[Copypasta] What if TF2 injuries were more realistic?

Just imagine: You are playing 2fort as RED team and pick heavy, you get out of spawn when suddenly a Pyro with the Homewrecker hits you square on the head. Your Heavy falls down and makes a weird snoring sound and has a nasty gash in his head with clear fluid running out of his ears. Then for like 30 minutes the screen goes black and you hear Heavy being transported into an ambulance. After the 30 mins Heavy opens his eyes a little. It looks like hes in the ICU and is currently getting artificially ventilated. Then the screen goes black again for 3 days until Heavy opens his eyes a little to see a woman, presumably heavys wife, crying beside his bed. She says something but it seems like Heavy doesnt understand anything she is saying, only thing you clearly make out is "permanent brain damage" and how sorry she is for never talking you out of your Mercenary profession. Then the screen goes black for another 5 months with some short times of conciousness inbetween until you see the same woman with 2 kids talking to your doctor in the ICU. All you can make out is that they decided to end your suffering and pull the plug. The last thing you see is heavys eyes closing, until you suddenly respawn in RED Spawn.
January 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Faceful Void

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘ โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘ โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘ โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–„โ–โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘ โ–โ–Œโ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–โ–‘ โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–Œโ–โ–€ โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
June 2015

Dota 2

I dropped my deck of playing cards

twitchquotes: แดฌโ™ฅ โดโ™ฃ ยณโ™ฅ โดโ™ฅ ยนโฐโ™ฃ แดถโ™  โถโ™  แ‘ซโ™ฅ โธโ™ฆ โนโ™ฆ โดโ™  โตโ™ฅ แดทโ™  โตโ™ฃ โตโ™ฆ ยฒโ™ฆ โตโ™  แ‘ซโ™  ยณโ™  โถโ™ฅ โ–ผ โถโ™ฃ ยนโฐโ™ฅ โถโ™ฆ I dropped my deck of playing cards โทโ™ฅ แดฌโ™  โทโ™ฃ ยณโ™ฆ แดทโ™ฃ โทโ™ฆ ยฒโ™  โทโ™  โธโ™ฅ ยฒโ™ฃ แดทโ™ฅ โธโ™ฃ โดโ™ฆ ยนโฐโ™ฆ โธโ™  โนโ™ฅ แดฌโ™ฃ โนโ™ฃ ยณโ™ฃ โนโ™  ยนโฐโ™ฅ ยนโฐโ™ฆ ยนโฐโ™  แดถโ™ฅ แดฌโ™ฆ ยฒโ™ฅ แดถโ™ฃ แดถโ™ฆ แ‘ซโ™ฃ แ‘ซโ™ฆ แดทโ™ฆ แดทโ™ 
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

Middle fingers

โ•ญโˆฉโ•ฎ๏ผˆ๏ธถ_๏ธถ๏ผ‰โ•ญโˆฉโ•ฎ
ascii art
July 2019

The emotion of the topdeck, the salt of the defeat

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp remember you don't play for the gold or for the wins, you play to feel the emotion on the topdick, the PJSalt on the defeat, you live for the BM, because you can be one with your cards, but mostly because at least through the match you're free. plz no linguini
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

Ben Shapiro sings Rick Roll

Lets say, hypothetically, that we were not strangers to love, and lets say, you knew the rules and so did i. And if you thought of a full commitment, you wouldnt get this from any other guy, right? Then hypothetically speaking, i just want to tell you how im feeling. Now lets say i gotta make you understand. Now that we've established that im never gonna give you up or let you down. Am i not correct? You would never run around, and desert you. And i, as a balcony, think that i wouldnt make you cry, so i must be the one to never tell a lie, and hurt you This would mean that, we've known eachother for so long, and logically, your hearts been aching but, youre too shy to say it. which would proceed with both of us knowing whats been going on. Which didnt make sense, we know the game, in a way that we're gonna play it. Yet, if you ask me how im feeling, seeing as you shouldnt say that youre too blind to see
December 2020

Ben Shapiro

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