[Copypasta] I went to see Cars in the theater yesterday

Ok, this is ABSOLUTE fucking bullshit. I went to see Cars in the theater yesterday, and when Lightning McQueen got HOT with Sally in Radiator Springs, my boner engaged. When Lightning McQueen said "Ka-Chow!", I couldn't help it!!! I closed my eyes, and I TORE my dick to shreds, using whip like motions and pulled with great force. That was one of the best nuts I ever had, just thinking about it now gets me riled up. Thing is, I nutted all over the kid sitting right next to me, and his mom got all pissed at me, screaming at me for jacking off on her son. I told that bitch to shut the fuck up, and that jacking off is a natural, artistic, and beautiful process. You should BE HAPPY that my semen is all over your son, maybe he can learn a lesson or two about the culture and art of jacking off. HOWEVER, the movie theater managers didn't agree with me. They KICKED ME OUT of the movie theater, and I didn't even finish watching the Cars movie. Not only THAT, but they made me clean up my semen after it already dried out and solidified on the seats. THATS TORTURE!! Do you know how hard it is to clean semen after its dried out? You CLEAN semen after its FRESH out of your cock, not an hour after you fucking nutted. This is a fucking OUTRAGE. Do you really expect me to not whip out my cock and jack off when i see a HOT sex scene in a movie? Either don't ban sex scenes in movies, or LET ME jack off in your theater, assholes.
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
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Kripp's new sub emotes have convinced me he is a sellout

twitchquotes: สœแด‡ส แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜, แด›สœษชs ษชs แด›สœแด‡ สŸแด€sแด› สแดแดœ'สŸสŸ ส™แด‡ ส€แด‡แด€แด…ษชษดษข า“ส€แดแด แดแด‡. แด›สœแด‡sแด‡ ษดแด‡แดก แด‡แดแดแด›แด‡s สœแด€แด แด‡ แด„แดษดแด ษชษดแด„แด‡แด… แดแด‡ แด›สœแด€แด› สแดแดœ'ส€แด‡ แดŠแดœsแด› แด€ษดแดแด›สœแด‡ส€ sแด‡สŸสŸโ”€แดแดœแด›. ษช แด›สœแดแดœษขสœแด› สแดแดœ แดกแด‡ส€แด‡ แด…ษชา“า“แด‡ส€แด‡ษดแด› แด›สœแด€ษด แด›สœแด‡ ส€แด‡sแด›. ษช แด›สœแดแดœษขสœแด› สแดแดœ sแด›ส€แด‡แด€แดแด‡แด… า“แดส€ สแดแดœส€ แด ษชแด‡แดกแด‡ส€s... ษช แด›สœแดแดœษขสœแด›, ษช แด›สœแดแดœษขสœแด› สแดแดœ sแด›ส€แด‡แด€แดแด‡แด… า“แดส€ แดแด‡. ส™แดœแด› แด›สœแด€แด›'s แดแด แด‡ส€, แด‹ส€ษชแด˜แด˜. ษขแดแดแด…ส™สแด‡
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

What Is This + Ratio

what is this + L + ratio + wrong + get a job + unfunny + you fell off + never liked you anyway + cope + ur allergic to gluten + don't care + cringe ur a kid + literally shut the fuck up + galileo did it better + your avi was made in MS Excel + ur bf is kinda ugly + i have more subscribers + owned + ur a toddler + reverse double take back + u sleep in a different bedroom from your wife + get rekt + i said it better + u smell + copy + who asked + dead game + seethe + ur a coward + stay mad + you main yuumi + aired + you drive a fiat 500 + the hood watches xqc now + yo mama + ok + currently listening to rizzle kicks without u. plus ur mind numbingly stupid plus ur voice is ronald mcdonald.
May 2022

Ratio

SPAM THIS PONG TO FREE HONG KONG

twitchquotes: SPAM ๐Ÿ“ THIS ๐Ÿ“ PONG ๐Ÿ“ TO ๐Ÿ“ FREE ๐Ÿ“ HONG ๐Ÿ“ KONG ๐Ÿ“
twitch chat
November 2019
OverwatchLeague

Rhyme Chant

Nazi doge

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–’โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–’โ– โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–Œ โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œ โ–€โ–’โ–€โ–โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–Œโ–„โ–‘โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’
ascii art
November 2014

Hey Reynad, King of Nigeria here

twitchquotes: Hey Reynad, King of Nigeria here. Through generations of inbreeding, my family tree now looks more like a family reef. The genetic defects are getting out of hand. My grandson was just born with a giant donger on his head. How will this affect my reign?
twitch chat
January 2015
Reynad
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