[Copypasta] I can no longer resist the pizza

twitchquotes: I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the bathroom, I exit through the front door....
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(
More Kripp Copypastas

Octavian Morosan

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆ β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’ β–’β–’β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–‘β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–“β–“β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–“β–’ β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–€β–€β–“β–“β–“β–“β–€β–€β–“β–“β–“β–“β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘ β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–‘β–’ β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’
March 2015
Kripp

I just spotted an inconsistency

twitchquotes: Wait a minute. I just spotted an inconsistency. Could this be the work of the CIA? Look closely... below the stream. "10,000 viewers". What the heck? There's only 7 million people in the world, how could there possibly be 10 million viewers right now?
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Teddy Roosevelt messages Kripp

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, This is Teddy Roosevelt calling! I am concerned that you have formed a monopoly on the hearthstone section of twitch dot telly. You must renounce this darkness immediately or I will SMITE YOU like I did Andre Carnegie and Nelson Rockemsockem. You must give up your monopolistic ways or face the mighty wrath of the White House and the US Judicial system. Much love to Rania and the baby. Regards, yo boi TD
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

I pay $4.99 a month to enjoy chat

twitchquotes: ᢫ᢦ˒ᡗᡉᢰ α΅˜α΅– α΅α΅’α΅—Κ°α΅‰Κ³αΆ α΅˜αΆœα΅α΅‰Κ³Λ’ ΚΈα΅’α΅˜ ᡃʳᡉ ᡃ᢫᢫ α΅ƒαΆœα΅—αΆ¦αΆ°α΅ ʷᡃʸ α΅’α΅˜α΅— α΅’αΆ  Κ°α΅ƒαΆ°α΅ˆ α΅ƒαΆ°α΅ˆ αΆ°α΅’α΅— α΅ƒαΆœα΅—αΆ¦αΆ°α΅ αΆ¦αΆ° α΅ƒαΆœαΆœα΅’Κ³α΅ˆ Κ·αΆ¦α΅—Κ° α΅—Κ·αΆ¦α΅—αΆœΚ° α΅–α΅’αΆ«αΆ¦αΆœαΆ¦α΅‰Λ’ Κ·αΆ¦α΅—Κ° ᡃ᢫᢫ α΅—Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ ˒ᡖᡃᡐᡐᢦᢰᡍ α΅ƒαΆ°α΅ˆ ΚΈα΅’α΅˜ ᡃʳᡉ ᡃ᢫˒ᡒ ʳᡘᢦᢰᢦᢰᡍ α΅—Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ αΆœΚ°α΅ƒα΅— ʷʰᢦᢜʰ α΄΅ ᡖᡃʸ $4β‹…99 ᡃ ᡐᡒᢰᡗʰ α΅—α΅’ ᡉᢰʲᡒʸ α΅ƒαΆ°α΅ˆ α΄΅ ˒ʷᡉᡃʳ α΅—α΅’ α΅α΅’α΅ˆ αΆ¦αΆ  α΄΅ ˒ᡉᡉ ᡃᢰʸᡒᢰᡉ αΆœα΅’α΅–ΚΈ α΅ƒαΆ°α΅ˆ ᡖᡃ˒ᡗᡉ α΅—Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ α΄΅'ᡐ αΆœα΅ƒαΆ«αΆ«αΆ¦αΆ°α΅ ᡗʰᡉ αΆœα΅’α΅–Λ’
twitch chat
May 2014
Kripp

It's NOT Sudoku or Subaru. It's Seppuku or Harakiri.

twitchquotes: I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Nihongo (Japanese for you gaijin), and I’ve been involved in numerous study abroad trips to Japan, and I have memorized over 300 kanji characters. You need to learn that the correct term for ritual suicide is Seppuku or Harakiri. It's NOT Sudoku or Subaru. Please educate yourselves.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing