[Copypasta] I went to see Cars in the theater yesterday

Ok, this is ABSOLUTE fucking bullshit. I went to see Cars in the theater yesterday, and when Lightning McQueen got HOT with Sally in Radiator Springs, my boner engaged. When Lightning McQueen said "Ka-Chow!", I couldn't help it!!! I closed my eyes, and I TORE my dick to shreds, using whip like motions and pulled with great force. That was one of the best nuts I ever had, just thinking about it now gets me riled up. Thing is, I nutted all over the kid sitting right next to me, and his mom got all pissed at me, screaming at me for jacking off on her son. I told that bitch to shut the fuck up, and that jacking off is a natural, artistic, and beautiful process. You should BE HAPPY that my semen is all over your son, maybe he can learn a lesson or two about the culture and art of jacking off. HOWEVER, the movie theater managers didn't agree with me. They KICKED ME OUT of the movie theater, and I didn't even finish watching the Cars movie. Not only THAT, but they made me clean up my semen after it already dried out and solidified on the seats. THATS TORTURE!! Do you know how hard it is to clean semen after its dried out? You CLEAN semen after its FRESH out of your cock, not an hour after you fucking nutted. This is a fucking OUTRAGE. Do you really expect me to not whip out my cock and jack off when i see a HOT sex scene in a movie? Either don't ban sex scenes in movies, or LET ME jack off in your theater, assholes.
December 2020
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

Kripp and Trump

twitchquotes: Aʟʟ Kʀɪᴘᴘ ᴡᴀɴᴛᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ᴅᴏ ᴡᴀs ᴋᴇᴇᴘ ʜɪs ʜᴇᴛᴇʀᴏsᴇxᴜᴀʟ ʀᴇʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴsʜɪᴘ sᴇᴄʀᴇᴛ. Nᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴜʏs ᴇxᴘᴏsᴇᴅ ʜɪᴍ, ʜᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ Tʀᴜᴍᴘ ғᴇᴇʟs? I ʙᴇᴛ ʜᴇ's ᴘʀᴇᴛᴛʏ ᴅᴇᴠᴀsᴛᴀᴛᴇᴅ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʜᴇ ғᴏᴜɴᴅ ᴏᴜᴛ Kʀɪᴘᴘ ᴡᴇɴᴛ ʙᴇʜɪɴᴅ ʜɪs ʙᴀᴄᴋ ᴛʜɪs ᴡᴀʏ.Yᴏᴜ sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴀʟʟ ʙᴇ ᴀsʜᴀᴍᴇᴅ ᴏғ ʏᴏᴜʀsᴇʟᴠᴇs.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

BUT AT LEAST WE GOT FREEDOM

twitchquotes: CAN'T HANDLE A PANDEMIC 4Head CAN'T HANDLE PROTESTS 4Head CAN'T HANDLE OTHER REGIONS 4Head BUT AT LEAST WE GOT FREEDOM Pepega
twitch chat
July 2020

EU vs NA

Illuminati

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⢣⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠎⡴⢦⠱⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⢎⣜⣉⣉⣧⡱⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⢃⡞⠒⣒⣒⠒⢳⡘⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⢡⣎⡩⠭⠤⠤⠭⢍⣱⡜⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡴⢡⡯⠴⢒⣈⣩⣉⣑⡒⠠⣹⡌⢦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡔⣡⣣⠔⡺⡋⡁⢀⡀⢈⠙⢟⠢⣝⣄⢢⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡜⣰⡟⠁⢰⡓⢎⣀⣸⣿⣷⡱⢚⡆⠈⢻⣆⢣⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠎⡼⣇⠣⡀⠸⡄⢊⢿⣿⣿⡿⡑⢠⠇⢀⠜⣸⢧⠱⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⢋⢼⡙⢌⠳⣍⠲⢽⣄⣁⠂⠐⣈⣠⡯⠔⣡⠞⡡⢊⣧⡙⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⢃⣞⠣⡙⠦⡑⠦⣍⡒⠤⠬⠭⠭⠥⠤⢒⣩⠴⢊⠴⢋⠜⣳⡘⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣃⣛⣚⣓⣚⣓⣚⣓⣒⣛⣛⣓⣒⣒⣚⣛⣛⣒⣚⣓⣚⣓⣚⣒⣛⣘⣆⠀⠀
February 2021

