[Copypasta] i have not been gifted a single sub

twitchquotes: Hey streamer, i just wanted to express my disappointment in your community with this message. I have been a active viewer for the past couple of years and despite my constant effort i have not been gifted a single sub by your community. You should really be ashamed.
twitch chat
February 2020
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I think my boss might be a communist

I think my boss might be a communist. So a while ago, I got my first paycheck at my new job at a fast food place. I guess it wasn't too bad, but I did the math and figured out that I sold a lot more food per hour than I got paid for, even when you account for the price of the food. When I tried to talk to him about it, he said we're all part of one big team, but some people get paid more than others. This is suspiciously close to the famous "some are more equal than others" from my favorite book, Animal Farm and is what really got me thinking about this. We make the money, and then he takes it and gives it to someone who doesn't even work! I'm not economist, but this is textbook socialism. I think I've come to the conclusion that the best way for me to combat these socialist business practices would be teaming up with my fellow workers unify our power and demonstrate that we understand the full value of our labor. Anyone else have similar experiences with obviously Marxist bosses before, or any other advice?
May 2021

I know Pikachu dittos are pretty wild looking

twitchquotes: I know Pikachu dittos are pretty wild looking, but I'm hoping viewers watch w/ an open mind. Beneath what looks like Quick Attack spam is actually a lot of depth in the MU. Knowing when to press the B button is important. Pika dealing with his own height is intriguing too.
twitch chat
March 2019

Super Smash Bros

When batman beats mentally ill clowns

twitchquotes: How come when batman dons a suit of armor and beats up mentally ill clowns its "Heroic" but when I do it I'm "Committing manslaughter" and I'm "Not allowed in McDonalds again"
twitch chat
November 2019

My family keeps making Amongus references

It seems like the more I (13 M) play Amongus, the more my family tries to embaras me. The other day, I overheard my dad (49 M) say that he needed to "complete tasks" while working at home😯🀬 don't worry it gets worse. Then I hear my Mom (42 F) say that the amount of time I spend on my computer is "suspiscios." Ummm ok so (#1) ur too good to say "sus" πŸ€” and (#2) u dont even play amogus??? πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚. Even my moms work friend (28 M or somthing idk) came over yesterday to "look at her vents" I'm not even making this up πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„ But then the worse partπŸ˜‘ every sunday my granpa (69 M) comes over. He reminisces about his "Crewmates" from his Navy days and apparently a few of them died so u cry about it at dinner? Just start a new game FFS πŸ˜† but he's lying so uhhh we get it bro: u just want attention πŸ˜―πŸ˜…πŸ€£ The problem is NONE of them even Play Omungus. How do i tell em that being a poser is a cringe Brie Larson unholesome Black History Month anti-chungus move?
March 2021

Among Us / Amogus

The Battle of Gamestop rages on.

The Battle of Gamestop rages on. Pre-market we could hear the bears in no-man’s land, baiting us towards higher prices so the shorts could do their dirty work. I was stationed at the 13.80 line, and knew the morning was going to be hot. I shoveled a breakfast of tendies and said a quick prayer to Father Cohen. When the bell rang, the bears surged into our trenches. Blood and rainbow fur filled the air and littered the ground. The Diamond Division has seen worse days, and we held firm. As the bears retreated we gave chase to retake ground we’d lost in the past week. As I caught my breath near the 14.50, I could see bodies everywhere; paper hands who had fallen in earlier battles. One of them groaned and reached a hand towards me. I spat on him and kept moving. No honor in retreat, and no sympathy for self-inflicted wounds. This war won’t be won in a day, but it will be won. Tell my wife’s boyfriend to tell her I love her.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

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