[Copypasta] That hunk of a man is an E-sports athlete?

twitchquotes: That hunk of a man, [insert Cyber sportsman here], is an E-sports athlete? Unbelievable. Kreygasm He could be a Calvin Klein model. Kreygasm Or a pro footballer with a ripped physique like that. Kreygasm That is by far the hottest Cyber sportsman to ever grace the esports industry. Kreygasm
twitch chat
October 2020
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Trump gave Katie Kripp's MITHRIL ARMOR

twitchquotes: Hello "Kripp" ...or should I say COCKTAVIAN. Guess who? YEAH. It's KATIE. From HIGH SCHOOL. Ever since you left me to play this stupid game, me and Trump have decided to continue playing Runescape WITHOUT YOU. And guess what? He gave me your MITHRIL ARMOR. Have fun playing this stupid card game, JERK!.
twitch chat
August 2014
Kripp

Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)

I have lost everything, and I'm not sure how to continue. This summer I invested $17,500 (six months salary and my entire life savings) into ornamental gourd futures, hoping to capitalize on this lucrative emerging industry. After watching a video about Vincent Kosuga and his monopoly on onions, I decided I'd try to do something similar with another vegetable. I did some research and found out many agricultural forecasters expected this year's gourd yield would be far smaller than the past, due to deteriorating soil conditions in central Mexico and a warmer-than-average spring. At first, demand soared around Halloween and prices skyrocketed, but the gourd bubble burst on November 12th. Unfortunately, the coronavirus caused a massive drop-off in demand due to fewer families decorating their tables for thanksgiving, and prices plummeted. I had invested early enough that I thought I would still be fine, but then on the morning of December 2nd, a new email in my inbox caused my stomach to turn into a pretzel. The massive gourd shipment from Argentina, scheduled for early March, had arrived. I was planning on selling off my futures right before this, in February, but this ruined everything. To top it off, the gourds in this shipment were absolutely gargantuan, some topping 4 pounds each, causing the price-per-pound to drop like an anchor into the range of 6 cents per pound. I am ruined.
January 2021

Classic

WallStreetBets

I think i need a special vaccine

twitchquotes: ๐Ÿ˜ณ what's this? my heart is beating so fast ๐Ÿ’“ I feel dizzy ๐Ÿคช what is this tension in my lower body? ๐Ÿค” I am sweating so much ๐Ÿฅต I think i need a special vaccine ๐Ÿ† because I have [insert streamer name]virus ๐Ÿค’๐Ÿค’๐Ÿค’
twitch chat
April 2021

We have you surrounded weeb

twitchquotes: NaM NaM โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € NaM AYAYA NaM โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € NaM NaM โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ € โ €โ € โ € WE HAVE YOU SURROUNDED, YOU FILTHY WEEB.
twitch chat
July 2019

๐Ÿ“ž 4Head HEY DALLAS

twitchquotes: ๐Ÿ“ž 4Head HEY DALLAS ๐Ÿ“ž 4Head JUST HIT BRONZE ๐Ÿ“ž 4Head CAN I JOIN?
twitch chat
March 2018
OverwatchLeague

Overwatch

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