[Copypasta] I want to become a walrus

twitchquotes: Hello, I am currently 15 years old and I want to become a walrus. I know there's a million people out there just like me, but I promise you I'm different. On December 14th, I'm moving to Antarctica; home of the greatest walri. I've already cut off my arms, and now slide on my stomach everywhere I go as training. I may not be a walrus yet, but I promise you if you give me a chance and the support I need, I will become the greatest walrus ever. Thank you all.
twitch chat
July 2014

Classic

(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Watashi wa a victim of cyberbullying

Watashi wa a victim of cyberbullying. Everyday someone online calls me a "weeb" desu. Watashi won't stand for this. 26 percent of bullying victims are chosen due to their race or religion desu. I may look like a basic white boy, but deep down I am Nihongo desu. Watashi religion is anime. Anata wa bullying me because of my race and religion desu ka? Disgusting desu. Anata should be ashamed of yourself, racist pig. A baka gaijin like anata is probably jealous of my race and culture, cause Nippon is more sugoi than your shitty country desu. Watashi pity anata. You'll never be Nihongo like watashi. I'm a weeb? Pfft. I AM AN OTAKU DESU. Educate yourself on nani a "weeb" is before anata try to insult watashi desu. I WILL NOT BE CYBERBULLIED ANYMORE. REPORTED.
December 2018

Weebs

Classic

Gitraktmaet motherships descend upon the Earth

twitchquotes: High in orbit, the Gitraktmaet motherships descend upon the Earth. They prepare to enslave the world and mine it for all its salt, but the scanners detect an abnormally high concentration inside a tiny shack in Greece. The invasion won't be necessary. "Lock onto him with the RNG disruptor," says the captain, greedily. "Soon we shall have all the salt we need."
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

Classic

salty

QT's stream ends, so does my life

twitchquotes: FeelsBadMan ̿' ̿'\̵͇̿̿\ qt's stream ends, so does my life FeelsBadMan ̿' ̿'\̵͇̿̿\
twitch chat
March 2016
imaqtpie

Classic

YUGIOH KEEPS INTERRUPTING MY AD MARATHON

twitchquotes: 📞 📞 BabyRage HELLO TWITCH? 📞 BabyRage THIS YUGIOH THINGY 📞 BabyRage KEEPS INTERRUPTING 📞 BabyRage MY AD MARATHON 📞 BabyRage
twitch chat
October 2017
TwitchPresents

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YuGiOh Ad Marathon

I've been making fake sub names for Kripp

twitchquotes: Hey, my name is Carlton Pasterino. I have something to confess. For the last 3 years I've been making fake sub names for Kripp. He pays me pennies and dimes to come up with 50 new names a day. From Thundercuck to MrRabbit69, I've made over 80% of his subs up for him. I'm tired of working like a child laborer. I'm ready to go back to college and make something of myself. I'm here to let the world know.
twitch chat
December 2016
Kripp

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing