Ok, so l-let's say, hypothetically, for the sake of the argument, that, perhaps, I, Ben, was to ask you, Stacy, to the prom, right now. Now let me ask you, in that situation, would it not be in your best interest to say yes? I mean the answer is obvious, right? Now let's suppose, that in fact, I was doing so right now, in this room. Now, hypothetically, what would your response be?
(βΜΏΔΉΜ―ββ¬β΄β¬β΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Ben Shapiro Copypastas
Ben Shapiro's naughty girl
Let's say you've been a bad girl. Let's say, hypothetically, you've been a naughty girl even. Ok, and if you were a naughty girl, you would be my dirty little slut right? Then hypothetically speaking, you would be my little cumslut. Now, let's say you're also daddy's girl.
Now that we have established that you are both a bad girl and daddy's girl, I believe you'd agree with me when I say that you deserve a spanking. Am I not correct? A bad girl deserves a spanking, and as I am daddy, you are my girl, so I am the one who must provide punishment.
Ben Shapiro
Ben Shapiro Kung Fu Fighting
Let's say for a minute, that hypothetically, everyone was in fact kung fu fighting. Now statistically speaking of course, this is impossible. Now hypothetically if they were, hypothetically of course. Now, would they all be performing the same so called Kung Fu move? Statistically speaking that is highly unlikely. This would also, hypothetically, be quite dangerous if it were to actually occur. Coming from a medical official, my wife, who is a doctor, she says that hypothetically, this would be dangerous. So, logically, this would not happen. So in fact, there is no way, impossible even, that everybody was Kung Fu Fighting.
Ben Shapiro
Ben Shapiro asks his mom for Robux
Now, letβs say π£ hypothetically, you π, my mother πͺ. Were to give π me, your 
son πββοΈ, your credit πΈ card π³ information ππΌ. So I π₯ could make π a purchase π² of 500 π― robux π on the Roblox.com/store. Contrary to what my sister π±ββοΈ will have you π believe π
π», I π₯ have done β
a very βΌ good π job πββοΈπ€΅ of doing my chores π§Ό, including π², but π not limited π to; The dishes π³π½ππΌ, the laundry and the taking π out the trash βΉοΈββοΈπΆπ.
son πββοΈ, your credit πΈ card π³ information ππΌ. So I π₯ could make π a purchase π² of 500 π― robux π on the Roblox.com/store. Contrary to what my sister π±ββοΈ will have you π believe π
π», I π₯ have done β
a very βΌ good π job πββοΈπ€΅ of doing my chores π§Ό, including π², but π not limited π to; The dishes π³π½ππΌ, the laundry and the taking π out the trash βΉοΈββοΈπΆπ.
Ben Shapiro
Ben Shapiro asks his mom to buy him the Lego Death Star
Alright mom, you think that the Lego Death Star is too expensive of a set for my birthday which hypothetically- hypothetically lets take a look at the facts (which don't care about your feelings) in a situation where, hypothetically, you get it for my birthday. So, we take a look at the numbers it's $499.99 but it has 4,016 pieces, and that means it comes down to a price point of about 12.4 cents per piece and that's a fact, that's a fact (that doesn't care about your feelings). And even though that might be seemingly pricey in comparison to other lego sets, lets take a look at the minifigures. We have Han Solo in a Stormtrooper outfit, we have Luke Skywalker also in a Stormtrooper outfit, these are exclusives for the set since 2001. And it's a fact that you can recreate epic scenes- hypothetically, hypothetically, from A New Hope and Return of The Jedi if I had this set and I think the facts add up, that you should buy me this set (regardless of your feelings)
Ben Shapiro
Ben Shapiro counts to one million
So today, for the first time, my little toddler finally counted to ten. Everyone was celebrating, saying how proud they are in my kid, and then Ben Shapiro kicks open the door. "Oh you think it's impressive that they can count to ten? I can count to one million." and then proceeded, in my living room for the next two weeks, to count to one million. He then said "yep, another libtard destroyed" and then curbstomped my kid.