[Copypasta] That hunk of a man is an E-sports athlete?

twitchquotes: That hunk of a man, [insert Cyber sportsman here], is an E-sports athlete? Unbelievable. Kreygasm He could be a Calvin Klein model. Kreygasm Or a pro footballer with a ripped physique like that. Kreygasm That is by far the hottest Cyber sportsman to ever grace the esports industry. Kreygasm
twitch chat
October 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Jared and Jock E-Athelete bullies

twitchquotes: Jared shuffles to his locker wiping a tear from his eye. He looks over his shoulder to see DOM and QT, the jock E-Athlete bullies, laughing at him and his wedgie. Jared clinches his fist in rage knowing that soon the time would come, he will show them...
twitch chat
May 2016
imaqtpie

Boosted Animal Jared

League of Legends

I want to fuck the Samsung girl

Oh my fucking god I want to fuck the Samsung Virtual assistant so fucking bad, every waking second of my fucking life since the release of that fucking ad I’ve done nothing but think about her. I can’t go for more that 2 seconds without getting an erection the size of the Burj Khalifa and ejaculating at Mach 12. I’ve ejaculated so many times to simply the thought of her existence that my cock is no longer cumming sperm but literal fucking blood. I can’t stoping thinking about her even after passing out from the pain of cumming blood. I can’t complete nearly any daily tasks because my mind is continuously invaded by her perfection, I can’t live every day of my life thinking about angelic voice screaming in luscious pain about the new Samsung data plan while I fuck her perfect 3D modeled asshole. My personal hell will only get worse in a matter of hours as I will scavenge every corner of the internet in search of her rule 34 and my continuous stream of blood cum will only get worse as I’ll spend days, weeks, possibly months jacking off to her non-stop for any reason other than to shit, piss and eat. Simply at this point alone in writing this I’ve lost 2-3 liters of blood alone with just the simple thought of her existence. If this is how I die then I wouldn’t want it any other way.
June 2021

You are such a large pepperoni, why aren't you a pizza

twitchquotes: "Kripp my son," say the Papparin, "you are such a large pepperoni, why aren't you a pizza." But the Kripp don't respond. He elopes to Greece and runs his hand through his unshaven face scruff and say "Well met!" to the twisted Succubus. Alone in his heart, Papparin commits sudoku at a Starbucks in San Bernardino with Al Pacino, no cappucino.
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

I hope you enjoy being tucked

twitchquotes: The year was 1999. A much younger trump was getting ready for bed when his mother entered the room. "Sweetums, it's much past your bedtime!" she chides. Obediently, Trump climbs into bed. As his mother lovingly lays the covers over him, she whispers "I hope you enjoy being tucked."
twitch chat
February 2015
Trump

Donald of the House Trump

twitchquotes: SMOrc In the name of Donald of the House Trump SMOrc , First of his name, rightful President of the States. Lord of the 2 political parties, SMOrc Protector of the Border. I trumpW sentence you to exile. SMOrc
twitch chat
August 2015
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