[Copypasta] mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition

I'm convinced that mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition of grand opening and going out of business sale. It is both and neither at once until an observer records the state at which point it becomes one or the other. But because you know exactly where the store is located, you cannot know how fast it is going out of business because of your uncertainty about its business momentum. All around us, all the time pairs of anti-discount mattress stores and discount mattress stores are popping into existence, forming the quantum memory foam that is the basis for the universe. Without the pressure of this quantum memory foam strip malls would collapse. We can see evidence of this when a pair is created such that one half is within the sales radius of a supermassive furniture store like Ikea-- one of them is pulled in and the other escapes as a Hawking mattress store.
December 2020
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SUS

โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ› โฌ›โฌ›๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›โฌ›๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›โฌ› โฌ›โฌ›๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›โฌ›๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ› โฌ›โฌ›๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›โฌ›๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›โฌ› โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›โฌ›๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›โฌ› โฌ›โฌ›๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›โฌ›๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›โฌ›๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ด๐Ÿ”ดโฌ›โฌ› โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›โฌ›
August 2021

Among Us / Amogus

spamming copypastas is the worst form of comedy

twitchquotes: Honestly, spamming copypastas is the worst form of comedy to exist on this planet. Instead of original jokes, we just have repetitive trash. As a stand up comedian, I spend hours on my craft making sure I make original jokes. I always leave the comedy club with the hottest bros. Maybe you copypasta people can learn something from me.
twitch chat
October 2020

Hello Kripp, this is Juan Jose Manuel Torres Esteban Rodriguez Ochoa Martinez Lopez Jr

twitchquotes: ะฝello ฤธrฮนpp, jฯ…an joั•รฉ ะผanฯ…el ั‚orreั• eั•ั‚eะฒan rodrฮนgฯ…ez ocะฝoa ะผarั‚ฮนnez lopez jr. ะฝere. ฮน no lฮนฤธe yoฯ…r cะฝaั‚. pleaั•e า“rฮนendั•, no ะผore ั•paะผะผerฮนno ฮนn cะฝaั‚erฮนno oฤธ aะผฮนgo? or elั•e ฮน ะฝop ะฒorderฮนno. no cappฯ…ccฮนno.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

This Disney DVD is enhanced with Disney's FastPlay

twitchquotes: ๐™๐™๐™ž๐™จ ๐˜ฟ๐™ž๐™จ๐™ฃ๐™š๐™ฎ ๐˜ฟ๐™‘๐˜ฟ ๐™ž๐™จ ๐™š๐™ฃ๐™๐™–๐™ฃ๐™˜๐™š๐™™ ๐™ฌ๐™ž๐™ฉ๐™ ๐˜ฟ๐™ž๐™จ๐™ฃ๐™š๐™ฎโ€™๐™จ ๐™๐™–๐™จ๐™ฉ๐™‹๐™ก๐™–๐™ฎ. ๐™”๐™ค๐™ช๐™ง ๐™ข๐™ค๐™ซ๐™ž๐™š ๐™–๐™ฃ๐™™ ๐™– ๐™จ๐™š๐™ก๐™š๐™˜๐™ฉ๐™ž๐™ค๐™ฃ ๐™ค๐™› ๐™—๐™ค๐™ฃ๐™ช๐™จ ๐™›๐™š๐™–๐™ฉ๐™ช๐™ง๐™š๐™จ ๐™ฌ๐™ž๐™ก๐™ก ๐™—๐™š๐™œ๐™ž๐™ฃ ๐™–๐™ช๐™ฉ๐™ค๐™ข๐™–๐™ฉ๐™ž๐™˜๐™–๐™ก๐™ก๐™ฎ. ๐™๐™ค ๐™—๐™ฎ๐™ฅ๐™–๐™จ๐™จ ๐™๐™–๐™จ๐™ฉ ๐™‹๐™ก๐™–๐™ฎ, ๐™จ๐™š๐™ก๐™š๐™˜๐™ฉ ๐™ฉ๐™๐™š ๐™ˆ๐™–๐™ž๐™ฃ ๐™ˆ๐™š๐™ฃ๐™ช ๐™—๐™ช๐™ฉ๐™ฉ๐™ค๐™ฃ ๐™–๐™ฉ ๐™–๐™ฃ๐™ฎ ๐™ฉ๐™ž๐™ข๐™š. ๐™๐™–๐™จ๐™ฉ ๐™‹๐™ก๐™–๐™ฎ ๐™ฌ๐™ž๐™ก๐™ก ๐™—๐™š๐™œ๐™ž๐™ฃ ๐™ž๐™ฃ ๐™– ๐™ข๐™ค๐™ข๐™š๐™ฃ๐™ฉโ€ฆ
twitch chat
May 2019

Holding Galactic Virgins

Virgin Galactic Holdings changes name to Holding Galactic Virgins, and announces itโ€™s changing its business model to extraterrestrial prostitution. Edit: SpaceX, not to be outdone, changes to SpaceSex
December 2020

WallStreetBets

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