[Copypasta] Sir you have been found with Rocket League hacks

twitchquotes: Sir you have been found with Rocket League hacks. A SWAT team is on the way to your location. Make sure the door is open, otherwise they are ready to break it down. Don't destroy any evidence and don't contact your accomplices! Prepare disks, flash drives and any other multimedia devices containing illegal materials, proving your criminality. Be prepared to answer the questions during your interrogation! Cooperate and don't deny the charges against you.
twitch chat
June 2019
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Faceful Void

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘ โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘ โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘ โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–โ–‘โ–โ–Œโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–„โ–โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–Œโ–‘ โ–โ–Œโ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–‘โ–โ–‘ โ–‘โ–Œโ–โ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–Œโ–โ–€ โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
June 2015

Dota 2

A Reddit comment summarized and compressed

Anne frankly, I did nazi that coming. I literally came here to say this but boy, that escalated quickly so to the top with you! Lost it at 'This is why we can't have nice things' and then my faith in humanity was restored, my mind blown, and manly tears were shed. Well said. As a 'murican, I can confirm this gem has just won the internet and is doing it right. Just sayin', I know that feel, bro, and while that was a risky click, this post was a 9/10, 11/10 with rice, would read again. I see what you did there and it feels good man. You're doing God's work, son. I laughed way harder than I should have at your list that seems legit and totally nailed it. You - I like you. You magnificent bastard; you, sir, are so brave, a gentleman and a scholar, and seeing how you are a redditor for 4 years, this checks out, so I'll allow it. I regret that I only have one upvote to give for this cool story, bro. CTRL+F "about tree fiddy" was not disappointed. Wait, why do I have you tagged as "NOPE NOPE NOPE"? Nice try, you monster. You are now banned from /r/pyongyang What did I just read? Dafuq? I read that as "YOU HAD ONE JOB". I can't fap to this. No true scotsman could see that this relevant XKCD was bad, and you should feel bad. You must be new to reddit, so I'll see your cakeday and raise you a karma train. One does not simply rustle my jimmies, not even once. Jet fuel can't melt dank memes, that stahp gave me cancer for science, so that's enough internet for me today. OP is a fuzzy little man-peach, 2/10, would not bang. What is this I don't even know how is this wtf? Fuck Jenny. Circlejerk must be leaking. This will get buried but brace yourselves, some men want to watch the world burn right in the feels. When you see it, they'll KILL IT WITH FIRE! But this has nothing to do with atheism. Lawyer up, delete facebook, hit the gym, and SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY, said no one ever, so you wouldn't download a strawman. /r/dadjokes. Damn onions, you scary like a BOSS. whoosh. Since rule #1 is 'be attractive', I'll just leave this here: This is my [f]irst post, be gentle. Edit: This blew up. RIP my inbox. Edit: thanks for the gold kind stranger
August 2021

Mister I'm-too-boosted-to-read-my-chat

twitchquotes: FeelsRageMan Dear mister I'm-too-boosted-to-read-my-chat FeelsRageMan This will be the last message I ever send your ass FeelsRageMan
twitch chat
September 2017
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Let Papparrian have his son back!

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, Papparian here. You have been doing this game thing for awhile now. And its going to lose its entertainmentarino. My idea is a Papparian Kripparian father son baking show. We cook food from our home world where we Gypsies originally came from. How about it son? Let Papparian have his son back!....
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Send me nudes. Not your naked body

twitchquotes: Send me nudes. Not your naked body, not your bare skin. I want your nudes, your naked truths. Your secrets. Your lies. Your fears. The unfiltered thoughts you kept hidden for years. I won't judge. I'll listen. For your truths are real and that's who I want to know.
twitch chat
February 2019

Not your naked body

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