[Copypasta] Sneed's Feed & Seed

The Cocklock Deck

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, its the "cocklock" you just beat. I'm on the phone with my mom right now, and she isn't very happy with you. She is coming over now to comfort me, and then we are going to have to report you to the police. I hope you enjoy jail.

twitch chat

December 2014

Kripp

You toss and turn as Elon gently rubs your shoulders

You toss and turn as Elon gently rubs your shoulders. "You seem a little tense" says Elon, as you look at your bank account. Your phone shows $107 left to your name. You think to yourself while Elon rubs you down, you pull open Robin Hood, type in TSLA. Leaps $900 JAN 2023' are only $1 you can afford 1 leap. This is finally your chance to get rich, you'll be able to actually buy a Tesla. You ask Elon what the next Tesla will be. He says "U, for 'you'" as he smiles sweetly. You picture him dancing on stage explaining U S3XY to everyone multiple times as you smile back at him. All of a sudden Elon flips on the TV to CNBC to catch the tail end of Jim Cramer, you see a new law has been passed, "we believe options have inflated the markets into a bubble, we will be imposing a new rule next week only allowing accounts that qualify for day trades to also purchase options with a $25,000 barrier to entry." You start weeping aloud, you feel a caring hand wipe your tear away, it's Elon again, "what's wrong my little X'√π3?" Suddenly you wake, you're in a pool of sweat, at first you panic about the new options policy, then you're filled with relief realizing that options aren't restricted it was all a dream. You realize this was actually a vision to earn 200,000% gains to buy a TSLA leap. You log into RH, it welcomes you with your $107 balance, you plug in TSLA yolo 2023 @ $900 and realize the options are actually $20 each. The best you can do is $900 TSLA weekly expiring around Christmas. In a slight fit of despair you try to remember the feeling of Elon rubbing your cheek, and rub one out onto your stomach, then roll over back to sleep. A single tear rolls from your eye into your waifu pillow. YOLO you whisper.

December 2020

WallStreetBets

Coated like a plasterer's radio

twitchquotes: After having my birth cannon pounded, he then proceeded to raid my poo pipe. My stench trench was trembling like a rat on acid. The seemingly never-ending streams of gentleman's relish emanating from his thrill drill soon had me coated like a plasterer's radio

twitch chat

November 2014

Forsen

Spider

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ascii art

November 2014

It's Raining Positivity!

twitchquotes: ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ (◕‿◕✿)ﾉ☂ It's Raining Positivity ヽ(◕‿◕✿)ﾉ☂ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿

twitch chat

October 2014

Kripp

[Copypasta] Sneed's Feed & Seed

The Cocklock Deck

You toss and turn as Elon gently rubs your shoulders

WallStreetBets

Coated like a plasterer's radio

Spider

It's Raining Positivity!

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