOLIDAY, where people say shit that ISN’T FUCKING REAL for NO REASON. I’ve cut off 8 family members already for falling for this shriveled up, half-assed ANNUAL CORPORATE FIG LEAF like the NPC SHEEP THEY ARE. Maybe if they listened to REAL COMEDY like Bill Maher or political satire that validates what I already believe in, they’d be WORTHY OF INTERACTING WITH. BUT NO, I have to scroll through my timeline, seething, wailing and gnashing my teeth as I’m BOMBARDED BY LOW EFFORT CORNY CAPITALIST PROPOGANDA. THIS IS A SERIOUS DAY. I’m allowed to be this pressed about ha-ha corny joke day because IT’S SERIOUS FOR ME AND THEREFORE SHOULD BE FOR EVERYONE. My great uncle was tragically flattened while trying to rob a coca-cola vending machine on this date, and PEOPLE ARE STILL MAKING CORNU FUKUNG JOKES. I’ve had enough
April 2021
I used to be a real ad
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ACHOO uh oh you just got the Delta variant!

ACHOO‼️🤧🤧What was that⁉️⁉️😏😏Uh-oh 😯 looks like you just got 👀👀 the Delta variant! 🙀😜😜 Don’t you know 🇺🇸⁉️🤢🤕🤒🤤 the world 🌍 HOE Organization 🙈👅 called it the most DOMINANT 👊🏼👊🏼 strain since the start of the 🗓 PANTIE-DEMIC 👄👌👈 No more touching daddy 😩😩 🧓🏼 until you wash 🧽🧽your dirty 🐾nasty 🤢 little 🤞🏼fingers ✋🏻🤚🏻✋🏻🤚🏻for 6️⃣9️⃣ seconds with sHOEp 🧼 and water 💧 👅 otherwise it doesn’t count 🤡🤡🤡 Time to stop 🛑 spreading the germs 🤮🥴🤒and start spreading 😧your legs🤤🦶🏽🦵🏻because everyone 👩‍🦰👨‍🏫🦹🏾‍♂️🧜🏼‍♂️has to keep TWERKING 😈😈from home! 🏡 SEND THIS TO 1️⃣0️⃣ other coronavirus cucks 👉🏾👌🏻otherwise Fuckboy Fauci 🙀🙀 is cumming for you 🍆🍑🍆
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Emoji Pasta

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I’m a zoomer! Not a shady millenial or a boomer

twitchquotes: I’m a zoomer! Not a shady millenial or a boomer. I’m a zoomer, not a Gen X’r. Born in the 21th century. I’m a zoomer, i’m yeething and sheeting and peeting and reating. I’m a zoomer, we use internet since we were born. Dancing like fortnight! I’m a zoomer, we don’t know 9/11. I’m a zoomer, we are the 9 year olds. I’m a zoomer!
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November 2019

Hey Imaqtpie, I think you should play Kogmaw

twitchquotes: Hey imaqtpie, theres a new champ named kogmaw who i think would be perfect for your playstyle. Kogmaw is capable of doing damage after hes been killed and I think you could really benefit from that passive ability. Hope this helps!
twitch chat
June 2019
imaqtpie

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twitchquotes: If 700,000 people die in hospitals every year. Why don't we close down these hospitals and prevent those deaths? (つ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)つ
twitch chat
April 2015
imaqtpie

Torture dance 2

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣴⣧⣤⣴⡖⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠘⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢤⣴⣦⣄⣀⣀⣴⣿⡟⢿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠙⠻⠿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠈⢀⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠉⠋⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⣶⣿⣿⠿⢛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣶⣷⣿⣿⡉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠛⠟⢿⣤⣤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
April 2019

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure Torture Dance

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure

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