[Copypasta] I want a man who is a cunning linguist

twitchquotes: "Are you sure you've ever pleasured a woman before, poppet?" Mother asked with a snear, unamused by the clumsy performance of a rapper who couldn't use his tongue. "I'm doing my best, yo!" he replied, muffled between Mother's thighs. "You talk a big game, Mr. Dab, but you are proving to be quite a disappointment." The tattoo-faced man lifted his head aghast, his voice raising in pitch, "I got you a limo, yo, what else do you want?" Mother chuckled, "I want a man who is a cunning linguist"
twitch chat
May 2019
MOONMOON
I used to be a real ad
More MOONMOON Copypastas

The year is 2025. MoonMoon lies on his deathbed

twitchquotes: The year is 2025. MoonMoon_Ow lies on his deathbed, the countless years of oatmeal infighting finally having taken their toll. He struggles to adjust his eyes to the glare of his computer screen, yearning to view his beloved twitch chat one more time. All he sees is degenerate weeb spam. His eyes brim with tears. He begins gasping his final breath, and in his final moments he hits the hardest dab known to humanity
twitch chat
January 2018
MOONMOON

Moonmoon subs are the most toxic?

twitchquotes: Is there any particular reason that your subs are the most toxic, useless wastes of life on all of twitch? I get that streaming gaming tends to attract a lot of losers, but what is it about your subs that makes them so uniquely cancerous? What makes them want to venture out of their trailers and basements to spam and shitpost where they aren't wanted? Is it too much to ask that you savages contain yourselves to the bowels of twitch?
twitch chat
July 2017
MOONMOON

I'm a streamer that is in LOVE with Weebs!

twitchquotes: I'm MoonMoon_OwO! i'm a streamer that is in LOVE with Weebs! That's right! I know it sounds crazy because bald streamers aren't supposed to appreciate true art, but I grew up with anime and have just never really wanted anything to do with normies! It just feels so good to be a degenerate weeb loving this Japanese media! I can't help myself! Their power levels and tourneyment arcs... I'm getting too excited now! I need to go to crunchyroll! I'm going to go watch some anime!
twitch chat
July 2019
MOONMOON

Catch ya in the gym... not

twitchquotes: moon2EZ sup nerds DrinkPurple *sips Monster Energy Drink*. Name's Kyle, and you losers wish you were me. All I need in this world is my sick JUUL Vape pen, a 12 pack of Monsters, and some drywall to punch. I only wear the finest Tapout and Affliction T-shirts and I'm the best fry cook Applebee's has ever had. While you waste away your day on this fucking bald guy's nerd chat, I'll be talking to tons of hot babes on my MetroPCS iPhone. Anyways, stay mad losers, I'm outta here moon2EZ Catch ya in the gym... not
twitch chat
June 2019
MOONMOON

MoonMoon subs in all my streams spamming emotes

twitchquotes: Fucking MoonMoon subs in all my streams spamming these stupid fucking emotes. I swear they're all 12 year old kids who subbed to this goofy ass mother fucker (who's not even good at the game, just a decent tank player who gets carried) with their mom's credit cards they stole. If I see one more goddamn purple face I think I'm going to scream. My AGDQ chat experience has been ruined time and time again by these spammers and frankly, I'm getting tired of it.
twitch chat
August 2017
MOONMOON
Text-to-Speech Playing