[Copypasta] JPOW was casually eating dinner

twitchquotes: JPOW was casually eating dinner with his wife and kids for Mother’s Day.. opened his investing.com app.. saw futures were red.. stopped mid dinner and folded his napkin.. headed to the basement.. fired up his money printers.. all why murming I’ll get these bears.. his wife yelled down and asked if he wanted dessert.. he didn’t even answer (and he loves dessert)
twitch chat
May 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Flame imp is a bad card

twitchquotes: Wow. Wanna know how I know that this guy doesn't know what he is doing? He plays Flame Imp, a card that does 3 damage to the guy that plays it. Clearly he doesn't understand that if you run out of health you lose.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hello Chat! I like attention

twitchquotes: Hello Chat! My name is Attention Whore. I only speak in large paragraphs or spam in short messages all in caps. I will consistently spam profanity almost in an attempt to find the boundaries of what is a bannable offense. Please yell at me and give me all your attention. Thank you for understanding and don't copy and paste this :) :)
twitch chat
May 2020

happE

⡿⡿⠟⠓⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣷⣶⣾⣿⣷⣶⣤⣬⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣟⣱⡿⠿⠿⠿⣮⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⢿⣿⡿⢁⢀⣀⣀⣀⣬⣉⣙⠋⠛⠿⢿⣿ ⣟⣛⣡⣤⣤⣁⣀⣄⣉⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⡿⠻⠛⠭⠿⡿⠯⣭⣟⡻⢿⣶⣦⣀⢙ ⣿⣿⣿⣯⣝⣛⣛⣛⣭⣾⣿⣿⣿⢇⣨⢶⣿⣶⡾⢶⣶⡶⢤⣤⣤⣀⠟⢉⣛⣓ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣿⠿⠻⠿⢿⣿⣷⣶⣮⣭⣭⣭⣴⣾⡻⣮⣵ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢋⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢿⡿⠿⠿⣆⣉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣽⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠟⢁⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⢋⣀⣒⣀⣐⣫⡍⠛⠿⠪⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⢏⠀⣿⣏⣠⣽⣍⣍⣡⣾⣿⣿⣟⣋⣋⣓⣓⣼⣥⣤⡈⠻⣿⣿⣿⡏⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡌⢦⢻⣮⡁⣼⣿⢭⣭⣉⣭⣭⣭⣉⣭⢛⡉⣛⢛⡛⠛⣠⡌⣿⣿⣧⣿⣿ ⣙⢿⣿⡜⣿⣿⣷⡹⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠟⠿⠛⠿⠻⠿⠿⠿⢃⣴⣿⢣⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡜⣿⣿⡗⠦⣀⣀⢀⠐⠒⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⣠⣾⣿⢏⣾⢏⢽⣻⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠈⠙⣾⣏⢧⣼⣿⣟⣛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣼⡋⠿⣾⣿⣿⣾ ⢿⣿⣿⠐⠄⠺⣿⣾⢟⣻⣿⣿⣛⡿⠿⢿⣾⣟⣭⡾⣿⣿⣿⡟⣿⣾⡻⣿⠿⠛ ⠀⡹⣿⡆⠈⣠⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣬⡛⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⢖⠝⠁⡳⣾⣾
July 2022
Forsen

Emote

Own a musket for home defense

twitchquotes: Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
twitch chat
August 2019

Idk what it is with you guys but you keep upvoting anything with the word cum sex or dick in it

Idk what it is with you guys but you keep upvoting anything with the word cum sex or dick in it. I came here for subtle wall of texts where you couldn’t tell if it was real or fake. Now these 10k upvoted cumshit copypastas are just upvoted, never pasted. You don’t actually see any of them in the wild it’s a truly sad state. See for yourself sort by top this year and it’s all sex like fr is it that funny?
September 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing