I am beyond fucking angry right now. As I type this message I can physically feel my muscles tensing and my blood pressure rising. Why the fuck would you call me a "simp"? I've never even fucking watched The Simpsons. Not one fucking episode. I hope you retract that statement, because i'd never refer to you as a dick for not watching Dick and Dom in da Bungalow.
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More Copypastas
You can't be kicked from an Among Us game
Did you know that InnerSloth (the owner of Among Us) says that you can't actually be kicked from a game by the owner? Section 34 of their TOS states that any individual who purchases a copy of the game has a right to play the game, and cannot be prevented from playing games by any individual. If you've kicked from a game recently, or want to learn more, google "Among Us rule 34"
Among Us / Amogus
Hi Kripp, this is OJ, your long lost brother
twitchquotes:
ʜɪ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs ᴏᴊ, ʏᴏᴜʀ ʟᴏɴɢ ʟᴏsᴛ ʙʀᴏᴛʜᴇʀ. ɪ ғᴏᴜɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴠɪᴀ ᴘᴏʀɴʜᴜʙ ᴀɴᴅ ɪ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ ɢᴇᴛ ɪɴ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴀᴄᴛ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɢᴀɪɴ ᴀɴᴅ ɢɪᴠᴇ ᴘᴀᴘᴘᴀʀɪᴀɴ ᴀ ʜᴜɢ. ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ʟᴇᴛs ʙᴏɴᴅ ᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜ ᴘᴏʀɴ ᴛᴏɢᴇᴛʜᴇʀ ᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴘᴏʀɴʜᴜʙs, ɪ ʜᴇᴀʀᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇʀᴇ sᴛᴀʀʀɪɴɢ ᴏɴᴇ... ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ʀᴇᴘʟʏ ᴀsᴀᴘ ᴏᴄᴛᴀᴠɪᴀɴ, ʏᴏᴜʀ ʟᴏᴠɪɴɢ ʙʀᴏᴛʜᴇʀ - ᴏᴊ.
twitch chat
Kripp
This is agent Kappachino from the Kappa agency
twitchquotes:
Hi this is agent Kappachino from the 
agency. I would like to inform you that we have detected the KPM (Kappa Per Minute) to be far below the minimum level of 100 KPM. Please fix this by typing or agents will be dispatched to donger this stream
agency. I would like to inform you that we have detected the KPM (Kappa Per Minute) to be far below the minimum level of 100 KPM. Please fix this by typing or agents will be dispatched to donger this stream
twitch chat
imaqtpie
Having to call a judge “your honor” is so cringey (found on /r/unpopularopinion)
“Your Honor”. I mean gimmie a fuckin’ break, dude. What else do you want me to call you? Your highness? Do you want me to fondle your nuts while I blow you, too?
I’ve seriously seen courtrooms where they’ll say “Sir” and the judge will be like “It’s “Your Honor” young man!!”
Fuck off. How much of an egotist you gotta be to care about some medieval-ass title? Use “Sir” like everybody else.
It’s some LARPING I’d expect kids to do. “Oh Billy you have to call me supreme ruler snorlax the magical wizard!!1!”
Shut up.
EDIT: I’m literally 22 and have never been in front of a judge, y’all, please relax and slow down with the theory crafting/ story writing.
EDIT 2: A lot of people are saying “it’s just a title, like Doctor!”. Judges have a title like “Doctor”, it’s called “Judge” - Doctors don’t expect us to call them “Thy Healer” or some crap like that.
Summit i am a chicken from cs go
twitchquotes:
Summit i am a chicken from cs go ... i barely survived inferno ... i just want you and ur friends stop killlin my chickens or im gonna peck the sh1t out of you .My dream is to travel from A sight to B at my friend horse near construction without getting hurt together with my chicks and u always ruin it... please copy paste and stop this madness , let a chicken cross inferno my brothers
twitch chat
Summt1g