I am beyond fucking angry right now. As I type this message I can physically feel my muscles tensing and my blood pressure rising. Why the fuck would you call me a "simp"? I've never even fucking watched The Simpsons. Not one fucking episode. I hope you retract that statement, because i'd never refer to you as a dick for not watching Dick and Dom in da Bungalow.
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas
Hello Michael Santana, this is your local tax officer
twitchquotes:
Hello Michael Santana, this is your local tax officer. Your last reply as to why you haven't paid your taxes is unnacceptable. "I'll check it out later" and "You know how I get down" are NOT valid excuses. We are sending our men over RIGHT NOW to start repossessing your house.
twitch chat
imaqtpie
My husband of 5 years bought me Reddit Gold for my anniversary
My 5-Year anniversary with my husband was last week. The traditional gift for 5 years is silverware. I wanted a new set and told my husband which he could get me as a gift. I knew he wanted an Apple Watch and bought that as my gift to him.
On the day of our anniversary, I logged onto Reddit to find dozens of my posts and comments guilded. I found it odd as I don’t post terribly often and the guilded comments were old. It’s also the first time I’ve received Reddit gold.
When the time came to exchange gifts, he gleefully opened his Apple Watch and begin setting it up. I figured I’m all the excitement he forgot to give me my gift so I gently prodded him. He told me to check Reddit.
Ladies and Gentlemen, my husband GUILDED me 24 times as an anniversary gift. He’s a bit of a jokester, so I figured my real gift was coming.
But Reddit, it’s been a week. Do I say something? Buy the silverware myself? Some combination of the two? I feel if I don’t say something then the cycle will repeat itself.
Hey Aui, I'm trying to learn visage
twitchquotes:
Hey Aui, I'm trying to learn visage. Should I max grave chill like the chill that run up your spine when you found you were kicked from EG, soul assumption like EG swallowed up your soul and spat it out, gravekeeper's clock like EG cloaked their intent to kick you, or summon familiars like EG summoned a familiar player in RTZ to replace you?
twitch chat
Aui_2000
Dota 2
Salty tofu
twitch chat
Kripp
Among Us is ruining my fucking life
I can't fucking take it any more. Among Us has singlehandedly ruined my life. The other day my teacher was teaching us Greek Mythology and he mentioned a pegasus and I immediately thought 'Pegasus? more like Mega Sus!!!!' and I've never wanted to kms more. I can't look at a vent without breaking down and fucking crying. I can't eat pasta without thinking 'IMPASTA??? THATS PRETTY SUS!!!!' Skit 4 by Kanye West. The lyrics ruined me. A Mongoose, or the 25th island of greece. The scientific name for pig. I can't fucking take it anymore.
Please fucking end my suffering.