[Copypasta] mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition

I'm convinced that mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition of grand opening and going out of business sale. It is both and neither at once until an observer records the state at which point it becomes one or the other. But because you know exactly where the store is located, you cannot know how fast it is going out of business because of your uncertainty about its business momentum. All around us, all the time pairs of anti-discount mattress stores and discount mattress stores are popping into existence, forming the quantum memory foam that is the basis for the universe. Without the pressure of this quantum memory foam strip malls would collapse. We can see evidence of this when a pair is created such that one half is within the sales radius of a supermassive furniture store like Ikea-- one of them is pulled in and the other escapes as a Hawking mattress store.
December 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

I have evidence. No u

purple: IT'S RED! I HAVE EVIDENCE! red: Purple sus ngl. purple: no u red: ... ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤred was not an impostor.
February 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Qtpie wears a blue shirt

twitchquotes: QT, after a long time of watching your mediocre gameplay, and biting cats tails. We have always seen you in your white shirt, the only other time being black tshirt to your wedding. Why is your shirt blue? Are you trying to tell us something? Do you need help? Is this a cry of attention? We need to know QT ... Sincerely, a concerned chatter.
twitch chat
May 2019
imaqtpie

Stick figure sex

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June 2021

NSFW

I remember a time when copypasta was biting satire

twitchquotes: I remember a time when copypasta was biting satire and prophetic indictments of contemporary Twitch chat. Copypasta when I was a younger teenager had the potency to topple Nazi moderatorships and revolutionize new chat epochs. Even the truncation of "copypasta" to "pasta" shows a lack of eloquence that speaks volumes. If, like me, you are a product of those better times and wish to see them return then speak out. Let the memers and Toucans know that real copypasta back.
twitch chat
July 2015

MODS

Classic

NA HAS MCDONALDS EMPIRE

twitchquotes: EU HAS ROMAN EMPIRE LUL IND HAS CHINESE EMPIRE LUL AFR HAS MAMLUKS EMPIRE LUL NA HAS MCDONALDS EMPIRE LUL
twitch chat
July 2019

EU vs NA

Text-to-Speech Playing