[Copypasta] What if TF2 injuries were more realistic?

Just imagine: You are playing 2fort as RED team and pick heavy, you get out of spawn when suddenly a Pyro with the Homewrecker hits you square on the head. Your Heavy falls down and makes a weird snoring sound and has a nasty gash in his head with clear fluid running out of his ears. Then for like 30 minutes the screen goes black and you hear Heavy being transported into an ambulance. After the 30 mins Heavy opens his eyes a little. It looks like hes in the ICU and is currently getting artificially ventilated. Then the screen goes black again for 3 days until Heavy opens his eyes a little to see a woman, presumably heavys wife, crying beside his bed. She says something but it seems like Heavy doesnt understand anything she is saying, only thing you clearly make out is "permanent brain damage" and how sorry she is for never talking you out of your Mercenary profession. Then the screen goes black for another 5 months with some short times of conciousness inbetween until you see the same woman with 2 kids talking to your doctor in the ICU. All you can make out is that they decided to end your suffering and pull the plug. The last thing you see is heavys eyes closing, until you suddenly respawn in RED Spawn.
January 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Romanian Salt Baron

twitchquotes: POLICE REPORT - Canadian Mounties have at last apprehended the "Romanian Salt Baron" after suspiciously salty whining was heard outside of a dingy apartment in Toronto. The Salt Baron, a morose, balding gypsy man, was at the time playing a children's card game when Mounties burst through the door. The man attempted to resist by "brofisting" the officials, but his scrawny vegan arms had no effect. The man's wife then assumed her true Succubus form and escaped into the Nether. More at 11.
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July 2016
Kripp

WE DIDIN'T START THE KAPPA

twitchquotes: ヽ༼✿◕ل͜◕༽ノ WE DIDIN'T START THE KAPPA ヽ༼✿◕ل͜◕༽ノ IT WAS ALREADY SPREADING THE MOMENT WE GOT HERE ヽ༼✿◕ل͜◕༽ノ
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

Don't mind me taking my IKE for a walk

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ___[NAIR][NAIR] Don't mind me taking my IKE for a walk
twitch chat
February 2019

Super Smash Bros

Ratge

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠻⣻⣻⠁⠀⡄⠬⠍⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠀⠀⡔⠛⠛⠒⠦⠀⠈⠛⢄⣈⣧⠤⣀⠀⠘⣾⢛⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡏⠀⠘⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢉⠔⠉⡈⠉⠛⡷⠁⣤⡀⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣷⠀⠀⠈⠳⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⠀⣸⠻⡆⠀⠈⠀⣿⣩⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣷⡶⣾⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢳⡀⠿⠞⠀⠀⠀⡦⣈⣁⣠⣔⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣹⠃⠀⠀⣀⡀⡀⠀⢰⡀⠸⣑⢤⣀⣠⡤⠎⠙⠲⠯⣭⡋⠛⠿⣿⣿⣟⣿ ⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⢉⠟⠉⠛⢯⣛⠉⠛⠛⠛⠋⠙⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣄⣀⣹ ⣿⡏⠈⠉⠉⢹⠉⠙⣭⣉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠿⠿⠿⠿⠶⠒⠒⣒⣚⣫⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠈⢧⣀⡀⠉⠙⠓⠒⠒⠒⠒⠒⠛⢛⣉⣉⣭⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠙⠛⠓⠖⠲⠒⠒⣛⣭⣿⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠤⠤⠴⠶⠖⠚⠉⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
July 2021

⚠️ ATTENTION ALL MEN: Be EXTREMELY careful you ONLY buy shower products FOR MEN.

December 2021
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