[Copypasta] mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition

I'm convinced that mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition of grand opening and going out of business sale. It is both and neither at once until an observer records the state at which point it becomes one or the other. But because you know exactly where the store is located, you cannot know how fast it is going out of business because of your uncertainty about its business momentum. All around us, all the time pairs of anti-discount mattress stores and discount mattress stores are popping into existence, forming the quantum memory foam that is the basis for the universe. Without the pressure of this quantum memory foam strip malls would collapse. We can see evidence of this when a pair is created such that one half is within the sales radius of a supermassive furniture store like Ikea-- one of them is pulled in and the other escapes as a Hawking mattress store.
December 2020
What happened to this ad? :(
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Fabulous

βŠ‚_ヽ γ€€ οΌΌοΌΌ οΌΏ γ€€γ€€ οΌΌ(γ€€β€’_β€’) F γ€€γ€€γ€€ <γ€€βŒ’γƒ½ A γ€€γ€€γ€€/ γ€€ へ\ B γ€€γ€€ /γ€€γ€€/γ€€οΌΌοΌΌ U γ€€γ€€ οΎšγ€€γƒŽγ€€γ€€ ヽ_぀ L γ€€γ€€/γ€€/ O γ€€ /γ€€/| U γ€€(γ€€(ヽ S γ€€|γ€€|、\ γ€€| δΈΏ οΌΌ βŒ’) γ€€| |γ€€γ€€) / `γƒŽ )γ€€γ€€LοΎ‰ (_/
December 2020

I miss Julio the donkey

twitchquotes: Hello, my name its Juan Pastas Copyrino. Sorry my england. Last week donkey Julio died outside of the house. I loved Julio. Every day we ride to work together. I also spoke donkey language better than my england. Julio and me always talked for hours about business and the political situation here. But now Julio is in donkey heaven. I miss him
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

Gr8 b8 m8

twitchquotes: Gr8 b8, m8. I rel8, str8 appreci8, and congratul8. I r8 this b8 an 8/8. Plz no h8, I'm str8 ir8. Cre8 more, can't w8. We should convers8, I won't ber8, my number is 8888888, ask for N8. No calls l8 or out of st8. If on a d8, ask K8 to loc8. Even with a full pl8, I always have time to communic8 so don't hesit8, I hope you r8 8/8 .. m8.
twitch chat
October 2014

Classic

LULW pointing at WeirdChamp

twitchquotes: LULW LULW πŸ‘‡ β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € LULW πŸ‘‰ WeirdChamp πŸ‘ˆ LULW β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € β € πŸ‘† LULW LULW
twitch chat
September 2019

Don't get salt Reynad!

twitchquotes: (β—•β€Ώβ—•βœΏ) Don't get salty Reynad! Ur doing great! (β—•β€Ώβ—•βœΏ)
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

salty

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