[Copypasta] What if TF2 injuries were more realistic?

Just imagine: You are playing 2fort as RED team and pick heavy, you get out of spawn when suddenly a Pyro with the Homewrecker hits you square on the head. Your Heavy falls down and makes a weird snoring sound and has a nasty gash in his head with clear fluid running out of his ears. Then for like 30 minutes the screen goes black and you hear Heavy being transported into an ambulance. After the 30 mins Heavy opens his eyes a little. It looks like hes in the ICU and is currently getting artificially ventilated. Then the screen goes black again for 3 days until Heavy opens his eyes a little to see a woman, presumably heavys wife, crying beside his bed. She says something but it seems like Heavy doesnt understand anything she is saying, only thing you clearly make out is "permanent brain damage" and how sorry she is for never talking you out of your Mercenary profession. Then the screen goes black for another 5 months with some short times of conciousness inbetween until you see the same woman with 2 kids talking to your doctor in the ICU. All you can make out is that they decided to end your suffering and pull the plug. The last thing you see is heavys eyes closing, until you suddenly respawn in RED Spawn.
January 2021
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

This gentleman's deck is ABSURD!

twitchquotes: ☑ “This gentleman's deck is ABSURD!” ☑ “My deck cannot hope to prevail against a deck of that caliber” ☑ "He REQUIRED those two cards in subsequent order to succeed" ☑ “He extracted from his deck the only cards capable of defeating me” ☑ "His cards defied logic" ☑ “There was no manoeuvre at my disposal to secure victory” ☑ “I played impeccably”
twitch chat
October 2014

Hearthstone

This Copypasta Is CRAZY!

Nigerian Prince Haseem

twitchquotes: Hi I am Nigerian Prince Haseem, i have 200 million dollars but cannot see, if you would do my runes i would share all my riches with you. Just email me your rune page and password
twitch chat
July 2014
Dyrus

Hello I'm 13 year old from asia, name Lee Cheng Yun

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ɪᴍ 13 ʏᴇᴀʀ ᴏʟᴅ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴀsɪᴀ, ɴᴀᴍᴇ ʟᴇᴇ ᴄʜᴇɴɢ ʏᴜɴ. ɪ ɴᴏ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅ ᴡʜʏ ᴀʟʟ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇ ᴛʜɪɴɢ ᴅɪғғᴇʀᴇɴᴛ ғᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇᴍsᴇʟғ? ᴡʜʏ ᴀʟʟ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇ sᴛᴜᴘɪᴅ ғᴀᴄᴇs ɪɴ ᴛʜɪs ᴄʜᴀᴛ? ɪ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ʜᴇʀᴇ ғᴏʀ ᴄʜᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴀʀᴅs ɪɴ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛʜsᴛᴏɴᴇ, ɪ ᴏᴘᴇɴ ᴘᴀᴄᴋ ғɪɴᴅ ᴍɪʟʜᴏᴜsᴇ ᴀɴᴅ ᴜsᴇ ɪɴ ᴍʏ ᴢᴏᴏ ᴅᴇᴄᴋ.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Let's snipe

twitchquotes: "PARFAIT!", says the Chief of the French Police. "We now have ze best one! Come my friend, together we can stop ze terrorists! Welcome to our ZNIPER TEAM!!". A smile appears on HufferNudes face. "Let's snipe".
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

NOW RISE, DARTH DONGER

twitchquotes: ༼ ͡༼ل͜༽༽ NOW RISE, DARTH DONGER. /{▀益▀}\ Where is Reynad? Is he okay? ༼ ͡༼ ̯ʖ༽༽ It seems in your Spam, you killed him. /{▀益▀}\ What!? HE WAS ALIVE! I FELT IT. Noooooooooooo! ༼ ͡༼ل͜༽༽
twitch chat
September 2015
Reynad
Text-to-Speech Playing