[Copypasta] My poop story

twitchquotes: My poop story. I lived in a dookie (pun on purpose) apartment complex in a college town, literally $300 a month, on a river in the south. So a small and always very high maintenance team worked for them. They showed up (stoned) and were changing everyoneโ€™s filters. Heard. Ok come in. I had a particularly funky little caesars pizza not an hour before the incident. We were making small talk and such as these things tend to linger, I suddenly felt a disturbance in my lower gut (bubbleguts). I felt confident in my distance from the maintenance guy that I got squeeze out a fart and then distract him into another room. This was no fart. At slightest bit of effort I put towards this fart a flood of terrible pizza diarrhea shot out of my ass like a goddamn rocket. As I was staring this man in the eye. I was staring another human being in the eyes...while I pooed my pants. To this day not only do I have no clue if he knew or not but I would still pay thousands of dollars to just see my face when that happened. That is my poop story.
twitch chat
June 2019
What happened to this ad? :(
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My laptop gets hot when chat is spammed

twitchquotes: Guys can you please not spam the chat. My mom bought me this new laptop and it gets really hot when the chat is being spamed. Now my leg is starting to hurt because it is getting so hot. Please, if you don't want me to get burned, then dont spam the chat
twitch chat
August 2014

Classic

Krippler and the Donger people

twitchquotes: Krippler's aim is to establish a New Order of absolute Nazi German hegemony in the Twitch Metaverse. To this end, his foreign and domestic policies had the aim of seizing Lebensraum ("living space") for the Donger people. Under Krippler's rule, in 1941 German forces and their European allies occupied most of Europe and North Africa.
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March 2014
Kripp

Yuno Gasai

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–‘โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–Œโ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–โ–€โ–Œโ–€โ–Œโ–„โ–’โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–€โ–„โ–Œโ–Œโ–โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–โ–โ–’โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–„โ– โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–„โ–€โ–„โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–’โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–€โ–„ โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€ โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–Œโ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–Œโ–โ–’โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–’โ–โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–‘โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–โ–’โ–‘โ–‘โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–Œโ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–‘โ– โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–โ–โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–Œโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–‘โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–Œโ–โ–’โ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–€โ–„โ–Œโ–‘โ–โ–’โ–’
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Weebs

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July 2020
xQcOW

Smash bros with the bros

twitchquotes: Dude this reminds me of this one time me and the bros were just hanging out like five of us and we all got pizza, and we were actually playing some smash too but there were five of us and so we played that game where whoever loses has to switch out with the guy who's not playing and the loser has to blow the guy who won until the next game is up, but not like in a gay way, more in just like some added stakes to win the game, but it was pretty fun tbh so I could see how being gay wouldn't be that bad at the end of the day.
twitch chat
September 2020

KappaPride

Super Smash Bros

Text-to-Speech Playing