widepeepoHappy NA THIS widepeepoHappy EU THAT widepeepoHappy IM JUST WIDIN widepeepoHappy IN TWITCH CHAT widepeepoHappy
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My wife told me to talk dirty to her
So the wife and I were getting into it and she told me to talk dirty to her. So I called her a filthy slut.
She said โdirtier!โ So I smacked her around and told her I was going to use her like the cheap whore she is.
She said โdirtier!โ So I said โIโm gonna stick some SQQQ in your portfolio. Iโm gonna put it in long and deep. Iโm gonna fill you up with way OTM SPY puts.โ
She then slapped me, packed a bag and took the kids. I think weโre getting a divorce.
So the wife and I were getting into it and she told me to talk dirty to her. So I called her a filthy slut.
She said โdirtier!โ So I smacked her around and told her I was going to use her like the cheap whore she is.
She said โdirtier!โ So I said โIโm gonna stick some SQQQ in your portfolio. Iโm gonna put it in long and deep. Iโm gonna fill you up with way OTM SPY puts.โ
She then slapped me, packed a bag and took the kids. I think weโre getting a divorce.
Your precious Hearthstone would not EXIST
twitchquotes:Listen up you fucking assholes, your precious Hearthstone would not EXIST if it weren't for MTG, the fucking king of card games. It was the first and the best. Literally everything you love would not be here if Richard Garfield didn't create MTG in 1993. Pokemon, Yugioh, Hearthstone ALL WOULD NOT EXIST. So THINK TWICE next time you call this is a Hearthstone copy...
Listen up you fucking assholes, your precious Hearthstone would not EXIST if it weren't for MTG, the fucking king of card games. It was the first and the best. Literally everything you love would not be here if Richard Garfield didn't create MTG in 1993. Pokemon, Yugioh, Hearthstone ALL WOULD NOT EXIST. So THINK TWICE next time you call this is a Hearthstone copy...
Own a musket for home defense
twitchquotes:Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.
It's COCKtober ๐๐ u know what that means ๐๐ Dick sucking awareness month ๐ฏ๐๐ผ๐ send this to 12 of ur closet hoes ๐ญ๐ that love that dick ๐๐๐๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ฆ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ ๐ THOT-O-WEEN ๐is upon us !! If you get this message โ๏ธ you are queen ๐ธof the thots!!! Forward this to 7โฃ of the ๐ThOtTiEsT๐ thots ๐that you know will get some ๐๐ soon !!! If you don't, be prepared ๐for 6โฃ9โฃ days of bad luck โ ๏ธ ๐ โผ๏ธATTENTION โผ๏ธ๐๐ปALL HALLOWEEN ๐๐ธHOES ๐๐ ITS TIME TO GET SPOOKY โ ๏ธYOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS๐GET ๐FISTED๐ BY A ๐SKELETON ๐SHOVE โ๐ญCANDY ๐ฝ๐ฝCORN๐ฌIN YOUR ๐PUSSY ๐ฝAND ๐ DONT ๐ โโ๏ธFORGET ๐ฉ๐TO SUCK SOME ๐DRACULA ๐DICK ๐๐ฆ SO PUT ๐ YOUR ๐๐ COSTUMES AND GO ๐ชDOOR TO DOOR๐ช๐๐ ๐ฆBEGGING FOR THAT ๐GOOD GOOD๐ SEND THIS TO TWELVE1๏ธโฃ2๏ธโฃโ ๏ธSPOOKY ๐ป๐SLUTS๐ฎ TO ๐SHOW ๐๐ผTHAT YOURE READY TO GET SOME ๐ซCHOCOLATE๐ซ COVERED๐DICK๐ฝ BOO!! Sorry did I scare you?! WASSUP GURL๐๐๐ ITS COCKTOBER ๐๐๐๐๐ AND IF YOU๐๐ฝ ARE GETTING THIS๐๐ฝ๐ IT MEANS UR A HALLOWEEN ๐ป๐๐ป๐ป๐ ๐ป๐๐ป HOE๐๐ฉ๐ฉ๐ ๐ฆ๐ฆ every year in Cocktober the jack o slut๐๐๐ comes to life๐๐ป๐ป๐๐ฝ๐๐๐๐ฝ coming to harvest ๐๐๐ his hoes for THOT-O-WEEN๐๐๐ฅ๐ฅ๐๐๐ send this to 15 other Halloween Hoes or else you a TRICK๐๐ป๐ป ๐ IF YOU GET 5 BACK UR A THOT-O-WEEN TREAT๐๐ IF YOU GET 10 BACK UR A SLUTTY WITCH BITCH๐๐โจ๐ฎ BUT IF YOU GET 15 BACK UR THE SPOOKIES
I sexually Identify as the "I sexually identify as an attack helicopter" joke
I sexually Identify as the "I sexually identify as an attack helicopter" joke. Ever since I was a child, I've dreamed of flippantly dismissing any concepts or discussions regarding gender that don't fit in with what I learned in 8th grade bio. People say to me that this joke hasn't been funny since 2014 and please at least come up with a new one, but I don't care, I'm hilarious. I'm having a plastic surgeon install Ctrl, C, and V keys on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "epic kek dank meme trannies owned with facts and logic" and respect my right to shit up social media. If you can't accept me you're a memeophobe and need to check your ability-to-critically-think privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
I sexually Identify as the "I sexually identify as an attack helicopter" joke. Ever since I was a child, I've dreamed of flippantly dismissing any concepts or discussions regarding gender that don't fit in with what I learned in 8th grade bio. People say to me that this joke hasn't been funny since 2014 and please at least come up with a new one, but I don't care, I'm hilarious. I'm having a plastic surgeon install Ctrl, C, and V keys on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "epic kek dank meme trannies owned with facts and logic" and respect my right to shit up social media. If you can't accept me you're a memeophobe and need to check your ability-to-critically-think privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.