F2P player

twitchquotes: Hi Trump, nice warrior deck! I'm a F2P player though, and was wondering if you could tell me what cards i could use in place of Baron, Alexstrasza, Ragnaros, Brawl, Death's bite, and shield slam?
twitch chat
November 2014
Trump

the longest ratio

don’t care + didn’t ask + cry about it + who asked + stay mad + get real + L + bleed + mald seethe cope harder + dilate + incorrect + hoes mad + pound sand + basic skill issue + typo + ratio + ur dad left + you fell off + no u + the audacity + triggered + repelled + ur a minor + k. + any askers + get a life + ok and? + cringe + copium + go outside + touch grass + kick rocks + quote tweet + think again + not based + not funny didn’t laugh + social credits -999, 999, 999, 999 + get good + reported + ad hominem + ok boomer + small pp + ur allergic to sunlight + GG! + get rekt + trolled + your loss + muted + banned + kicked + permaban + useless + i slept with ur mom + yo momma + yo momma so fat + redpilled + no bitches allowed + i said it better + tiktok fan + get a life + unsubscribed + plundered + go tell reddit + donowalled + simp + get sticked bug LOL + talk nonsense + trump supporter + your’re a full time discord mod + you’re* + grammar issue + nerd + get clapped + kys + lorem ipsum dolor sit amet + go outside + bleach + lol + gay + retard + autistic + reported + ask deez + ez clap + straight cash + idgaf + ratio again + stay mad + read FAQ + youre lost + you “re” + stay pressed + reverse double take back + pedophile + cancelled + done for + don't give a damn + get a job + sus + baka + sussy baka + get blocked + mad free + freer than air + furry + rip bozo + you're a (insert stereotype) + slight_smile + aired + cringe again + Super Idol的笑容 + mad cuz bad + my pronouns are xe, xem & xyr + irrelevant + deal with it + screencapped your bio + karen/kyle + jealous + you're deaf + balls + i'll be right back + go ahead whine about it + 日本語がお上手ですね + get fucked + you can’t understand what the word intelligence means with your dumb ass + you have hair + queued + put some thought into what you're going to do with that + stfu + go to bed + yes, i'm taller than you + i think your joke is funny + i rejected your mother's advances + marooned + you can’t read + I win + final ratio+ backup ratio + yb better + you take fucking redpills and say that its and to "socialize" + you have no social credit + BING CHILLING + super idol 105 C is the best musical performance in the whole history of mankind + Adolf Hitler (German: [ˈadɔlf ˈhɪtlɐ] (About this soundlisten); 20 April 1889 – 30 April 1945) was an Austrian-born German politician who was the dictator of Germany from 1933 until his death in 1945. He rose to power as the leader of the Nazi Party,[a] becoming the chancellor in 1933 and then assuming the title of Führer und Reichskanzler in 1934.[b] During his dictatorship, he initiated World War II in Europe by invading Poland on 1 September 1939. He was closely involved in military operations throughout the war and was central to the perpetration of the Holocaust, the genocide of about six million Jews and millions of other victims + don't care + didn't ask + you're white + cry about it + stay mad + get real + L + repeat + mald seethe cope harder + hoes mad + basic + skill issue + ratio + you fell off + the audacity + triggered + any askers + redpilled + get a life + ok and? + cringe + touch grass + donowalled + not based + your're a (insert stereotype) + not funny didn't laugh + you're* + grammar issue + go outside + get good + reported + ad hominem + GG! + ask deez + ez clap + straight cash + ratio again + final ratio + stay mad + stay pressed + pedophile + cancelled + done for + mad free + freer than air + rip bozo + slight_smile + cringe again + mad cuz bad + lol + irrelevant + cope + jealous + go ahead whine about it + your problem + don't care even more + sex offender + not okay + glhf + problematic + GOOF the famous rapper has gone diamond on his album "ON DA SKATEBOARD" + can i get a Chick-fil-a Chicken Sandwich and a Spicy Chicken Sandwich + FAMOUS RAPPER GOOF JUST GROOMED A CHILD IN REAL LIFE HE WAS ACTUALLY THE ZAMN GUY ALL ALONG + black person + white person + mexican person + squid game person + left wing + right wing + chicken wing+ you fell off + ratio + you're white + you're british + who asked + no u + deez nuts + radio + don't care + didn't ask + i'm a minor + i'm neurodivergent + caught in 4k + cope + seethe + GG + in 1947 the world's first general purpose computer, the 30 ton ENIAC was created + your mom's + the hood watches markiplier now + grow up + L + L (part 2) + retweet + ligma + taco bell tortilla crunch + think outside the bun + ur benched + ur a wrench + i own you + ur dad fell off + my dad could beat ur dad up + ur aimhacking + silver elite + tryhard + boomer + sksksksk + ur beta + i'm sigma + ur submissive + L (part 3) + yb better + ur sus + this is a cry for help and i'm extremely depressed. + quote tweet + you're cringe + i did your mom + you bought monkey nft + you're weirdchamp + you're a clown + my father left me at the age of 4 and i never recovered since + my dad owns steam + who want me? + i'm lonely + they didn't think it could possibly happen, but they're releasing L
May 2022

Who Asked?

Ratio

Text-to-Speech Playing