[Copypasta] Penis Inspection Day

twitchquotes: I was talking to some people I know, and apparently I'm the only person who remembers "Penis Inspection Day" in Elementary School. The gym teacher took us into the washroom one at a time while everyone else kept playing, and tugged our foreskin back and inspected our penis to make sure we were developing properly and keeping clean. Surely I can't be the only one who remembers this, other people must have had Penis Inspection Day at their school too.
twitch chat
December 2019
(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

My name is Kixelated

twitchquotes: Hi, my name is Kixelated, you might know me from the 3rd division of the 22nd branch of Twitchโ€™s official Nazi party. I am here to use my powers as one of the most important men of the our beloved Nazi party to ban all twitch MODERATORS that arenโ€™t doing their job. You are supposed to prevent communism from spreading by banning all of the one man spammers, but instead, you are exactly like them. I want to let you know that you guys are fired
twitch chat
February 2015
Forsen

MODS

Dear streamer, I will be joining the doubters

twitchquotes: ๐Ÿ“œ โœ๏ธ Sadge ๐““๐“ฎ๐“ช๐“ป [streamer name] , ๐“˜ ๐“ป๐“ฎ๐“ฐ๐“ป๐“ฎ๐“ฝ๐“ฏ๐“พ๐“ต๐“ต๐”‚ ๐”€๐“ฒ๐“ต๐“ต ๐“ซ๐“ฎ ๐“ป๐“ฎ๐“ผ๐“ฒ๐“ฐ๐“ท๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ฐ ๐“ฏ๐“ป๐“ธ๐“ถ ๐“ซ๐“ฎ๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ฐ ๐“ช ๐“ซ๐“ฎ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ฎ๐“ฟ๐“ฎ๐“ป ๐“ช๐“ท๐“ญ ๐”€๐“ฒ๐“ต๐“ต ๐“ซ๐“ฎ ๐“ณ๐“ธ๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ฐ ๐“ฝ๐“ฑ๐“ฎ ๐“ญ๐“ธ๐“พ๐“ซ๐“ฝ๐“ฎ๐“ป๐“ผ ๐“ฒ๐“ท ๐“ญ๐“ธ๐“พ๐“ซ๐“ฝ๐“ฒ๐“ท๐“ฐ ๐”‚๐“ธ๐“พ๐“ป ๐“ช๐“ซ๐“ฒ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ฝ๐“ฒ๐“ฎ๐“ผ.
twitch chat
February 2021

Please quit calling it "Victory Fap"

twitchquotes: Would you guys please quit calling it "Victory Fap"? I find it very offensive, and I'm sure Rania does too, that you think Kripp can only become aroused through dominance in a child's card game. Please grow up chat, thanks
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

AITA for ending my marriage over Animal Crossing??

I (65m) and my wife 24(f) have been together for 8 years, married for 4. All my friends are jealous that i was able to score such a hot young woman but itโ€™s starting to cause some problems in our relationship believe it or not. When the pandemic hit, I was very nervous since Iโ€™m not in great health. We decided to buy the Nintendo Switch and play this game called Animal Crossing. I guess itโ€™s popular with the kids? Anywho, we start building this town and everything was fine at first. Then, my wife decides that she wants to remodel the town. No problem. But she starts cutting down all the trees, destroying the cliffs, removing the river, etc... I told her this is out of line. We should respect nature not destroy it. Her answer? It was ugly and she didnโ€™t like to walk the long way around. She also takes all of my hard earned money from fishing and gambles it all away on turnip stocks. Last week she spent 400k on turnips and sold them for 260k. Do you know how many red snappers I need to catch to make that back up? Iโ€™m trying to retire soon and itโ€™s making me think she doesnโ€™t know how to manage money. What really drove me to the breaking point, my best friend Boon is on the island and we really get along. He likes to lift weights, so do I. I log into the game one day and build him a gift. When I try to find him, heโ€™s nowhere to be found... I ask, where is boon? She doesnโ€™t answer. Where is Boon ?? She says โ€œI kicked him off the island, he was annoyingโ€. Reddit, she kicked my best friend off the island without even talking to me. The next day I filed for divorce and kicked her out. Iโ€™m keeping the switch and rebuilding our town. Hopefully Boon comes back. AITA or did I doge a bullet with my sociopathic (ex)wife? Edit: Thank you all for the support and messages over the last 24hrs. Itโ€™s been a wild day but the good news is that after a few hours of island hopping I was able to find Boon and convince him to come back to my island. Seems like things are heading in the right direction.
August 2021

AITA

Red futures :(

Bought a bunch of calls thinking I was going to be able to afford an escort to shit on my chest, now it's these red futures that are shitting on my chest.
February 2021

WallStreetBets

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