[Copypasta] I've never even watched The Simpsons

I am beyond fucking angry right now. As I type this message I can physically feel my muscles tensing and my blood pressure rising. Why the fuck would you call me a "simp"? I've never even fucking watched The Simpsons. Not one fucking episode. I hope you retract that statement, because i'd never refer to you as a dick for not watching Dick and Dom in da Bungalow.
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Hello Kripp, this is Juan Jose Manuel Torres Esteban Rodriguez Ochoa Martinez Lopez Jr

twitchquotes: ะฝello ฤธrฮนpp, jฯ…an joั•รฉ ะผanฯ…el ั‚orreั• eั•ั‚eะฒan rodrฮนgฯ…ez ocะฝoa ะผarั‚ฮนnez lopez jr. ะฝere. ฮน no lฮนฤธe yoฯ…r cะฝaั‚. pleaั•e า“rฮนendั•, no ะผore ั•paะผะผerฮนno ฮนn cะฝaั‚erฮนno oฤธ aะผฮนgo? or elั•e ฮน ะฝop ะฒorderฮนno. no cappฯ…ccฮนno.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times.

I have noticed that, although this planet has 3.8 billion women, I have not had sex 3.8 billion times. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to 'fuck' me. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to 'fuck' me in my recent years. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
August 2021

Meeting Kripp at the urinals

twitchquotes: hey "kripp" we met at the urinals at the taco bell in LA..i asked you if i could shake your donger and you never responded...please confirm and we can meet again thanks
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Pikachu

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€ โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–€ โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆ โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€
September 2016

Pokemon

Alien through telescope

twitchquotes: AlienPls โ € ๏พŸโ €*โ € ๏ฝกโ € โ €๏พŸโ €๏ฝก โ € โ €โ € โ˜†โ € โ €โ˜…โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € ๏ฝฅ๏พŸโ € โ € โ € โ˜…โ € ๏ฝก๏ฝฅโ €โ €โ €๏พŸโ €โ €๏ฝกโ € โ €โ €โ € โ € โ˜…โ € โ € ๏ฝฅ๏ฝฅโ €โ € โ € โˆดโ €โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € ๏พŸโ € โ € โ € *โ €๏พŸโ €โ €โ €โ˜…โ €โ €โ € ๏ฝก๏ฝฅโ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €I CANT BELIEVE MY EYES ๐Ÿ”ญ OMEGALUL ๓ €€ ๓ €€
twitch chat
October 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing