Listen 5 years ago I wanted to get into investing. I came to this sub to get some advice. One guy helped me with a stock I could invest in.
It was dipping for a few days and I kept asking what I should do and he said hold. Kept quoting Warren buffet
On the third day I panicked and told him I had to sell. He sent me a video and told me to watch it before I sold.
It was a guy getting railed by jpow.
I lost 400 dollars that day but it taught me some lessons.
Now look at me. Been investing for over 3 years now. I was even on this gme thing. Yeah I could of made 8x the profits instead of 4 but I consider that my own fault.
But through this great sub and everything I have learned, I reinvested my profits and as of today
I am down 5 grand. Thats why this place is so special.
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More WallStreetBets Copypastas
Apple announces an EV program
Oh boy I can't wait until 2024 when I can wake up to my Apple Homepod Siri alarm and check my Apple Watch for notifications and take a shower in my Apple Big Douche then put my makeup on before work in my Apple Mirror then take my Apple Car to my job at Apple Phone Plant #584 so I can work on my Mac Pro workstation designing the latest Apple Product the iShit smart toilet that syncs with your iAsshole to sense when you have a massive log brewing in my large intestine and sends me a notification to my apple colonoscopy bag. Russian hackers will know what I had for dinner.
WallStreetBets
Don't use the "F word" on the trade floor
Just heard an employee use the βF wordβ on the trade floor, and immediately fired them. Maybe other funds will tolerate that kind of language, but donβt you dare talk about Fundamentals here.
WallStreetBets
Am I the asshole for dropping my 6 year old son at an orphanage for his inability to trade options?
This started about 4 years ago when my son was 2 years old. I started to supplement his picture books and cartoons with beginner options books and Martin Shkerli's live videos on how to pick pharmaceutical stocks. Over the course of these years I feel like he has retained absolutely nothing even though I have spent every waking minute trying to make him understand. I have done almost everything that I have thought of including having Jerome Powell's speeches play while he is sleeping and only having Warren Buffet on the TV to try and make him understand the market. I felt as though I got to a breaking point when he couldn't differentiate between a straddle and a strangle even though we we went through different strategies for almost a month straight. I finally convinced my wife that we were doing the right thing when I said that he will soon be a Wendy's worker begging his wife's husband for a weekly allowance because he will never amount to be anything. I couldn't fathom raising a kid who was not able to able to make a profit from trading options by the time he was 10. With all that said if anyone wants a 6 year old child who is shitty at market strategy check out Eternal Sunny Orphanage in Omaha, Nebraska and maybe your luck will be better than mine with him.
Am I The Asshole?
WallStreetBets
Stock space rocket
.γγγγγγγγγγ β¦ γγγγββ γ
γγγΛγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ*γγγγγγ
βγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγγ. γγβγγγγγγγ
β¦ γγγγγγγγγγ γ β β β β γγγγ γγγγγγγγγγγγ,γγβββγ
.γγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγοΎγββγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγ.
γγγγγγ,γγγγγγγ.γγγγγγββββγγγγ
γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγββοΈ γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγβββ
γββββββγγγγγββββββββγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.
γγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγ.
γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγβββββββγβββγγγγ γγγγγγγγγγγγγ
γγβββββββγβββγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγβββββββγβββ β¦
βββγγγ,γγγγγγγγγγ[stock ticker]π γγγγ γγ,γγγ β β β β γ
γγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγβγγ γγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγβγββββ
ββββββγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγΛγγγ γ ββγγγγ,γγγγγγ
γγγγβββββββγββββγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγ
βγγββββγγγγγβγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ* γγ
ββγγγγγ β¦ γγγγγγγβββββββββγββββββββγγγγ γγβγ
γγγγγβγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγββββγγ.
γβγγγγγ.γγγγ π
γγγγγβββγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγββ
γΛγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγοΎγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγγγγγ
. γγβγ π β β β β β β β β β β ,γ γγγγγγγγγγγγγγ*
.γγγγγβγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.γγγγγγγγγγ β¦ γγγγββ γ
γγγΛγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ*γγγγγγβ βγγγγγγγγγγγγγγγ.
WallStreetBets
Bullish market makes me hard
When the stocks ππ go up ππΈ, my dick goes too πβ¬οΈπ³. Bullish π market π¬ makes me hard π¦΄π¦. All the countries π³οΈπ΄π΄ββ οΈππ©π³οΈβππ³οΈββ§οΈπΊπ³ try to recover π from corona π¦ so the money π°π΅πΈ flows π¬ into my pocket π³. Soon π there will be a crash πππ₯Ίπ and the bears π» will crawl πΌ out of their holes π³. Then they cut off my greedy dick βοΈππ©Έ if I donβt β eat βem out π
πΈ. I must turn into a bear πβ‘οΈπ» and make π€πΌ more money π°π΅πΈ and eat some honey π»π―. When Iβm done β
Iβll throw a party ππ·πΎ and eat your ass π
π.