[Copypasta] I've never even watched The Simpsons

I am beyond fucking angry right now. As I type this message I can physically feel my muscles tensing and my blood pressure rising. Why the fuck would you call me a "simp"? I've never even fucking watched The Simpsons. Not one fucking episode. I hope you retract that statement, because i'd never refer to you as a dick for not watching Dick and Dom in da Bungalow.
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

One chat, under Kripp, unbannable, with OJ and BM for all

twitchquotes: ヽ༼☑ل͜☑༽ノ I pledge allegiance to the chat of the United States of Kripparian, and to the Spammerino for which it stands, one chat, under Kripp, unbannable, with OJ and BM for all ヽ༼☑ل͜☑༽ノ
twitch chat
August 2014
Kripp

My wife told me to talk dirty to her

So the wife and I were getting into it and she told me to talk dirty to her. So I called her a filthy slut. She said “dirtier!” So I smacked her around and told her I was going to use her like the cheap whore she is. She said “dirtier!” So I said “I’m gonna stick some SQQQ in your portfolio. I’m gonna put it in long and deep. I’m gonna fill you up with way OTM SPY puts.” She then slapped me, packed a bag and took the kids. I think we’re getting a divorce.
April 2021

WallStreetBets

Kripp.... how do I say this

twitchquotes: Kripp.... how do I say this. You aren't as good as you used to be, your quality of both decks and play have deteriorated significantly. At this point I think I'm a better player than you which makes me very sad. Your decks have no balance between curve and minion quality, tar creeper?! Really? In zoo! As much as you sell it as one, zoo is not a control deck. At least not a conventional one.
twitch chat
August 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Qtpie, this is your dad here

twitchquotes: qtpie, this is your dad here. i just wanted to say how proud of you i am son, always hiding in your room playing your video games, talking to your internet friends. your mom and i think that's swell and we just wanted to let you know we love you. pls no copy dadderino
twitch chat
March 2016
imaqtpie

League of Legends

mizkifSmile

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣴⣶⣶⣶⣦⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⡿⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢰⣿⣿⣄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣆⣀⣼⣿⡟⠁⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⠿⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠉⠉⠉⠙⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣷⣆⠄⠐⠄⣄⣠⡄⣠⣤⡄⣴⣦⣀⣤⣠⣴⢰⠄⠄⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣆⠄⠄⠈⣈⠃⠻⢿⡷⣿⣿⠿⠋⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄ ⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⠄⠈⠙⠾⠿⢿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠋⠁⢀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄ ⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⣛⣛⣛⣛⣛⣋⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣝⣛⡋⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠿⣛⣭⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄
November 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing