[Copypasta] I've never even watched The Simpsons

I am beyond fucking angry right now. As I type this message I can physically feel my muscles tensing and my blood pressure rising. Why the fuck would you call me a "simp"? I've never even fucking watched The Simpsons. Not one fucking episode. I hope you retract that statement, because i'd never refer to you as a dick for not watching Dick and Dom in da Bungalow.
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
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Furry

⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠉⠻⣷⣦⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣤⡶⠟⠋⢻⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢰⠇⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣧⣤⣄⣀⣤⣤⣾⡟⠉⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠘⡄⠀⢀⣠⣴⠟⠋⠉⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⠿⣷⣀⠀⠀⣸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢐⣦⡾⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠿⣾⡁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⢾⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⢀⣀⣰⣾⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⡇⡀⠀⠀⣀⣿⣻⡗⠀⠰⣛⣍⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⡇⠀⢰⢧⡻⢎⠿⠆⠼⣏⠻⣣⠀⠀⠈⢻⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⢡⠀⢠⣶⠖⠃⠐⠂⠀⠈⠉⢉⠀⢀⡄⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢀⡠⠒⠛⠻⣮⠈⣿⣦⡀⠰⡷⡇⠀⢀⣽⣂⣿⣇⣿⣇⠀⣀⡤⠤⢀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣞⠀⠀⠀⡀⣼⣿⣿⣿⠛⡳⠦⠖⠀⡘⣿⣿⠃⢻⣿⣿⠊⠁⠀⠀⠀⠈⢂ ⠀⢸⡟⢀⠀⢸⡇⣿⢿⣿⠟⠑⠑⢄⠀⠀⡾⠟⡏⠀⢸⠀⠃⠀⣰⡖⠀⠀⢀⢸ ⣰⠀⠃⢸⠆⢼⣷⠙⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠓⠎⠆⠀⠈⢲⣤⡄⠀⢰⡿⢃⣴⣶⣼⡏ ⣿⠀⠀⠈⠀⠈⠀⠀⡾⣅⣀⡀⢀⠀⠀⢸⡄⣠⡾⠛⠉⣿⣦⡿⠇⠀⠉⠉⠁⠀ ⣿⣄⠀⠀⢀⡷⠀⠸⡇⠀⠈⠉⠉⠉⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠙⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢿⣿⣿⣦⣼⡅⠀⠀⣷⣦⡀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣶⣶⣤⣀⣤⣾⠇⠀
July 2020

Tricky the Clown (Expurgation)

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⢻⠟⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⢿⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⠀⠀⠀⠜⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠠⠒⠒⠒⠄⠀⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠺⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠃⠀⠀⠀⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⣀⡴⠒⢺⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠩⠛⠒⠚⣲⠃⠂⠠⠐⠠⠐⡀⠈⡄⠀⠀⣀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢡⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠲⠠⢠⠀⠀⢀⠁⢀⠁⠈⠁⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⢶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⡐⠀⠀⠈⠑⠚⠄⡄⣄⣄⣶⣿⣿⠟⠛⠋⠉⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡆⠀⢀⠊⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢙⣻⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣧⠀⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠤⣀⠀⠉⠙⢢⡀⠀⣹ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠛⠓⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣷⠠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢣⡀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⢀⣶⣶⣦⠀⠀⠀⡇⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿ ⡿⠀⢀⡴⠺⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠢⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⠀⢸⣷⣾⠁⠀⠀⢀⣤⣶⣶⣿⣷⣄⡀⠀⢈⡇⢂⠀⠒⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠀⠀⠈⠉⢙⣇⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⣸⡇⠀⠈⠁⠂⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⡀⠀⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⣰⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣶⣦⣤⣤⣤⡴⠶⠒⣿⠛⢻⠉⠁⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⡉⠁⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠘⢀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣖⠀⠀⠀⠀⠒⣲⣿⠀⠀⠀⣀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
June 2021

Do you guys mind not spamming the chat so much?

twitchquotes: 𝔻𝕠 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕘𝕦𝕪𝕤 𝕞𝕚𝕟𝕕 𝕟𝕠𝕥 𝕤𝕡𝕒𝕞𝕞𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕔𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕤𝕠 𝕞𝕦𝕔𝕙? 𝕀'𝕞 𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕝𝕝𝕪 𝕥𝕣𝕪𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕥𝕠 𝕡𝕒𝕪 𝕒𝕥𝕥𝕖𝕟𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟 𝕥𝕠 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕤𝕥𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕞 𝕒𝕟𝕕 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕘𝕦𝕪𝕤 𝕒𝕣𝕖 𝕕𝕚𝕤𝕥𝕣𝕒𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕞𝕖. 𝕀𝕗 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕘𝕦𝕪𝕤 𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕝𝕝𝕪 𝕔𝕒𝕣𝕖𝕕 𝕒𝕓𝕠𝕦𝕥 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕢𝕦𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕪 𝕠𝕗 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕤𝕥𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕞 𝕠𝕣 𝕄𝕠𝕠𝕟 𝕙𝕚𝕞𝕤𝕖𝕝𝕗 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕨𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕 𝕤𝕥𝕠𝕡 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕤𝕡𝕒𝕞𝕞𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕒𝕟𝕕 𝕔𝕠𝕡𝕪𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕒𝕟𝕕 𝕡𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕘. 𝔾𝕠𝕕, 𝕀 𝕤𝕨𝕖𝕒𝕣 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕘𝕦𝕪𝕤 𝕒𝕣𝕖 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕨𝕠𝕣𝕤𝕥 𝕡𝕒𝕣𝕥 𝕠𝕗 𝕥𝕨𝕚𝕥𝕔𝕙. ℂ𝕠𝕦𝕝𝕕𝕟'𝕥 𝕪𝕠𝕦 𝕛𝕦𝕤𝕥 𝕥𝕣𝕪 𝕥𝕠 𝕓𝕖 𝕞𝕒𝕥𝕦𝕣𝕖 𝕗𝕠𝕣 𝕠𝕟𝕔𝕖 𝕚𝕟 𝕪𝕠𝕦𝕣 𝕝𝕚𝕗𝕖?
twitch chat
February 2018
MOONMOON

A man orders bat at his favorite restaurant

A man orders bat at his favorite restaurant. 3 years later, NFLX fucking tanks 20% after earnings.
January 2022

WallStreetBets

Smartest Man in Existence

twitchquotes: When I was in school I used to have an IQ of 15. My classmates used to harass me for not being that smart. But since 2013, my life has changed. My IQ is now 195 and it increases by 5 every time I sit down on Saturday nights to watch this one show. It is called Rick and Morty. Because of that, I get all the girls and people are always comparing me to Albert Einstein, some even say that I am the cure for cancer. When the government found out that I watch Rick and Morty, they showed up to my residence and took me to a secret facility to take an exam. The exam was about explaining all the jokes in Rick and Morty and I had to answer each question in all currently spoken languages. Since I watched Rick and Morty, I didn't have any problems and I completed it in 30 minutes. The next day, I got to see the results and I passed the exam with a score of 100%. They gave me the title "Smartest Man in Existence". Guess I am out of this world.
twitch chat
October 2017

Rick and Morty

Text-to-Speech Playing