[Copypasta] My poop story

twitchquotes: My poop story. I lived in a dookie (pun on purpose) apartment complex in a college town, literally $300 a month, on a river in the south. So a small and always very high maintenance team worked for them. They showed up (stoned) and were changing everyone’s filters. Heard. Ok come in. I had a particularly funky little caesars pizza not an hour before the incident. We were making small talk and such as these things tend to linger, I suddenly felt a disturbance in my lower gut (bubbleguts). I felt confident in my distance from the maintenance guy that I got squeeze out a fart and then distract him into another room. This was no fart. At slightest bit of effort I put towards this fart a flood of terrible pizza diarrhea shot out of my ass like a goddamn rocket. As I was staring this man in the eye. I was staring another human being in the eyes...while I pooed my pants. To this day not only do I have no clue if he knew or not but I would still pay thousands of dollars to just see my face when that happened. That is my poop story.
twitch chat
June 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Traumatized Mr Incredible

βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬›β¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–β¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–β¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž– βž–βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž– βž–βž–β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬œβ¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›β¬›βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž– βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–βž–
February 2022

Too salty for table salt

twitchquotes: Kripp, when you have dinner with Reynad, do you even need table salt?
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

This video is sponsored by NordVPN

This video is sponsored by NordVPN. Staying safe online is an ever growing difficulty and you could be exploited by hackers. NordVPN allows you to change your IP address, making you harder to track, securing your privacy. Check out the link in the description to get 20% off for the first two months and thank you to NordVPN for sponsoring this video.
March 2021

I hope Tahm wins xD

twitchquotes: I hope Tahm wins xD OSFrog I’m a Tahm main and he’s just so fun ! OSFrog People get so trolled by the Q damage, and his voice lines are so alpha like when he talks about his tongue LOL OSFrog He’s super random but also stronger than he looks, just like Sneaky xD OSFrog
twitch chat
September 2020

League of Legends

Kermit the Frog and the Twin Towers

It is actual Muppets canon that Kermit the Frog, in some way, had a role in bringing down the Twin Towers in the terror attacks of September 11, 2001. In "It's a Very Muppets Christmas Movie," a film released in late 2002, Kermit is shown a glimpse of what New York City might look like if he had never been born. Among the scenery of this alternate reality NYC, we find none other than the Twin Towers proudly standing in the background. They were, of course, long destroyed in Kermit's normal reality. And yet, in the world without Kermit, the war on terror is missing its powder keg spark. Who would've thought that green piece of fuck could kermit a terror attack on US soil, but there it stands unimpeachable... We have concrete, canon proof of involvement. Why the world hasn't stopped and asked further questions is only further proof of a media cabal keeping this conversation away from the masses. The Twin Towers would still be standing if it weren't for Kermit the Frog. Al Qaeda was the puppet this time, and Kermit the hand within.
April 2022
Text-to-Speech Playing